allthumbs Posted January 22, 2003 Posted January 22, 2003 A penguin was driving through the desert when his car broke down. So he waddled to the nearest phone to call AAA. His car was quickly towed to the nearest garage where the mechanic told him he would need a couple of hours to check out the car. The penguin, being a good natured bird, didn't complain but wandered off to find the closest supermarket. He really needed to cool down from all that heat too! He proceeded to the frozen foods section and hung out near the fish sticks. After an hour he got into the freezer next to the vanilla ice cream. He just couldn't help himself since it was his favorite flavor and so nice and cool... he ended up eating several gallons. Then he noticed the time so he waddled back to the garage covered in ice cream. The mechanic walked over to him wiping his hands and shaking his head saying, "It looks like you blew a seal." Blushing, the penguin said, "Oh no! It's just ice cream." Quote
schlangeschmecker Posted January 23, 2003 Posted January 23, 2003 I'VE ALWAYS LIKED THAT ONE. HEY TRASK, DO YOU REMEMBER BLOWING BUBBLES AS A CHILD? Quote
fleblebleb Posted January 23, 2003 Posted January 23, 2003 Heh, trask was a penguin not a child, it's autobiographical. It's totally revealing too, didn't the penguin climb into the freezer? Almost like ice climbing? Quote
catbirdseat Posted January 23, 2003 Posted January 23, 2003 That reminds me of the old parrot joke: Jimmy received a parrot for Christmas. The parrot was fully grown, with a very bad attitude and worse vocabulary. Every other word was an expletive; those that weren't expletives were, to say the least, rude. Jimmy tried to change the bird's attitude by constantly saying polite words, playing soft music... anything he could think of. Nothing worked. He yelled at the bird, and the bird got worse. He shook the bird, and the bird got madder and more rude. Finally, in a moment of desperation, Jimmy put the parrot in the freezer. For a few moments he heard the bird swearing, squawking, kicking and screaming and then, suddenly, there was absolute quiet. Jimmy was frightened that he might have actually hurt the bird, and quickly opened the freezer door. The parrot calmly stepped out onto Jimmy's extended arm and said, "I'm sorry that I offended you with my language and my actions, and I ask your forgiveness. I will endeavor to correct my behavior". Jimmy was astounded at the changes in the bird's attitude and was about to ask what had changed him, when the parrot continued, "May I ask what the Chicken did?" Quote
minx Posted January 23, 2003 Posted January 23, 2003 i'm scared. i heard this joke recently and i can't remember from whom. Do i know trask? oh the horror! Quote
allthumbs Posted January 23, 2003 Author Posted January 23, 2003 Do i know trask? oh the horror! - minx was it good for you too? Quote
minx Posted January 23, 2003 Posted January 23, 2003 must not have been since i don't really remember it Quote
allthumbs Posted January 23, 2003 Author Posted January 23, 2003 I stirred it with .... oh, nevermind. Quote
gregm Posted January 23, 2003 Posted January 23, 2003 you might be outta business soon trask: " Florida-based Drink Safe Technologies has produced a new way to help prevent date rape via the use of a coaster. The new test coasters boast the ability to detect two widely used date-rape drugs, gamma-hydroxybutyerate (GHB) and ketamine, within the contents of a drink. Within 30 seconds, a coaster dotted with a sample of the suspected beverage will turn a dark blue if tested positively for the debilitating drugs. College campuses, youth clubs and even bars are beginning to pass out these coasters nationwide. " Quote
Cpt.Caveman Posted January 23, 2003 Posted January 23, 2003 you might be outta business soon trask: " Florida-based Drink Safe Technologies has produced a new way to help prevent date rape via the use of a coaster. The new test coasters boast the ability to detect two widely used date-rape drugs, gamma-hydroxybutyerate (GHB) and ketamine, within the contents of a drink. Within 30 seconds, a coaster dotted with a sample of the suspected beverage will turn a dark blue if tested positively for the debilitating drugs. College campuses, youth clubs and even bars are beginning to pass out these coasters nationwide. " If it wasn't for that stuff trask would never have had an x-wife Quote
allthumbs Posted January 23, 2003 Author Posted January 23, 2003 You dudes are harsh. Be nice or you can't come to my BBQ. Quote
Dru Posted January 23, 2003 Posted January 23, 2003 Dude I told this same joke a week ago but it was a Newfie joke then not a Penguin joke !!! Joke thief! Quote
Cpt.Caveman Posted January 23, 2003 Posted January 23, 2003 someone actually married trask? so he says Quote
sk Posted January 23, 2003 Posted January 23, 2003 will someone wake me up when Minx stops talking out her ass? or something else noteworthy happens Quote
Dru Posted January 23, 2003 Posted January 23, 2003 will someone wake me up when Minx stops talking out her ass? or something else noteworthy happens She isnt talking out her ass, but standing on her hands actually. That explains the breath Quote
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