allthumbs Posted March 1, 2002 Posted March 1, 2002 What level of conversation is acceptable when using a urinal? When two strange men are standing next to each other, dicks in hand, their backs to other men, there are two messages they generally want to relay to one another: I’m not gay; and I hope you’re not gay. (I assume the message gay guys want to convey is I am gay, but I’m just taking a piss). In order to convey this message, I think the following rules should apply: Stare straight ahead or look down at your own penis, as if encouraging it to pee. Do not look at your neighbor, but be careful not to look in the opposite direction from him. Looking away conveys a sense of submissiveness, which you do not wish to convey while standing next to a suspected homosexual holding his penis (he’s holding his penis, not you). Conversation is acceptable but should be limited to sports or breasts. I think topics to avoid should include fashion, baking, and ballet. In the unfortunate instance that you are at the ballet, the proper urinal comment should be "Man, those girls sure have nice cans." What do you guys think? Quote
Dru Posted March 1, 2002 Posted March 1, 2002 quote: Originally posted by trask: What level of conversation is acceptable when using a urinal?When two strange men are standing next to each other, dicks in hand, their backs to other men, there are two messages they generally want to relay to one another: I’m not gay; and I hope you’re not gay. (I assume the message gay guys want to convey is I am gay, but I’m just taking a piss). In order to convey this message, I think the following rules should apply: Stare straight ahead or look down at your own penis, as if encouraging it to pee. Do not look at your neighbor, but be careful not to look in the opposite direction from him. Looking away conveys a sense of submissiveness, which you do not wish to convey while standing next to a suspected homosexual holding his penis (he’s holding his penis, not you). Conversation is acceptable but should be limited to sports or breasts. I think topics to avoid should include fashion, baking, and ballet. In the unfortunate instance that you are at the ballet, the proper urinal comment should be "Man, those girls sure have nice cans." What do you guys think? I think you better not converse at all cause you dont want the other guy to think your looking at him. I prefer to stare up into space, and either hum,or moan with relief so he will know how long i held it in for. where do you come up with these stupid topics trask? Quote
sayjay Posted March 1, 2002 Posted March 1, 2002 I think Freud would have had a lot of fun with you. Quote
erik Posted March 1, 2002 Posted March 1, 2002 trask is a beam of light shinning down on us from heaven....... a well medicated one, but still.....from above!!! [ 03-01-2002: Message edited by: erik ] Quote
pope Posted March 1, 2002 Posted March 1, 2002 Players with short bats should step closer to the plate. Quote
Dru Posted March 1, 2002 Posted March 1, 2002 quote: Originally posted by pope: Players with short bats should step closer to the plate. You should be alert for the sound of running water cause some guys have "blushing bladder" and can't pee with other men nearby. for their sake if you hear silence from next urinal, finish your business fast and get out of there so they can get the deed done. Quote
Elvis Posted March 1, 2002 Posted March 1, 2002 quote: Originally posted by pope: Players with short bats should step closer to the plate. ... and some need to choke up Quote
Dru Posted March 1, 2002 Posted March 1, 2002 non sequitir: http://www.ananova.com/news/story/sm_531837.html?menu=news.quirkies Quote
sayjay Posted March 1, 2002 Posted March 1, 2002 what I want to know, trask, is what you'd do in this situation... Quote
sayjay Posted March 1, 2002 Posted March 1, 2002 (and yes, she is peeing. if you don't believe me go to icegirl's home page and click on the "Freshette" link) Quote
Elvis Posted March 1, 2002 Posted March 1, 2002 Why that picture is just, well... uh... well its just not right, its un-Amercian. Something kinda wierd about a woman that pees standing up. Quote
erik Posted March 1, 2002 Posted March 1, 2002 i mean whoa a girl in the boyz bathromm wtf??? [ 03-01-2002: Message edited by: erik ] Quote
moron Posted March 1, 2002 Posted March 1, 2002 Stand as far away from the urinal as possible, open up a loud conversation with the guys on both sides, alternate eye contact with the guys on either side with a Stevie Wonder sort of motion, and SPRAY! Quote
allthumbs Posted March 1, 2002 Author Posted March 1, 2002 quote: Originally posted by sayjay: what I want to know, trask, is what you'd do in this situation... If it were me, I'd grin and bare it... Quote
Dru Posted March 1, 2002 Posted March 1, 2002 quote: Originally posted by erik: in some sick euro way i kinda like it reminds me of the scene at the start of full monty with the chick peeing in the urinal. i heard girlz with strong kegel muscles can do this but i wouldnt want to use their shower if they'd been practising in it Quote
Peter_Puget Posted March 1, 2002 Posted March 1, 2002 OK, I hesitate to even put this story to print. The names have been suppressed to protect those involved. Many many years ago, a climber had a lease on some warehouse space and to make a few extra bucks he would rent it out to various groups for party purposes. Of course along with the warehouse came a collection of low brow climbing types. (namely: his friends) Well at one particular party a short cute blonde caught an unnamed climber’s eye. After several hours of flirting he was psyched! Fortunately the low brow climbers were of both sexes and an alert female caught on to the fact that the cute blonde was a girl with “something extra.” After some debate the male climbers were only partially convinced and our paramour climber could not be persuaded until the cute blonde could hold her bladder no longer and was caught red handed, so to speak, urinating standing up with her piss stream a yellow arc extending several feet before her. Quote
allthumbs Posted March 1, 2002 Author Posted March 1, 2002 By the way, when I was throwing away my garbage at Taco Bell today, should I have held the little swinging lid on the trash container open for the next customer? I didn't, and he looked pissed. Quote
Dwayner Posted March 1, 2002 Posted March 1, 2002 The correct technical term for observing an individual at a neighboring urinal is "meat-gazing", from the compound verb, "to meat-gaze". Practitioners, whether of the comparative sort, "just curious" type or whatever, are known as "Meat-Gazers". I do not care for this sort of behavior, and when it occurs, I bring an end to it quickly by loudly and publicly announcing, "Eyes Forward, Meat-Gazer!!!" This usually solves the problem. I will occasionally yell this in the company of my innocent climbing buddies in a well crowded restroom, just to be annoying. - Dwayner Quote
Dru Posted March 1, 2002 Posted March 1, 2002 I knew a guy who would go into a stall, close the door, then just start MOANING super loud for a fewminutes and then announce out loud "I can see the head!" Quote
vegetablebelay Posted March 2, 2002 Posted March 2, 2002 I just saw a buddy of mine the other night who over a few beers confessed that he had recently gone into a restroom of a local restaurant and was reading an article in the newspaper tacked above the urinal while he was taking a whizz. He got thru the entire article and soon realized he had never hit the urinal at all and was standing in a HUGE puddle The worst thing was, he was completely SOBER!!! Quote
Dru Posted March 2, 2002 Posted March 2, 2002 grafitti above urinal. "Look LEFT." On left wall of stall "Look Right" On right wall "Look UP" On ceiling "You idiot, you're pissing on your shoes!" Quote
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