Entitlement

[minx]

i HATE parents who let a tantrum continue in public, particularly restaurants. whisk that child out of the building immediately! i ate re-heated restaurant food several times b/c the kidlet couldn't get it together. we went to the car until Dad had paid and we could leave. i left a full cart of groceries at the store once b/c he had fixated on a balloon at the check stand. i came back later and finished buying my groceries. people shouldn't be subjected to other people's children's tantrums.

[KaskadskyjKozak]

my two boys have thrown exactly one tantrum apiece...they've figured out that dad and mom can throw a wobbler back at them that far exceeds anything they can dish out...

 

well, i think perhaps you're a tad bit on the lucky side too. my kid has thrown more than his share of tantrums, publicly embarrassed me and annoyed other people. h/e that doesn't mean that i hadn't drawn the line. he was just more stubborn about accepting his inability to get what he wants.

 

i think the key is that he doesn't win them. now that he's older, he's a great kid that behaves himself, mostly does what he's asked with a normal amount of pre-teen grousing, still hugs his mom, opens doors for strangers and says thank you.

 

i think it's a gross oversimplification to say that tantrums in younger children is a reflection of an unhealthy sense of entitlement.

 

I'm glad someone posted something like this.

 

Armchair quarterbacks abound (and often have never played the game).

 

 

[tvashtarkatena]

i HATE parents who let a tantrum continue in public, particularly restaurants. whisk that child out of the building immediately! i ate re-heated restaurant food several times b/c the kidlet couldn't get it together. we went to the car until Dad had paid and we could leave. i left a full cart of groceries at the store once b/c he had fixated on a balloon at the check stand. i came back later and finished buying my groceries. people shouldn't be subjected to other people's children's tantrums.

 

That happened to us this weekend. Two friends just sat their while their 3 year old went at it with 130 dB wails. The dad just muttered under his breath "I'm so tired of these restaurant melt downs". Nice folks, but, for the sake of everyone else, GET THE BRAT OUT OF THERE. Why are parents so afraid to show a little authority when needed these days?

[foraker]

my two boys have thrown exactly one tantrum apiece...they've figured out that dad and mom can throw a wobbler back at them that far exceeds anything they can dish out...

 

well, i think perhaps you're a tad bit on the lucky side too. my kid has thrown more than his share of tantrums, publicly embarrassed me and annoyed other people. h/e that doesn't mean that i hadn't drawn the line. he was just more stubborn about accepting his inability to get what he wants.

 

i think the key is that he doesn't win them. now that he's older, he's a great kid that behaves himself, mostly does what he's asked with a normal amount of pre-teen grousing, still hugs his mom, opens doors for strangers and says thank you.

 

i think it's a gross oversimplification to say that tantrums in younger children is a reflection of an unhealthy sense of entitlement.

 

I'm glad someone posted something like this.

 

Armchair quarterbacks abound (and often have never played the game).

 

 

Kids having a tantrum is one thing. Parents enabling a child's tantrum is another.

[RuMR]

From what I've heard, tantrums reflect an unhealthy sense of being 2 years old.

 

My grandfather, cantankerous Archie Bunker type that he was, once while observing a 2 year throwing a tantrum at a nearby table in a restaurant, summed it up perfectly:

 

Cutting the parents in half with his deadpan stare:

 

"what that kid needs is a

 

 

good, swift, BEATING!!!!"

 

my dad said there were only two types of bawling....first, the "WWWWAAAAAAAAAH! WAAAAAAAH!"...second "sniff sniff sniff"...the second type was usually preceded by a "Smack"...

[RuMR]

my two boys have thrown exactly one tantrum apiece...they've figured out that dad and mom can throw a wobbler back at them that far exceeds anything they can dish out...

 

well, i think perhaps you're a tad bit on the lucky side too. my kid has thrown more than his share of tantrums, publicly embarrassed me and annoyed other people. h/e that doesn't mean that i hadn't drawn the line. he was just more stubborn about accepting his inability to get what he wants.

 

i think the key is that he doesn't win them. now that he's older, he's a great kid that behaves himself, mostly does what he's asked with a normal amount of pre-teen grousing, still hugs his mom, opens doors for strangers and says thank you.

 

i think it's a gross oversimplification to say that tantrums in younger children is a reflection of an unhealthy sense of entitlement.

 

I'm glad someone posted something like this.

 

Armchair quarterbacks abound (and often have never played the game).

 

no armchair qb'ing from either me or minx on this one...trash is another story, methinks...

[RuMR]

i HATE parents who let a tantrum continue in public, particularly restaurants. whisk that child out of the building immediately! i ate re-heated restaurant food several times b/c the kidlet couldn't get it together. we went to the car until Dad had paid and we could leave. i left a full cart of groceries at the store once b/c he had fixated on a balloon at the check stand. i came back later and finished buying my groceries. people shouldn't be subjected to other people's children's tantrums.

