gapertimmy Posted May 13, 2003 Posted May 13, 2003 This weekend will mark the first ever group of cc.com wankers to compete in the US Bank Pole Pedal Paddle here in lovely Bend Oregone. We have been training for the past 8 months in preperation for the competition. Our strict diet of gu injected horsecock has our bodies in the primest conditions of our collective lives, we should be a top runner to take 1st place. The Squad: Wife of Gaper, EarthBikeGay (lurker), Fejas, Sketchfest and myself we'll be mobbin down the hill saturday, and festivities will follow at chez gaper saturday evening. If anyone is planning on coming to smiffy tuff this weekend, please come join the fun saturday night. there will be plenty of pubes, hc, and beer for all. we might even be able to convince the puppies to perform a rendition of the infamous head humping incident. Quote
Fejas Posted May 15, 2003 Posted May 15, 2003 Don't forget the high intake of Irish car bombs to fill the body with plenty of carbs... Quote
sketchfest Posted May 15, 2003 Posted May 15, 2003 & has been my rigorous training regime since I volunteered for the grueling 22 mile downhill, road ride leg of this great event. I can only hope that my abilities do not let the team down. Quote
iain Posted May 15, 2003 Posted May 15, 2003 It would be priceless if you had two fat summer sausages in your waterbottle holders on the bike and two in hand like those adventure racers do for the running part Quote
iain Posted May 15, 2003 Posted May 15, 2003 the key for the bike leg is to get a corncob set of gears on the back and the biggest damn chainring you can find on the front. the only thing slowing you down on that leg is outspinning your gearing. Quote
gapertimmy Posted May 15, 2003 Author Posted May 15, 2003 oh yes iain, the 3' yard o beef from costco HAS been purchased, and will be worn on the back of each team member during their leg of the race. once fejas completes the 200 yard dash at the end, we will crack it open and share it with everyone in the beer garden. video footage will be shared.... Quote
chelle Posted May 15, 2003 Posted May 15, 2003 gapertimmy said: So Timmy, is that the t-shirt logo? Are you going to start selling them online? Quote
sk Posted May 15, 2003 Posted May 15, 2003 GOOD LUCK TEAM SNAFFLE I will be rooting for you from Eugene Quote
texplorer Posted May 16, 2003 Posted May 16, 2003 AP-Press Team Snafflehound came out of nowhere to win the coveted PPP race this year. Says one contestant from the 3 time champion team , " I was about to start the race and then I felt a sharp pain in the back of knee. It seemed I had been clubbed by a large cylindrical piece of sausage. When I turned around I saw someone running away with the word SPRAY and a chipmunk logo or something on their shirt." Later in the race most of the front runners were dumbfounded by a bizarre event of which has never been seen before. After reporting hearing strange music thousands of cat size furry animals came from out of the forest and gnawed contestants clothes right off of them. One team, Team Snaffle, seemed to be oblivious to the onslaught used the moment to take the lead which they did not relinquish for the rest of the race. Upon victory they were observed toasting beer and summer sausage and taunted the other teams with vulgar uses of their 2 foot long summer sausage celebration dance. Quote
gapertimmy Posted May 16, 2003 Author Posted May 16, 2003 fekkin classic tex! i'm going to be running in a pretty swanky costume, complete with a green cape with some choice wordage on it. last night.... i go to safeway to buy our clubcock, to make it interesting, i purchased teh 2' HC along with a box full of rubbers, and a large vat of vasoleine. it was the first time in bend that a grocery check out chick didn't say anything. Quote
erik Posted May 16, 2003 Posted May 16, 2003 gapertimmy said: fekkin classic tex! i'm going to be running in a pretty swanky costume, complete with a green cape with some choice wordage on it. last night.... i go to safeway to buy our clubcock, to make it interesting, i purchased teh 2' HC along with a box full of rubbers, and a large vat of vasoleine. it was the first time in bend that a grocery check out chick didn't say anything. i hope you got video of this action, to add to the historical documentry about team snufflehound. Quote
sketchfest Posted May 16, 2003 Posted May 16, 2003 Good thing you bought the jar of Vaso, cause the only way I'm gonna be able to carry that thing is if we grease it up REAL good and cram it up the leg of my ultra tight, one-piece spandex, aerodynamically crafted race suit Quote
gapertimmy Posted May 16, 2003 Author Posted May 16, 2003 i thought we were going to tape it to your helmet Quote
whirlwind Posted May 16, 2003 Posted May 16, 2003 sketchfest said: Good thing you bought the jar of Vaso, cause the only way I'm gonna be able to carry that thing is if we grease it up REAL good and cram it up the leg of my ultra tight, one-piece spandex, aerodynamically crafted race suit plentty of room up in there huh Quote
Szyjakowski Posted May 16, 2003 Posted May 16, 2003 TEXPLORER- you should write children's books!?! genius...fricken genius! Quote
sketchfest Posted May 16, 2003 Posted May 16, 2003 I'll be on the road in 1/2 hour, leaving shitville..er..I mean Wilsonville and heading to the ever gracious Timmy and Wife Becky's house. See ya all there Quote
Fejas Posted May 19, 2003 Posted May 19, 2003 We're waiting for our fearless leader to inlighten you all with his rendition of our epic adventure... beer and horsecock yeah... Quote
gapertimmy Posted May 19, 2003 Author Posted May 19, 2003 ohhh the scandal, and the lies!!!!! it was epic, ohhh yes it was, pictures and video footage will be ready soon. Quote
texplorer Posted May 19, 2003 Posted May 19, 2003 The African Snaffle says, "Roll that beautiful Snafflehound footage!" Quote
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