tvashtarkatena Posted December 28, 2009 Share Posted December 28, 2009 (edited) Why wasn't this guy already dead in a Predator drone missile strike? That's the vision: Dome the entire country, and take out the Bad Guys with a push of a button...inside or outside The Dome. No muss, no fuss. Now back to our regularly scheduled programming. You gotta love the term Homeland Security, too. What a wholesome mix of Der Faderland, Mom's apple pie, paranoid xenophobia, New Speak, and the comfort of a soft, fuzzy widdle blankie; perfect for that half of our population with the mentality of a spoiled 6 year old. I wonder how much the Bush Administration paid that lucky PR firm to come up with it? I forgot the mini domed security enclaves for asset strippers within the maxi dome. Da-Double-Dy Domeland, chock full Dubyas, Double Dees, and Domestics. Right out of a Robert Heinlein novella...had he been psychopathic. Edited December 28, 2009 by tvashtarkatena Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
prole Posted December 28, 2009 Author Share Posted December 28, 2009 You guys are depressing me again. s'all good Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mtguide Posted December 29, 2009 Share Posted December 29, 2009 Airline Security: No parody required. An oxymoron in the same class as "Military Intelligence". Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bug Posted December 29, 2009 Share Posted December 29, 2009 This one was Obamma's fault. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Off_White Posted December 31, 2009 Share Posted December 31, 2009 Here's a little cheatsheet for those who aren't too gud at math: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
archenemy Posted January 3, 2010 Share Posted January 3, 2010 Flying is fun. The last few months have been a blast. Ever try to get through security with crutches and a metal leg? Holy shit what an ordeal. And SeaTac has been the worst. Hell, even when I was down to a cane I was dreading going through security. I had just gotten off my crutches, still had to use a cane for every step, and had to walk through security with it. A very short, angry, not-quite-human security chick was so put out when I had to walk over to get "checked". I carefully stepped onto the little footprint markers on the matt while balancing and wincing. The fucking bitch grabbed my cane and took it out from under my hand (of course, I was leaning on it). I slipped sideways and grabbed a table to keep from falling over. I looked down at her and just said, "Don't do that". She asked me if I wanted a "private" screening. I didn't know what the hell she meant so I said no. The lady dragon said ok and proceeded to pretty much grab my tits. I couldn't believe it. I didn't even get charged for it. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bug Posted January 3, 2010 Share Posted January 3, 2010 There are lawers who make a living off of incidents like that. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tvashtarkatena Posted January 3, 2010 Share Posted January 3, 2010 I just applied for a TSA screener job. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
archenemy Posted January 3, 2010 Share Posted January 3, 2010 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tvashtarkatena Posted January 3, 2010 Share Posted January 3, 2010 Would you like a private screening, honey? God, how I love the modern world. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
billcoe Posted January 6, 2010 Share Posted January 6, 2010 WTF? So we get to face stricter security and surveillance measures in gates and on airplanes because the cretins they hired to do these jobs can't even apply the measures that already exist? They are stepping it up, they just kick Joan Rivers off a flight cause she's a scary bitch had a passport issue. TSA, saving your ass from Joan Rivers "Rivers, 76, was deemed a danger to national security and booted from a Newark-bound flight in Costa Rica on Sunday by a jittery Continental Airlines gate agent who found the two names on her passport fishy." LOL! Round up the entertainers and comedians first....good idea. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Peter_Puget Posted January 6, 2010 Share Posted January 6, 2010 I was out of the country for a bit and accidentally yet successfully “smuggled” forbidden items on board aircraft several times. This despite having to pass thru several layers of security. The only thorough search I was subject to was at a military checkpoint in the middle of nowhere in Chiapas - many miles from an airport. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
billcoe Posted January 6, 2010 Share Posted January 6, 2010 A year ago I went to Thailand and carried my Trango Shark through 3 TSA screenings to get out of the US of A. PDX once, San Fran twice. Malcolm says that the same folks that make Buck Knife blades make this, and it's razor sharp. I got all the way to Thailand and they fished my rack out of my carry on and to my horror I saw it on the rack and though it was about to be repoed. They missed it too, just like the 3 sceenings in America. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
olyclimber Posted January 6, 2010 Share Posted January 6, 2010 I was out of the country for a bit and accidentally yet successfully “smuggled” forbidden items on board aircraft several times. This despite having to pass thru several layers of security. The only thorough search I was subject to was at a military checkpoint in the middle of nowhere in Chiapas - many miles from an airport. I'm preserving this evidence of illegal activity. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
prole Posted January 6, 2010 Author Share Posted January 6, 2010 "Rivers, 76, was deemed a danger to national security and booted from a Newark-bound flight in Costa Rica on Sunday... It's about fucking time. That bitch has been terrorizing us for years. Waterboarding, tribunals, Guantanamo, whatever it takes to keep us safe from this creature... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Peter_Puget Posted January 6, 2010 Share Posted January 6, 2010 I was out of the country for a bit and accidentally yet successfully “smuggled” forbidden items on board aircraft several times. This despite having to pass thru several layers of security. The only thorough search I was subject to was at a military checkpoint in the middle of nowhere in Chiapas - many miles from an airport. I'm preserving this evidence of illegal activity. I am not ashamed to be a revolutionary. The Reagan Revolution that is! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
prole Posted January 6, 2010 Author Share Posted January 6, 2010 I am not ashamed to be a revolutionary. The Reagan Revolution that is! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tvashtarkatena Posted January 6, 2010 Share Posted January 6, 2010 Joan Rivers is funnier that hell. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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