Jump to content

WHAT IT TAKES TO BE A LIBERAL


johnny_destiny

Recommended Posts

1. You have to believe the AIDS virus is spread by the lack of Federal funding.

 

2. You have to believe that the same teacher who can't teach 4th graders how to read is somehow qualified to teach the same kids about sex.

 

3. You have to believe that guns in the hands of law-abiding Americans are more of a threat than U.S. nuclear weapons technology in the hands of Chinese communists.

 

4. You have to believe that there was no art before Federal funding.

 

5. You have to believe that global temperatures are less affected by cyclical, documented changes in the earth's climate, and more affected by yuppies driving SUV's.

 

6. You have to believe that gender roles are artificial but being homosexual is natural.

 

7. You have to be against capital punishment but support abortion on demand.

 

8. You have to believe that businesses create oppression and governments create prosperity.

 

9. You have to believe that hunters don't care about nature, but looney activists who've never been outside Seattle do.

 

10. You have to believe that self-esteem is more important than actually doing something to earn it.

 

11. You have to believe that the military, not corrupt politicians, start wars.

 

12. You have to believe the NRA is bad because it supports certain parts of the Constitution, while the ACLU is good, because it supports certain parts of the Constitution.

 

13. You have to believe that taxes are too low, but ATM fees are too high.

 

14. You have to believe that Margaret Sanger and Gloria Steinem are more important to American history than Thomas Jefferson, General Robert E. Lee, or Thomas Edison.

 

15. You have to believe that standardized tests are racist, but racial quotas and set-asides aren't.

 

16. You have to believe Hillary Clinton is really a lady.

 

17. You have to believe that the only reason socialism hasn't worked anywhere it's been tried is because the right people haven't been in charge.

 

18. You have to believe conservatives telling the truth belong in jail, but a liar and a sex offender belongs in the White House.

 

19. You have to believe that homosexual parades displaying drag, transvestites and bestiality should be Constitutionally protected and manger scenes at Christmas should be illegal.

 

20. You have to believe that illegal Democratic party funding by the Chinese is somehow in the best interest of the United States.

 

21. You have to believe that anyone who beats you in an intellectual arguments is a bigot.

 

And finally...

 

22. You have to believe Richard Nixon obstructed justice by having an 18 1/2 minute gap in one tape of his recorded conversations and that it was an innocent mistake that one year's worth of Al Gore's e-mails got erased.

 

And, wouldn't you know that these e-mails of Al's just happen to be the ones subpoenaed by a White House committee and a federal grand jury in their continuing investigation of campaign finance abuses and other matters.

 

Bonus belief of a liberal:

 

23. You have to believe that it's better for a woman to be raped and murdered than for a rapist to be shot.

 

Believe all of the above, and THEN you will be a really good liberal

Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • Replies 109
  • Created
  • Last Reply

Top Posters In This Topic

Top Posters In This Topic

catbirdseat said:

Sphinx said:

Destiny, usually you're a clueless dumbfuck, that that was a fucking hilarious post. Keep up the good work. thumbs_up.gifthumbs_up.gifthumbs_up.gifthumbs_up.gifthumbs_up.gifthumbs_up.gif

Sphinx, Destiny remains a clueless dumbfuck. If he believes that tripe, then he really is.

 

CAT TURD, YOU SMOKING THE CONTENTS OF THE LITTER BOX AGAIN???

Link to comment
Share on other sites

1. You have to believe the AIDS virus is divine retribution.

 

2. You have to believe that the same teacher who teaches bible school on Sunday is most qualified to teach 4th graders about sex.

 

3. You have to believe that if we only had enough guns everyone would be safe.

 

4. You have to believe that art should be only for the rich.

 

5. You have to believe that if we come up with enough excuses to do nothing we can ignore global warming and sell more SUVs to get rich while millions go under the waves in Bangladesh.

 

6. You have to believe that women should be kept barefoot and pregnant and that homosexuals should get electroshock treatment.

 

7. You rather kill people after they have become criminals instead of prevent them from being born as unwanted children in the first place.

 

8. You have to believe that business will take care of you even as they export your job overseases.

 

9. You have to believe that if you can't shoot it, log it, or dam it ain't worth shit.

 

10. You have to believe that money will make you happy.

 

11. You have to believe that with a big enough military, you don't need diplomacy.

 

12. You have to believe the NRA is good because it supports certain parts of the Constitution, while the ACLU is bad, because it supports certain parts of the Constitution.

 

13. You have to believe that if you cut taxes for the wealthy enough the deficit will go away.

 

14. You have to believe that Milton J. Freedman, Henry Ford and John D. Rockafeller are more important to American history than Thomas Jefferson, Abraham Lincoln, or Albert Einstein.

