kevbone Posted January 4, 2008 Posted January 4, 2008 Why did the chicken cross the road? DR. PHIL: The problem we have here is that this chicken won't realize that he must first deal with the problem on 'THIS' side of the road before it goes after the problem on the 'OTHER SIDE' of the road. What we need to do is help him realize how stupid he's acting by not taking on his 'CURRENT' problems before adding 'NEW' problems. OPRAH : Well, I understand that the chicken is having problems, which is why he wants to cross this road so bad. So instead of having the chicken learn from his mistakes and take falls, which is a part of life, I'm going to give this chicken a car so that he can just drive across the road and not live his life like the rest of the chickens. GEORGE W. BUSH: We don't really care why the chicken crossed the road. We just want to know if the chicken is on our side of the road, or not. The chicken is either against us, or for us. There is no middle ground here. COLIN POWELL: Now to the left of the screen, you can clearly see the satellite image of the chicken crossing the road... ANDERSON COOPER - CNN: We have reason to believe there is a chicken, but we have not yet been allowed to have access to the other side of the road. JOHN KERRY: Although I voted to let the chicken cross the road, I am now against it! It was the wrong road to cross, and I was misled about the chicken's intentions. I am not for it now, and will remain against it. NANCY GRACE: That chicken crossed the road because he's GUILTY! You can see it in his eyes and the way he walks. PAT BUCHANAN : To steal the job of a decent, hardworking American. MARTHA STEWART : No one called me to warn me which way that chicken was going. I had a standing order at the Farmer's Market to sell my eggs when the price dropped to a certain level. No little bird gave me any insider information. DR SEUSS: Did the chicken cross the road? Did he cross it with a toad? Yes, the chicken crossed the road, but why it crossed I've not been told. ERNEST HEMINGWAY : To die in the rain. Alone. JERRY FALWELL : Because the chicken was gay! Can't you people see the plain truth?' That's why they call it the 'other side.' Yes, my friends, that chicken is gay. And if you eat that chicken, you will become gay too. I say we boycott all chickens until we sort out this abomination that the liberal media white washes with seemingly harmless phrases like 'the other side. That chicken should not be crossing the road. It's as plain and as simple as that. GRANDPA : In my day we didn't ask why the chicken crossed the road. Somebody told us the chicken crossed the road, and that was good enough. BARBARA WALTERS : Isn't that interesting? In a few moments, we will be listening to the chicken tell, for the first time, the heart warming story of how it experienced a serious case of molting, and went on to accomplish its life long dream of crossing the road. JOHN LENNON: Imagine all the chickens in the world crossing roads together, in peace. ARISTOTLE : It is the nature of chickens to cross the road. BILL GATES: I have just released eChicken2007, which will not only cross roads, but will lay eggs, file your important documents, and balance your check book. Internet Explorer is an integral part of eChicken. This new platform is much more stable and will never cra...#@&&^(C% ........ reboot. ALBERT EINSTEIN : Did the chicken really cross the road, or did the road move beneath the chicken? BILL CLINTON : I did not cross the road with THAT chicken. What is your definition of chicken? AL GORE: I invented the chicken! COLONEL SANDERS : Did I miss one? DICK CHENEY : Where's my gun? AL SHARPTON : Why are all the chickens white? We need some black chickens. Quote
underworld Posted January 4, 2008 Posted January 4, 2008 tvash: in my studies of the poultry sciences and my days as a civil engineer...BLAH BLAH BLAH kkk: to lick ass clowns jayb: to walk away from his neg amort 4 bedroom 3500sqft mcmansion ... ... ... Quote
lI1|1! Posted January 4, 2008 Posted January 4, 2008 g-spotter: to get some corn!!]]] archenemy: there must have been two sexy roosters on the other side of the road. that chivken knew what she wanted. ericb: it says in the bible god wanted it so. olyclimber: so i crossed a road. like you haven't. seahawks: dat smart chicken Quote
Off_White Posted January 4, 2008 Posted January 4, 2008 Maybe this thread will inspire a Rooster visitation, it always makes my day when that guy puts in an appearance. Quote
KaskadskyjKozak Posted January 4, 2008 Posted January 4, 2008 kevbone: what's a chicken? what's a road? david schuldt: liars and crooks sed that the Bushies sent him their to help steel the 2008 ecleshun mattp: this is another abrogation of our civil liberties. we have no right to ask why the chicken crossed the road or monitor his activities. once again an abuse of power by the Bush administration and the Patriot Act Quote
RogerJ Posted January 5, 2008 Posted January 5, 2008 I was always partial to: Because he was stapled to a punk. -r Quote
ClimbingPanther Posted January 5, 2008 Posted January 5, 2008 No 13 Baby: KKK is such an idiot! Look, he misspelled a wurd! Quote
KaskadskyjKozak Posted January 5, 2008 Posted January 5, 2008 virendra7: crossing chicken, luv making, threswholed conscioussssness, nirvana-being, husband's brother Quote
kevbone Posted January 5, 2008 Author Posted January 5, 2008 KKK I love licking ass chicken clowns. Quote
dmuja Posted January 5, 2008 Posted January 5, 2008 Crossing the road is a revolutionary act of resistance! The chicken was obviously attempting to inspire the oppressed masses and join forces with his comrades on the left bank. LONG LIVE CHI! DEEEESTROOOOOY!!!!! Quote
Gary_Yngve Posted January 5, 2008 Posted January 5, 2008 this is funny stuff! John_Frieh: To find a neutrino. Raindawg: Because the road was in its way. And this is what happens when people place roads in the mountains: Gary_Yngve: The photo of the chicken crossing the road is oversharpened. Quote
tvashtarkatena Posted January 5, 2008 Posted January 5, 2008 Fairweather: More of your fictions! BTW, that's a barred rock, not a chicken. Quote
kevbone Posted January 5, 2008 Author Posted January 5, 2008 Man....that looks fun as shit! Where can I get one? Quote
Jeff W Posted January 5, 2008 Posted January 5, 2008 Because the chicken believes in UFOs and a government conspiracy to hide or deny the truth of their existence. Quote
The_Rooster Posted January 5, 2008 Posted January 5, 2008 Why did the chicken cross the road? EVERYBODY ON THIS SITE: "Blah blah blah to get barbecued"..."blah blah to avoid the rotisserie"...blah blah blah cause their delicious!" :anger: I AM TIRED OF THIS QUESTION!!! WHY CAN'T I JUST CROSS THE ROAD TO GET TO THE OTHER SIDE?!? MAYBE I SAW SOME NICE HENS! MAYBE THE FARMER WAS PUTTING SOMETHING OUTSIDE FOR US AND I WAS OVER AT THE NEIGHBOR'S FARM! OR MAYBE, JUST MAYBE, IT'S BECAUSE I'M... FREE RANGE, BEYOTCHES!!!! COCK A DOODLE DOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Quote
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