ivan

hippos - are you our celebrity hood accident of the month at the moment? hope not...

"The problem with most people's philosophies is they're dead" - Yossarian the Super-Cool Philosopher (and he never was alive, so therefore he's exempt from his own rule, so there!)

"it's a fool who looks for logic in the chambers of the human heart"

you wouldn't hit the baby-zombie jesus now would you, you mean little man - would you?!?

or you could just save yourself a lot of time and trouble and order a couple of pan-galactic gargle-blasters

my clown shoes are being resoled currently - if you wanna do wierdo trad stuff in trangos though i'm your boy

limes? if you wanna go fru-fru, how about blackberries? got plenty enough to fill your massive gourd growing right here in my own little patch of suburbia

my country isn't the same as my house - the washington monument doesn't have a dirty pair of drawers hanging off the top of it and the relecting pool doesn't smell like piss

jesus - where would you begin to get the amount of tequila required to prevent that frosty beverage from being hopelessly watery?

"why? why you do this to me, timmy?"

you're like a child that's just wandered into the conversation!

speaking of christians, i hear feminists hate sex?

a cable guy? I'm sorry you lost me on this post. lol feeling dumb all day for this discussion but this one takes the cake. obviously you're not a golfer

a cable guy?

interesting.... how much for tickets, for those like me too lazy to follow a damn inter-web link?

is that you queequeg?

be comfortable w/ the 1 axe/tool method if you're not protecting the climb at the step - the consequences of falling there are not necessarily lethal but likely incredibly painful - while soloing it myself i was momentarily very pissed at my dull-ass axe

pornographic pictures of elizabeth hurley - was gonna post one but i got, uh, distracted by my inspiration and stuff...

illumination's great for bivying and building caves - bring a saw, it's often super-icy

tauntaun?

jesus!

found it! if you look closely, you might be able to discern what sort of paper j.c.'s been plastered with the spear-stigmata work beautifully w/ red wine - really enhanced the effect

if i ever found the nodder i'd treat him just like martin scorsese

nothing wrong w/ making fun of retards, queers or catholics or any other group so long as everyone under the sun gets the same treatment - like the drill instructor from full metal jacket says - here you are all equally worthless that said, making fun of folks for the deliberate purpose of hurting them is lame, more so if they're incapable of defending themselves - but if we're to treat all folks equally, then either no one gets fucked w/, or everyone does - the trick is in the balance, in being the cheeky-fun-loving-asshole, not-the-fuck-your-sister-in-her-cornhole-and-tell-everyone-on-the-playground-about-it kind

man - where's a scanner when you need one? i have this fantastic black and white photo an amigo of mine took back in college - he and another heathen had crafted a nearly life-sized christ out of paper-mache and rigged it up so wine bladders could be fed into the back with the spout coming out of the stigmata - we hoisted him up on a huge cross in the front yard of our house and spent the weekend making friends w/ the neighbors - the thing was like a lightening rod - musta met a hundred cool folks who were walking down the street and had to join the hell-train. the picture is classic. j.c. looks sublimely pleased by the whole experience. the wine sucked though. don't know about christian climbers, but bivying w/ the big guy would rawk - no need to carry rations, just some fucking crumbs - you think he could turn the moss into chronic?