Necronomicon Posted April 2, 2003 Posted April 2, 2003 (edited) So, Jesus is hanging on the cross. The base of the cross is guarded by Roman Centurians, while a mob of suplicants wail away. Peter is in the mob, eyes streaming. Jesus(weakly, dying): "Peter...Peter..." Peter: "I'm coming my Lord!" He rushes the Centurians, only to be beat back mercilessly into the crowd. Jesus(weaker now): "Peter...Peter... Peter: "I'm coming my Lord!" Peter again rushes the Centurians, trying to get to the base of the cross that Jesus hangs from, and is again savagely beaten back into the crowd. Jesus(near death): "Peter...Peter..." Peter: "I'M COMING MY LORD!!" Peter rushes the Centurians a final time and breaks through! He stand beneath Jesus, his eyes pouring with tears, and looks towards his Lord. Peter: "Yes my Lord. I'm here my Lord." Jesus: "Peter...I can see your house from up here." Edited April 2, 2003 by Necronomicon Quote
Dru Posted April 2, 2003 Posted April 2, 2003 always look on the bright side of life (whistling) Quote
Necronomicon Posted April 2, 2003 Author Posted April 2, 2003 How come it's always "Climb4Christ" or "Surf4Christ" or "Ride4Christ" and never "TakeaCrap4Christ" or "WipeOutTheContinent'sIndigenousPopulation4Christ" or "KillMeUpSomeRagheads4Christ"? I never could figure that one out.... Quote
minx Posted April 2, 2003 Posted April 2, 2003 Necronomicon said: How come it's always "Climb4Christ" or "Surf4Christ" or "Ride4Christ" and never "TakeaCrap4Christ" or "WipeOutTheContinent'sIndigenousPopulation4Christ" or "KillMeUpSomeRagheads4Christ"? I never could figure that one out.... i know i'm gonna regret this but i'm cranky right now so i don't care: why is it anyactivitythatsomeshmoenjoysforchrist? Quote
Sphinx Posted April 2, 2003 Posted April 2, 2003 Necronomicon said: How come it's always "Climb4Christ" or "Surf4Christ" or "Ride4Christ" and never "TakeaCrap4Christ" or "WipeOutTheContinent'sIndigenousPopulation4Christ" or "KillMeUpSomeRagheads4Christ"? I never could figure that one out.... Quote
Winter Posted April 2, 2003 Posted April 2, 2003 christ rules. you'll all burn in hell. HELL I TELL YOU! muhahahahaha. Quote
specialed Posted April 2, 2003 Posted April 2, 2003 I must have missed that part of the bible where baby jesus tells the disciples to go out and crank V10. Maybe that was in the lost scriptures the Mormons ended up with and that's actually why they lit out for Utah: Maroni says there's splitter cracks and endless bouldering potential bro!! Baby Jesus seems like the quintisential Mountaineer though. Wherever he went he always had throngs of gapers following him and that ability to turn one fish and a loaf of bread into a huge feast would totally be usefull on the Sunday snow slogs up to Muir. Quote
minx Posted April 3, 2003 Posted April 3, 2003 i'm sure none of the millions of hindus, buddhists, muslims, etc are concerned what christ thinks about climbing. i'm pretty sure they don't think they're going to hell for not climbing4christ. and i'm really sure that if christ is a deity, that he doesn't give a rat's ass who's climbing what for him. Quote
Dru Posted April 3, 2003 Posted April 3, 2003 walking on water would be useful when ice climbing? also raising the dead. your partners could free solo and forget the helmet. Quote
minx Posted April 3, 2003 Posted April 3, 2003 Dru said: walking on water would be useful when ice climbing? also raising the dead. your partners could free solo and forget the helmet. so freesolo4christ? Quote
Dr_Flash_Amazing Posted April 3, 2003 Posted April 3, 2003 Only clean aiding, though, as mention of "nailing" is liable to stir up bad memories. Quote
specialed Posted April 3, 2003 Posted April 3, 2003 Boozing4Christ SmokingRope4Christ LookingAtNakedChicks4Christ BeatingTheDog4Christ GoingToDemolitionDerby4Christ EatingDeepFriedCrispityChrunchyThings4Christ Who says being religious isn't fun? Quote
specialed Posted April 3, 2003 Posted April 3, 2003 Dr_Flash_Amazing said: Only clean aiding, though, as mention of "nailing" is liable to stir up bad memories. Quote
Dru Posted April 3, 2003 Posted April 3, 2003 the Mountaineers can have a whole first aid class fixing your stigmata.... it wrecks your chalk bag though. Quote
Dru Posted April 3, 2003 Posted April 3, 2003 Necronomicon said: Centurians Those are the aliens from Star Trek right Quote
sexual_chocolate Posted April 3, 2003 Posted April 3, 2003 Hey, Climbers for Christ had a free spaghetti feed at Smith last weekend. Don't tell me you all missed it? Quote
Figger_Eight Posted April 3, 2003 Posted April 3, 2003 Dru said: walking on water would be useful when ice climbing? also raising the dead. your partners could free solo and forget the helmet. Don't forget turning water into wine. I think I'd prefer being able to turn water into Black Butte, though. Quote
JoshK Posted April 3, 2003 Posted April 3, 2003 Attention: 1/5 of the earth's population, minimum is going to hell. Yup, that's right. Any individual religion only makes up about 20% of earth's population, so that means whoever is "right", well, the other 4/5 of us are going to hell. It always cracks me up when my bible beater friends just "know" they are right about god, and it's not at all possible that the buddhist guy is really correct, or, gasp, that all of it is both equally right and wrong at the same time. Quote
Dr_Flash_Amazing Posted April 3, 2003 Posted April 3, 2003 Doesn't do much good to believe in something if you're gonna be half-assed about it. Quote
JoshK Posted April 3, 2003 Posted April 3, 2003 Dr_Flash_Amazing said: Doesn't do much good to believe in something if you're gonna be half-assed about it. Yes, but it's damn fun to run rings around the logically by pointing out that the buddhist guy and the jewish guy and the muslim guy are all just as damn sure of it as he is, and in their minds he is going somewhere bad. Quote
sexual_chocolate Posted April 3, 2003 Posted April 3, 2003 Buddha didn't believe in God. He didn't teach anyone to believe in one either. Nor did he teach them NOT to believe either, per se. Quote
Dru Posted April 3, 2003 Posted April 3, 2003 sexual_chocolate said: Buddha didn't believe in God. He didn't teach anyone to believe in one either. Nor did he teach them NOT to believe either, per se. Buddha didn't but a lot of Buddhists do. Quote
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