Is Barbie getting what she deserves?

[lI1|1!]

barbie could ride a like horseback. freaky.

[minx]

Dru-- it's so obvious how thrilled sobo is to be able to become a parent again. there are lots of hurdles and problems with adoption, not the least of which is bureaucracy. any country that has a straight foward process for adopting a child will become a "popular" choice for prospective parents. that's good ol' common sense, not a fad.

 

imagine how insulting it would be to say to your neighbors that they were being trendy b/c they just had a child in the usual way. it's just as insulting to imply that Sobo and wife selected China for adoption b/c it's trendy. Personally, I would've bitch slapped you if you had told me I was being trendy when I had my son.

[EWolfe]

Barbie is alive and well and living at the Hefner mansion.

[minx]

Barbie is alive and well and living at the Hefner mansion.

 

damn, that bitch has more lives than a cat!

 

arch-don't be jealous of barbie and her enormous boobs, she's just going to have back problems when she's older.

[Dru]

Dru-- it's so obvious how thrilled sobo is to be able to become a parent again. there are lots of hurdles and problems with adoption, not the least of which is bureaucracy. any country that has a straight foward process for adopting a child will become a "popular" choice for prospective parents. that's good ol' common sense, not a fad.

 

imagine how insulting it would be to say to your neighbors that they were being trendy b/c they just had a child in the usual way. it's just as insulting to imply that Sobo and wife selected China for adoption b/c it's trendy. Personally, I would've bitch slapped you if you had told me I was being trendy when I had my son.

 

Read what I wrote.

I did not tell sobo he was being trendy. I said that there is apparently a fad for adopting Chinese kids. Which probabnly explains the creepy multiracial Barbie mother/daughter thing.

 

sobo adopted a Vietnamese kid. I did not say he was part of a fad. He, and you apparently, jumped to some weird conclusion.

 

So chill.

[minx]

Dru-

 

i guess i've just my panties in a twist b/c you implied that adopting from any particular country could be considered a fad.

[Dru]

Let me tell you - when Vancouver Magazine (glossy publication given out free to wealthy households in Greater Vancouver) does an article on anything, whether it is adopting from China, how orange is the new black, or income trusts, it's officially a fad.

[snugtop]

When there's a flood of people suddenly trying to adopt Ethiopian babies because Angelina did...it's a fad.

 

I haven't read the rest of this thread. So no offense to anyone who adopted. Adopting is cool--fad or not! People should cut down on their breeding and take care of the kids out there who need homes, wherever they are from. I wish more people would consider adoption as a viable alternative to breeding--instead of considering it only when they *can't* get pregnant...

[Squid]

I wish more people would consider adoption as a viable alternative to breeding--instead of considering it only when they *can't* get pregnant...

 

 

I wish more people would consider gardening or backgammon as a viable alternative to breeding.

[Dru]

Or ice climbing in the Gorge.

[catbirdseat]

There was a story on the TV about a woman who wanted to look like barbie and set out to do so through cosmetic surgery. I think I saw the lead in, but not the actual story itself.

 

A gold star to whoever can google up the story. If I had to guess there may be several to choose from.

[Dru]

http://www.cbsnews.com/stories/2004/07/29/48hours/main632909.shtml

 

This one?

[DirtyHarry]

I'll get right on it

[catbirdseat]

http://www.cbsnews.com/stories/2004/07/29/48hours/main632909.shtml

 

This one?

Sounds like the one, but unfortunately no pictures. Well, maybe it was fortunate.

[Camilo]

Google images:

[snugtop]

There was a story on the TV about a woman who wanted to look like barbie and set out to do so through cosmetic surgery.

 

She's a mensa member, as I recall.