 

15. You have to believe that "colored" races are poor because they are inferior and test scores prove it.

 

16. You have to believe the best way to keep the health insurance industry rich is to attack Hillary Clinton.

 

17. You have to believe that socialism hasn't worked anywhere it's been tried.

 

18. You have to believe liberals telling the truth belong in jail, but a liar and a coke head belongs in the White House.

 

19. You have to believe Christianity should be promoted by the government because "we were first", despite the fact that the Constitution forbids the favoring of one religion over another.

 

20. You have to believe that illegal Republican party funding by large corporations disguised as individual contributions is somehow in the best interest of the United States.

 

21. You have to believe that anyone who beats you in an intellectual arguments is a bigot.

 

And finally...

 

22. You have to believe Richard Nixon covering up a burglary was just a faux pas.

 

Bonus belief of a conservative:

 

23. If a woman is raped put the black man in jail for life. It doesn't matter what the DNA test says 15 years later.

 

Believe all of the above, and THEN you will be a really good conservative

 

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Fairweather said:

Catbird,

 

You still haven't shown any interest in explaining your claim (in a previous thread) that it was those evil republicans who approved the BP-Arco merger.

 

Just a friendly reminder, and an opportunity to explain a hollow claim.

 

And I haven't heard any conservative coherently explain: why we went to war in Iraq, Where the WMD are, and how tax cuts to the rich are helping the economy.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Off_White said:

I believe the phrase is "kid gloves," referring to dress gloves made from the skin of baby goats. Dressy and very soft, also difficult to clean, you'd want to take them off rather than get them all messed up in a fight.

 

i am sorry. i forgot that in your presence i must type absolutely perfectly. eat me ass clown the_finger.gif

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Fairweather said:

Butt out, Alpine Krust. I wasn't talking to your sorry arse. You're starting to sound a little bit like Mattp's lap-dog.

 

Besides, didn't you recently make it onto Trask's "good 'ole boy list"? I thought you were one of us now.

 

the_finger.gif

 

I'm a good old boy cause I'm obnoxious and proud of it(and my fleet of chain saws help too grin.gif); not cause I'm GW's lap dog.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Fairweather said:

Catbird,

 

You still haven't shown any interest in explaining your claim (in a previous thread) that it was those evil republicans who approved the BP-Arco merger.

 

Just a friendly reminder, and an opportunity to explain a hollow claim.

What is there to explain? Since you asked and I had a little time:

 

The FTC initially tried to quash the sale [link ] . After the two companies agreed to divest themselves of a number of ARCO holdings, the sale was approved. The holdings as far as I was able to ascertain did not include ARCO's west coast refineries link which were its most profitable components . The supporters of the merger figured opponents would be mollified by divestiture of crude oil supply elements and would not realize that it was refining that represented the critical point for gasoline production. The current rise in gasoline prices on the west coast is a result of the merger.

 

The merger was supported by the Republican led Alaska legislature link .

 

"Big Oil has made similar demands. Is it just a coincidence that Republicans and Big Oil share the same agenda? Public Citizen is concerned that massive campaign and soft money contributions by the oil & gas industry have been influencing national energy policy in ways that benefit Big Oil at the expense of consumers, workers, and the environment. For example, as shown in Table 7, Republicans running for federal office (excluding the race for president) have taken in $680,000 in Oil & Gas PAC contributions versus $180,000 for Democrats, while the Republican Party has collected $1.4 million in soft money contributions compared with $510,000 for Democrats), as compiled by the Center for Responsive Politics." link

 

 

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Yes, but final administration approval of the deal was required/made by whom?

 

Bill Clinton/Ron Brown. Democrats. Your original claim laid the blame for "all the big oil company mergers" exclusively at the feet of the republicans. I wonder who slept in The Lincoln Bedroom after that deal was consumated? Nice job on the Google search, by the way. Half an hour aint too bad.

 

 

Link to comment
Share on other sites

no doubt can you say delusions of grandeur? i would love to see the shocked look on their faces if they knew what their 'straight-edged,' 'tree huggers' were doin on their dime. a perfect example is al gore. can you deny this? or will you perpetuate the myth that he has done nothing wrong? if so, your naievity is as bad as those you lambast from you haughty liberal thrones. i think truthfully, that politicians are really all in this shit together and they made up this partisan crap so you retards would bicker about which side is better while both sider are running off with your money and your recources. dems are dook and repubs are piss. take your pick cause dinner is served. bigdrink.gif

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.

Guest
Reply to this topic...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Paste as plain text instead

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.




×
×
  • Create New...