archenemy Posted August 31, 2005 Share Posted August 31, 2005 Actually, I have a very funny story about that. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Fonspa Posted August 31, 2005 Share Posted August 31, 2005 Lets hear it. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
archenemy Posted August 31, 2005 Share Posted August 31, 2005 o Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
archenemy Posted August 31, 2005 Share Posted August 31, 2005 k Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
olyclimber Posted August 31, 2005 Share Posted August 31, 2005 on the third day of my summer vacation Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
archenemy Posted August 31, 2005 Share Posted August 31, 2005 So, I am at a buddy's house, and there is a snaffle who had moved into the tree right beside the house. This tree supports the birdfeeder, but the birds don't want to come get their chow because the krewlskwerl won't share. Does this bug me? Nope. Why not? Because I don't really like birds all that much anyway. However, what does bug me is the fact that this friggen snaffle makes the most obnoxious noise whenever a hungry bird gets close to the tree. Actually, it sounds the alarm whenever anyone gets close to the tree. The tree is right by the deck, bbq, socializing area, etc; so it is impossible to avoid pissing of the noisy snafflespeaker. Does such a small-seeming irritation warrent a hunt? No, not really. Kinda. Maybe. But lemme tell ya what pushed me over the edge... That little bastard started squeeking, chirping, and sqawking at my dog. I am telling you that the little snafflebrat was threatening my dog (who, by the way, is only about 7lbs). I figured that was enough to justify a killing. I borrow a handy little .22 longrifle right then and there and shot the noisey little fucker right outta the tree. My buddy comes and looks over the edge of the deck and sees that the target is writhing in its last snafflethroes. Buddy walks into the house (a gentle soul intending to lessen the snafflesuffering) to get another bullet. I jump off the deck and hover over the snafflebody. My buddy comes back with a bullet in his hand and sees that I am standing with the barrel of the gun in my hand. I had just finished crushing the snafflebastard's head in with the butt of the gun. "Well, I guess that's more economical" says my buddy. "Yup", says I. Â Moral of the story: Never piss off white trash. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Fonspa Posted August 31, 2005 Share Posted August 31, 2005 Clint initiated this post. I think he has skwerl problems. Why hasn't anyone offered any constructive advice? Could it be that you are all unconcerned dickheads? May a thousand skwerls descend upon you and your posessions. Snide one liners won't solve the rat problems. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
archenemy Posted August 31, 2005 Share Posted August 31, 2005 No comment on my literary work? Â You thankless prick. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Squid Posted August 31, 2005 Share Posted August 31, 2005 (edited) I'm not so sure about all this speed-snaffle-sniping. Do you have verification? Who is this so-called 'friend'? These are serious questions that undermine your whole 'story.' Â Â Â edited to remove hideous grammar Edited August 31, 2005 by Squid Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
barjor Posted August 31, 2005 Share Posted August 31, 2005 Well my plans for hanging out outside your house in a tree at night are canceled. As long as they are not to loud I don't mind if they mess with the dogs. Keeps the dogs entertained. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Fonspa Posted August 31, 2005 Share Posted August 31, 2005 Thanks for sharing Arch. The damn things have no redeeming characteristics and that's a fact! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ireneo_Funes Posted August 31, 2005 Share Posted August 31, 2005 Some of you are going to be serial killers when you grow up, I'm afraid. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
archenemy Posted August 31, 2005 Share Posted August 31, 2005 Its only a hobby Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Fonspa Posted August 31, 2005 Share Posted August 31, 2005 A serial killer. That implies something monstrous. I don't even kill all the skwerls. I just thin out the over population so the remaining rats can live a happy life enjoying what is now abundancy. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kraken Posted September 1, 2005 Author Share Posted September 1, 2005 Props on your squirrel kill Arch. No mercy! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kitergal Posted September 1, 2005 Share Posted September 1, 2005 Arch...I would have never pegged you as one with a 7 lb dog. I always invisioned a 100+ pounder!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Fonspa Posted September 1, 2005 Share Posted September 1, 2005 Small dogs can be very tenacious. I used to be a mailman. That's how I refined my climbing skills. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sobo Posted September 1, 2005 Share Posted September 1, 2005 I wish they'd let mailmen/women refine their marksmenship skills on little yip-dogs instead... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
espirita Posted September 1, 2005 Share Posted September 1, 2005 Â I hate kickdogs. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sobo Posted September 1, 2005 Share Posted September 1, 2005 That's a good nickname for them. You can just drop-kick 'em into oncoming traffic. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
archenemy Posted September 1, 2005 Share Posted September 1, 2005 How original. Â Fortunately, I don't need a big dog. I am the biggest bitch you'll meet. No dog required. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sobo Posted September 1, 2005 Share Posted September 1, 2005 And a black, climbing bitch to boot! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
archenemy Posted September 1, 2005 Share Posted September 1, 2005 once you... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Fonspa Posted September 1, 2005 Share Posted September 1, 2005 I had an aunt in Texas. All her sisters called her "big dog". What do you suppose they meant? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dechristo Posted September 1, 2005 Share Posted September 1, 2005 maybe because she dined from a dish on the floor and drank from the toilet Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts
Join the conversation
You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.