[sobo]

Dru – Firstly, only my son is from Vietnam, where we adopted him three years ago next month. My new daughter is from China, from whence we just returned with her last week. I don’t expect you or anyone else on this site to keep up on my family’s daily affairs, but if by chance you had come across the “So Happy I Want To Share It” thread in Spray over the past three months, then you would know that my new daughter was born in China. When you opined that North Americans adopting from China is some kind of “fad”, I took offense to that comment since my wife and I live in North America and we adopted our daughter from China. We met the criteria (that you set forth) for determining that adopting from China is a fad by your own admission. While you may not have explicitly stated that we were being trendy, your criteria and the fact that we meet those criteria categorically put us in what you described as a fad. I put two and two together and came up with four. Apparently, I added wrong. We did not do this thing in order to be trendy. My wife and I are not trendy people. Ask anyone who has climbed with me how old my gear is, or whether I wear shorts over polypro on glacier slogs or not, and what my hair/clothes/vehicle/etc. looks like, and the answer will become quite clear.

 

Secondly, minx said it better than I could in her first paragraph at the top of the page ^^, perhaps because she’s operating on a bit more sleep than I am right now, or perhaps because she's a better person than me. China is extremely popular with adoptive parents because the process is so structured and consistent. Every little detail has been thought out and tested, revised, and retested to the point that it’s basically like getting on a amusement park ride. You just pay a bunch of money, get in, shut up, hold on, and when the ride’s over, you get out with your kid. It was not at all that way when we adopted Nicholas from Vietnam three years ago. We didn’t even get him on the day we were supposed to. We thought we had dome something wrong in an earlier meeting with the orphanage director, or that we had somehow unwittingly violated some cultural taboo, of which there are many, and we weren’t even sure that we were ever going to see him again after that. It is not that way with China adoptions. So yes, China is popular with adoptive families precisely because of the predictability of the process, and that just makes good common sense for adoptive parents.

 

Thirdy, I agree with snugtop and her opinion. When people start adopting kids from a country just because some celebrity did it, then that constitutes a fad in my opinion.

 

Lastly, yes I did take your “fad” comment initially as an insult, whether it was intended as such or not, and for that I apologize. Why did I do that? Let me try to explain: Adoptive parents are constantly running into people who don’t understand that adopted kids are the same as biological kids in every way except genes. Are we as parents defensive about that? Yes, I guess you could say we are. Why? Let’s just say that we want to protect our kids from clueless individuals who don’t understand what might go through a young person’s mind when the term “adopted” keeps getting thrown around in conversations that are clearly centered about them. Children are insecure by nature. Orphans are even more so. There is no sense in subjecting them to additional insecurity when people start questioning their genealogy. I can’t tell you how many times in the past three years, when I’ve been out with my son, someone comes up to us and strikes up a conversation that ultimately ends up going something like this:

 

Them: “Wow, he’s a <cute/bright/smart/whatever attribute you want to insert> kid. Is he yours?”

Me: “Yes, he is.”

Them: “No, I mean, is he yours?”

Me: Yes, he is my son.”

 

A short pause… then,

Them: “Is your wife Asian?”

Me: “No, she’s Irish.”

Them: “Hmmm, he looks Asian.”

Me: “He was born in Vietnam.”

 

Most people wander off at this point, convinced that I am an asshole and am being deliberately obtuse about my son’s lineage. The nosey ones continue...

Them: “Could you not have kids of your own?”

Me: “He is my own. He was just born in Vietnam.”

Them: “So he’s adopted, right?”

Me: “As I said, he’s my son.”

 

I do not desire to distinguish for the sole benefit of strangers, in the presence of my son, that he is in some way different, “special”, or any less of a person because he is adopted. When my son is old enough to understand the concept of adoption, we will explain it to him. It will serve no purpose at this point in his life to try to explain to him that his birth parents did not want him or could not care for him. He will never know his birth parents. There is no information or records on them that would allow us, or him, to ever find them. The same can be said for our new daughter. One day, when they are older, we will take them back to the countries of their birth, and show them the heritage that is theirs. That is the best that we can do in regards to keeping them in touch with their origins, besides reading to them about their birthplaces. When Nicholas is troubled or feeling insecure, he asks us to tell him the story of how we came to Vietnam to “pick him up and bring him home.” It is his favorite story, it’s all true, and he loves every word of it.

