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99 ways to torture your housecat!


layton

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I just found out a new way to torture the cat.

Put the fitted strechy cornered sheet (i know it has a special name) over the cat, thus trapping it between your sheets and the mattress. Watching it try to get out looks like a worm crawling under your skin. Hilarious! yellaf.gif

 

Any version of "dizzy kitty" is fun; putting the cat in a paper bag and spinning it, or on a spinning chair, then chasing it all over the house.

 

Putting balls of tape on it's paws while it does the jitterbug.

 

Putting a sock over it's head, making it look like a star wars character, as it blindly tries to navigate by your laughter.

 

Holding the cat just slightly above the ground so it can almost touch the floor is another good one.

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Thus the cycle of abuse continues. You're a funny/sick and sick/funny man michael. May your cats never decide you're worthy of their recompense.

 

It's not my cat.

 

I'm not sick. Sick would be fucking the cat, having it lick tuna water off your penis, or eating the cat. or all of the above in any order...

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Thus the cycle of abuse continues. You're a funny/sick and sick/funny man michael. May your cats never decide you're worthy of their recompense.

 

It's not my cat.

 

I'm not sick. Sick would be fucking the cat, having it lick tuna water off your penis, or eating the cat. or all of the above in any order...

 

I'm willing to bet there are, at least, a couple of psychotherapists out there willing to disagree with you on that. Then there's the whole issue of just because you haven't sinned (you haven't, right Mike?) doesn't mean sin doesn't dwell in your heart. But, since I'm not Catholic or anything, I'll leave that one for you to wrestle with.

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Thus the cycle of abuse continues. You're a funny/sick and sick/funny man michael. May your cats never decide you're worthy of their recompense.

 

I'm not sick. Sick would be fucking the cat, having it lick tuna water off your penis, or eating the cat. or all of the above in any order...

 

yelrotflmao.gifyelrotflmao.gifyelrotflmao.gif

 

Thank you for recalibrating my notion of sick Michael. Having a cat lick tuna water off your penis...? hellno3d.gif Now THAT'S sick (and freakin' hilarious)!

 

By the way, if you use the tuna in oil you get longer results. evils3d.gif

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