You perceive "arguing" where I experience "discussion". If it was an argument, it was the most civil I've seen here. I've exchanged PMs with parties involved and all reassured of each person's lack of receipt & intent of offense. Apparently, you received offense: a gift your judgment creates.
The discussion revolved around "honoring" those that have passed-on, NOT "how to properly mourn"...another pathology of your judgment.
By the tenor of your post and, particularly, the capital letters in your title, you treat "death" as it were a peculiar event when, in reality, it is the one sure thing we all have in common. I'm not aware of a cultural or CC.com ethic that discourages civil discussion of this topic with aims to honor the "recently deceased"; thread drift was averted by the exchange of the aforementioned PMs.
Get familiar with death, it will greet you in a moment. Until then, learn to enjoy the dance instead of posturing for a superior position against the wall.
And did you have to soil this thread with a confession of your lack of sexual prowess? How very inappropriate.