 

I hope that this explanation has helped more than just a few readers understand... I will now step down from the soapbox.

[RocNoggin]

I scraped my Barbie's tits off on a brick walkway.

I hated her and I was jealous of her.

I think I still am.

 

LMAO! but just think, now you can buy a set of tits just as big and fake as Barbies! 8-)

[TREETOAD]

I have some friends that adopted a Chinese child and when that conversation comes up they explain to the person that they were traveling in china when they gave birth, that is usually followed by a long silent pause. Usually nothing more is said. My 15 year old son is a step son and I have never thought of him as anything different than my natural daughter. My wife and I have talked about adopting a child from Guatemala on many occasions and I can,t say for sure but I don,t think that I would feel any different about an adopted child either. I get what Dru is saying and I can see how in this twisted western kulture that adoption could easily become a trendy thing to do but I don,t think he was aiming it at sobo.

[Camilo]

There's no sense in getting too mad/offended at what people say just because they're ignorant. My older brother and I have a different biological father than my two younger brothers. We've never considered ourselves "step" brothers, but once somebody said "oh, you're their step brother?" It was really weird for me to hear this, but that's how people think. And indignant correction would've just made me come across as a hothead. A gentle correction just seems much better to me.

 

On that note, congrats on the new daughter Sobo! My coworker and his wife are at the end of the process and are looking to travel to China this summer sometime to pick up their daughter.

 

And, my mom was in Vietnam and ran into a French lady who had been in the country for 4 months getting the runaround trying to adopt a child

[selkirk]

Dru-- it's so obvious how thrilled sobo is to be able to become a parent again. there are lots of hurdles and problems with adoption, not the least of which is bureaucracy. any country that has a straight foward process for adopting a child will become a "popular" choice for prospective parents. that's good ol' common sense, not a fad.

 

imagine how insulting it would be to say to your neighbors that they were being trendy b/c they just had a child in the usual way. it's just as insulting to imply that Sobo and wife selected China for adoption b/c it's trendy. Personally, I would've bitch slapped you if you had told me I was being trendy when I had my son.

 

Read what I wrote.

I did not tell sobo he was being trendy. I said that there is apparently a fad for adopting Chinese kids. Which probabnly explains the creepy multiracial Barbie mother/daughter thing.

 

sobo adopted a Vietnamese kid. I did not say he was part of a fad. He, and you apparently, jumped to some weird conclusion.

 

So chill.

stfu bitch! regardless of what you meant, you're sounding like an asshole.

[Dechristo]

A Northern gets a Barbie

 

Barbie gets bondage

 

Barbie bout ta get a cap in da ho's azz

[knelson]

Dru - glad you said that and not me! Yowsa. However, I have to say that before I read your response, the same words formed in my head. And before someone jumps all over me...

 

Sobo - congrats and welcome home! Glad you made it out of there in one piece, and hopefully without any hitchhikers in your upper or lower GI tract.

 

I believe all the hubub revolves around folk's definition of "fad". Sobo and others - you're obviously taking fad to mean something trendy or disingenuous or done only to impress others. Granted, that's the normal definition, but fad could also be used to just note something that is only done for a certain amount of time. That what my personal definition was when the thought formed in my head. And that, is not demeaning to Sobo or any adopted kid. It just states what Dru also stated later - that China is where the majority of overseas adoptions are happening right now. And that will probably change, just as it has in the past.

 

I have a young daughter of my own, have a couple friends who have adopted from China, have an aquantance that adopted from Central America, and have a friend who is in the adoption process. So yes... I totally understand that an adopted kid is no different than a biological child, and even MORE importantly... that child sees you as THEIR MOM AND DAD - period.

 

But as Dru should probably have said - Americans adopting Chinese kids currently represent where it seems the majority of overseas adoptions are occuring . And as Seinfeld said "... NOT that there's anything wrong it!"

 

Congrats,

kurt

[Dechristo]

I'm up for adoption.

[Dru]

I wore black before it was trendy.