 

I am so with you on this one...

[sk]

i HATE parents who let a tantrum continue in public, particularly restaurants. whisk that child out of the building immediately! i ate re-heated restaurant food several times b/c the kidlet couldn't get it together. we went to the car until Dad had paid and we could leave. i left a full cart of groceries at the store once b/c he had fixated on a balloon at the check stand. i came back later and finished buying my groceries. people shouldn't be subjected to other people's children's tantrums.

 

I am so with you on this one...

 

i have always done the same with my boys now 11 and 8. they know that when i say stop or we are leaving it doesn't matter what we are doing. I hauled my youngest our of Disney land cus he started to go. he didn't belive i would march his little but back to the hotel room while his brother stayed at the park with aunty but you bet your ass i did. and i made him appologize to his aunt as well. that was our last day in the park. it made a lasting impression on both my children.

[tvashtarkatena]

Uncles wield their own special power....

[KaskadskyjKozak]

 

Entitlements - isn't that what every Federal DemoLibSocialEngineering program is all about?

[ZimZam]

From what I've heard, tantrums reflect an unhealthy sense of being 2 years old.

 

My grandfather, cantankerous Archie Bunker type that he was, once while observing a 2 year throwing a tantrum at a nearby table in a restaurant, summed it up perfectly:

 

Cutting the parents in half with his deadpan stare:

 

"what that kid needs is a

 

 

good, swift, BEATING!!!!"

 

It's called "the backhand". It's an attention getter.

[KaskadskyjKozak]

no armchair qb'ing from either me or minx on this one...trash is another story, methinks...

 

I definitely wasn't talking about you.

 

I remember being single and thinking how everyone else's kid was a damn brat, what was the world coming to, and couldn't people raise their kids properly. Easy to judge when you haven't walked in someone else's shoes.

 

Of course people are bringing up some egregious examples here - tantrums in the middle of a store or other public place...

[foraker]

Entitlements - isn't that what every Federal DemoLibSocialEngineering program is all about?

 

Oh, there you go with your knee jerk responses again.

[KaskadskyjKozak]

Entitlements - isn't that what every Federal DemoLibSocialEngineering program is all about?

 

Oh, there you go with your knee jerk responses again.

 

Are those programs or are they not called "Entitlement Programs"? Nothing knee-jerk there buddy.

 

[foraker]

And that big new Medicaid program created by Bush and a Republican senate? What was that? Some DemoLibSocialEngineering program? And all that pork-barrel spending the last six years? What was that for? Seems the Republicans know a thing or two about wasteful spending and social engineering. It's just that their social engineering isn't about making society better as it is about enriching their friends.

[KaskadskyjKozak]

And that big new Medicaid program created by Bush and a Republican senate? What was that? Some DemoLibSocialEngineering program? And all that pork-barrel spending the last six years? What was that for? Seems the Republicans know a thing or two about wasteful spending and social engineering. It's just that their social engineering isn't about making society better as it is about enriching their friends.

 

There you go again. And just a few minutes after *I'm* accused of doing this (you must be 100% pro-Republican/Bush/et al. because you criticized Clinton/Dems).

 

As for you examples, two wrongs don't make a right. I'm not a Republican, I'm a moderate Libertartian, so I oppose all that shit. Get that through your skull already.

 

And BTW, Democrat social engineering is not about making society better, it's about buying votes, making people feel like they are doing good (feelings matter more than outcomes after all), solidifying power, and making the plebes dependent. And Republican programs are about the same things, sorry to burst your class-warfare bubble.

 

[JayB]

my two boys have thrown exactly one tantrum apiece...they've figured out that dad and mom can throw a wobbler back at them that far exceeds anything they can dish out...

 

well, i think perhaps you're a tad bit on the lucky side too. my kid has thrown more than his share of tantrums, publicly embarrassed me and annoyed other people. h/e that doesn't mean that i hadn't drawn the line. he was just more stubborn about accepting his inability to get what he wants.

 

i think the key is that he doesn't win them. now that he's older, he's a great kid that behaves himself, mostly does what he's asked with a normal amount of pre-teen grousing, still hugs his mom, opens doors for strangers and says thank you.

 

i think it's a gross oversimplification to say that tantrums in younger children is a reflection of an unhealthy sense of entitlement.

 

True - but if the tantrums are indulged, you can be pretty sure that they'll develop one.

 

What really freaks me out is seeing little boys that hit their Moms - like in the face, with a closed fist - and no one does anything but say "Now Joey, It's not nice to hit Mommy" or something like that. To my mind, a boy that hits either parent - but especially his Mom - knows absolutely no limits or boundaries, and will pretty much hit anyone he feels like. Hell - I can still remember quite clearly what happened the one time that I stuck out my tongue at my Mom, so I can't even begin to imagine the spanking/grounding/toy-removal/and iterative "Never do that again, here's why, and if it ever does happen again, here's what's going to happen" lectures that would have resulted from that.

