Sherri Posted January 16, 2008 Share Posted January 16, 2008 (edited) So ones I used for dying projects: That project is circling the drain. ....falling off the perch ...can't polish a turd ...is about as useful as perfume on a pig For a crazy co-worker I said that his cheese done slid off his cracker. They thought I was the crazy one. I dunno. Just "cultural differences" I suppose. That one about the cracker is the best yet! :lmao: I've always liked: He's a bubble off level. Or, He has a few 'roos loose in the top paddock. In Australia, for dying projects, we used to say: She's spat the dummy, mate. (A "dummy" is what they call a baby's pacifier.) Edited January 16, 2008 by Sherri Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
denalidave Posted January 16, 2008 Share Posted January 16, 2008 couple sandwiches short of a picnic Few beers short of a 6 pack. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
denalidave Posted January 16, 2008 Share Posted January 16, 2008 kevbone's as sharp as a bowlin' ball Sharp as a marble. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
denalidave Posted January 16, 2008 Share Posted January 16, 2008 "Excuse me, but I need to go to the restroom and take a Porter." (others call out) "Be sure to wipe your Tvashtarkatena." "And, give your Dechristo a shake." Shit or get off the pot. Time for a William Shatner. Dropping the kids off at the pool. Go lay some speed bumps. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RuMR Posted January 16, 2008 Share Posted January 16, 2008 time to grow a monkey's tail... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RuMR Posted January 16, 2008 Share Posted January 16, 2008 time to drop some french land mines... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
denalidave Posted January 16, 2008 Share Posted January 16, 2008 My mom is always mixing her metephors, like... 6 of one and half a bowl of roses. A stitch in time and one half dozen of the other. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
pink Posted January 16, 2008 Share Posted January 16, 2008 why don't you act like a tree and get the fuck out of here. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
KaskadskyjKozak Posted January 16, 2008 Share Posted January 16, 2008 why don't you act like a tree and get the fuck out of here. i like V7's: "act like a mime and STFU" Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
denalidave Posted January 16, 2008 Share Posted January 16, 2008 why don't you act like a tree and get the fuck out of here. Make like a baby and head out. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
selkirk Posted January 16, 2008 Share Posted January 16, 2008 One of the few compliments but so and so could, or did "turn a sow's ear into a silk purse" Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
pink Posted January 16, 2008 Share Posted January 16, 2008 why don't you act like a tree and get the fuck out of here. i like V7's: "act like a mime and STFU" Too dumb to pour piss out of a boot with instructions written on the heel. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lI1|1! Posted January 17, 2008 Share Posted January 17, 2008 dead batteries (or anything else dead) said to be "tits up" i thought it's make like a tree and leaf make like a hockey player and get the puck out of here on being complained to about a particularly stupid platoon mate: "i wasn't his parents and fucked" "every swinging richard" for everyone in the unit/group/etc high speed low drag for good soldiers low speed high drag for the other variety addressing new recruits variously as hero, hollywood, or cosmo Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ZimZam Posted January 17, 2008 Share Posted January 17, 2008 Put that in your juice box and suck on it. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sirwoofalot Posted January 17, 2008 Share Posted January 17, 2008 (edited) My Father always used, “you can’t pour piss from a boot reading the directions on the heel”. Edited January 17, 2008 by sirwoofalot Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
hafilax Posted January 17, 2008 Share Posted January 17, 2008 Off like a Jewish foreskin. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sirwoofalot Posted January 17, 2008 Share Posted January 17, 2008 i thought it's make like a tree and leaf make like a hockey player and get the puck out of here Make like donkey poop and hit the trail. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sirwoofalot Posted January 17, 2008 Share Posted January 17, 2008 i thought it's make like a tree and leaf make like a hockey player and get the puck out of here Make like donkey poop and hit the trail. Make like a bride’s pajama, and be off. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sirwoofalot Posted January 17, 2008 Share Posted January 17, 2008 Off like a Jewish foreskin. That's it. Off like a bride's pajama! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
pink Posted January 17, 2008 Share Posted January 17, 2008 My Father always used, “you can’t pour piss from a boot reading the directions on the heel”. that's a good one Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
hafilax Posted January 17, 2008 Share Posted January 17, 2008 The unit used in measuring scattering cross sections in Physics is the barn=10^(-24)cm^2. It was coined as a joke on "Couldn't hit the broadside of a barn". Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
denalidave Posted January 17, 2008 Share Posted January 17, 2008 Some men's way of describing certain women: She's a butterface, it all looks great, but her face. Good from a far but far from good. A double bagger. One for her head and one for yours in case hers rips. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
denalidave Posted January 17, 2008 Share Posted January 17, 2008 why don't you act like a tree and get the fuck out of here. i like V7's: "act like a mime and STFU" Too dumb to pour piss out of a boot with instructions written on the heel. Dumber than a box of rocks. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
catbirdseat Posted January 17, 2008 Share Posted January 17, 2008 Close enough for government work. Close enough for the girls I go with. Close enough for rock and roll. Let's make like a drum and beat it. Let's make like a tree and leave. Beats a sharp stick in the eye. Beats a swift kick in the teeth. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
marylou Posted January 17, 2008 Share Posted January 17, 2008 kevbone's as sharp as a bowlin' ball Sharp as a marble. This is irony here. A marble would be "sharper" than a bowling ball due to its smaller diameter. One thing we do at my work a lot: putting ten pounds of shit in a five pound bag Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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