 

My only hope was that at some point a good, prolonged, and severe ass-whupping on the playground by someone who hits back would send these kids the message that their parents never did, and/or that the violence and misery that their kid would inflict on the rest of the world would primarily be visited on his parents, rather than those who weren't responsible for creating a human with the morals of a goat and the manners of a baboon.

[KaskadskyjKozak]

My only hope was that at some point a good, prolonged, and severe ass-whupping on the playground by someone who hits back would send these kids the message that their parents never did, and/or that the violence and misery that their kid would inflict on the rest of the world would primarily be visited on his parents, rather than those who weren't responsible for creating a human with the morals of a goat and the manners of a baboon.

 

So, the answer to violence is violence and that would somehow turn those kids around?

[rmncwrtr]

i HATE parents who let a tantrum continue in public, particularly restaurants. whisk that child out of the building immediately! i ate re-heated restaurant food several times b/c the kidlet couldn't get it together. we went to the car until Dad had paid and we could leave. i left a full cart of groceries at the store once b/c he had fixated on a balloon at the check stand. i came back later and finished buying my groceries. people shouldn't be subjected to other people's children's tantrums.

 

Us, too. We've had to leave restuarants three times and got the food packed up to go. One time for each of kid. That's all it took for them to learn the lesson. Plus they didn't get the restaurant food to eat but something from home instead and had to go to bed early. I remember when our youngest threw her tantrum. The other two, ages 6 and four at the time, just sat there shaking their heads cause they knew what was coming.

[minx]

i wish my son were that bright. his tantrums were each b/c he didn't like the food at the restaurant. no restaurant food wasn't a punishment (picky eater) going w/o dinner and going straight to bed was punishment. H/E it took him a few times to figure out that we weren't kidding the first time.

[JayB]

The odds are high that at the very least it'll make them think twice about who they hit and when. If the parents don't fulfill this role, someone else will.

 

This reminds me of a coversation that I had with my wife's Aunt and Uncle a while back, who have 3 very nice kids to their credit. The said they never relished disciplining their kids, but they knew that if didn't do it, someone who loved them quite a bit less inevitably would. If it wasn't them, it'd be the teacher, if it wasn't the teacher, it'd be the principal, and a couple of steps later it'd be the police, the warden, or worse.

 

A kid that hits his parents is going to be on the receiving end of a peer-delivered ass-whupping at some point, and the younger they are when it happens, they better of they and everyone else that interacts with them will be for it.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

[KaskadskyjKozak]

The odds are high that at the very least it'll make them think twice about who they hit and when. If the parents don't fulfill this role, someone else will.

 

This reminds me of a coversation that I had with my wife's Aunt and Uncle a while back, who have 3 very nice kids to their credit. The said they never relished disciplining their kids, but they knew that if didn't do it, someone who loved them quite a bit less inevitably would. If it wasn't them, it'd be the teacher, if it wasn't the teacher, it'd be the principal, and a couple of steps later it'd be the police, the warden, or worse.

 

A kid that hits his parents is going to be on the receiving end of a peer-delivered ass-whupping at some point, and the younger they are when it happens, they better of they and everyone else that interacts with them will be for it.

 

Schools in this day and age do not tolerate "ass whoopings" one bit. Any game or play which similates or looks violent or aggressive in any way is shut down immediately, and fights are treated very strictly. At least that's my experience two school districts (Everett and Bellevue)

 

 

 

 

[foraker]

i wish my son were that bright. his tantrums were each b/c he didn't like the food at the restaurant. no restaurant food wasn't a punishment (picky eater) going w/o dinner and going straight to bed was punishment. H/E it took him a few times to figure out that we weren't kidding the first time.

 

that's where the "if you don't eat it now you'll be eating it cold for breakfast" ploy always comes in handy.

[RuMR]

My only hope was that at some point a good, prolonged, and severe ass-whupping on the playground by someone who hits back would send these kids the message that their parents never did, and/or that the violence and misery that their kid would inflict on the rest of the world would primarily be visited on his parents, rather than those who weren't responsible for creating a human with the morals of a goat and the manners of a baboon.

 

So, the answer to violence is violence and that would somehow turn those kids around?

 

it sure the hell does...

[minx]

i wish my son were that bright. his tantrums were each b/c he didn't like the food at the restaurant. no restaurant food wasn't a punishment (picky eater) going w/o dinner and going straight to bed was punishment. H/E it took him a few times to figure out that we weren't kidding the first time.

 

that's where the "if you don't eat it now you'll be eating it cold for breakfast" ploy always comes in handy.

 

oh yeah-- been there. he's gone a long time w/o eating. he's got a heck of a stubborn streak. can't imagine where he got that from