G-spotter

Using a rope is a far better way to ensure it is destroyed than cutting it up.

8 foot rope sections? Couldn't they just get a dirtbag to make it into a rope rug?

Mark Chapman killed Lennon, but Yoko killed the Beatles.

HOW TO POOP AT WORK We've all been there but don't like to admit it. We've all kicked back in our cubicles and suddenly felt something brewing down below. As much as we try to convince ourselves otherwise, the WORKPOOP is inevitable. For those who hate pooping at work, following is the Survival Guide for taking a dump at work. CROP DUSTING When farting, you walk briskly around the office so the smell is not in your area and everyone else gets a whiff but doesn't know where it came from. Be careful when you do this. Do not stop until the full fart has been expelled. Walk an extra 30 feet to make sure the smell has left your pants. FLY BY The act of scouting out a bathroom before pooping. Walk in and check for other poopers. If there are others in the bathroom, leave and come back again. Be careful not to become a FREQUENT FLYER. People may become suspicious if they catch you constantly going into the bathroom. ESCAPEE A fart that slips out while taking a leak at the urinal or forcing a poop in a stall. This is usually accompanied by a sudden wave of embarrassment. If you release an escapee, do not acknowledge it. Pretend it did not happen. If you are standing next to the farter in the urinal, pretend you did not hear it. No one likes an escapee. It is uncomfortable for all involved. Making a joke or laughing makes both parties feel uneasy. JAILBREAK When forcing a poop, several farts slip out at a machine gun pace. This is usually a side effect of diarrhea or a hangover. If this should happen, do not panic. Remain in the stall until everyone has left the bathroom to spare everyone the awkwardness of what just occurred. COURTESY FLUSH The act of flushing the toilet the instant the poop hits the water. This reduces the amount of airtime the poop has to stink up the bathroom. This can help you avoid being caught doing the WALK OF SHAME. WALK OF SHAME Walking from the stall, to the sink, to the door after you have just stunk up the bathroom. This can be a very uncomfortable moment if someone walks in and busts you. As with farts, it is best to pretend that the smell does not exist. Can be avoided with the use of the COURTESY FLUSH. OUT OF THE CLOSET POOPER A colleague who poops at work and is damn proud of it. You will often see an Out Of The Closet Pooper enter the bathroom with a newspaper or magazine under his or her arm. Always look around the office for the Out The Closet Pooper before entering the bathroom. THE POOPING FRIENDS NETWORK (P.F.N) A group of co-workers who band together to ensure emergency pooping goes off without incident. This group can help you to monitor the whereabouts of Out Of The Closet Poopers, and identify SAFE HAVENS. SAFE HAVENS A seldom used bathroom somewhere in the building where you can least expect visitors. Try floors that are predominantly of the opposite sex. This will reduce the odds of a pooper of your sex entering the bathroom. TURD BURGLAR Someone who does not realize that you are in the stall and tries to force the door open. This is one of the most shocking and vulnerable moments that can occur when taking a poop at work. If this occurs, remain in the stall until the Turd Burglar leaves. This way you will avoid all uncomfortable eye contact. CAMO-COUGH A phony cough that alerts all new entrants into the bathroom that you are in a stall. This can be used to cover-up a WATERMELON, or to alert potential Turd Burglars. Very effective when used in conjunction with an ASTAIRE. ASTAIRE A subtle toe-tap that is used to alert potential Turd Burglars that you are in a stall. This will remove all doubt that the stall is occupied. If you hear an Astaire, leave the bathroom immediately so the pooper can poop in peace. WATERMELON A poop that creates a loud s plash when hitting the toilet water. This is also an embarrassing incident. If you feel a Watermelon coming on, create a diversion. See CAMO-COUGH. HAVANA OMELET A case of diarrhea that creates a series of loud splashes in the toilet water. Often accompanied by an Escapee. Try using a Camo-Cough with an Astaire. UNCLE TED A bathroom user who seems to linger around forever. Could spend extended lengths of time in front of the mirror or sitting on the pot. An Uncle Ted makes it difficult to relax while on the crapper, as you should always wait to poop when the bathroom is empty. This benefits you as well as the other bathroom attendees. Poop Well and Prosper!

It's 4:20 48 times a day around the world!

Cold

But butter isn't sweet.

Like MLUs and Tauntauns.

The glacier has a hard time being dangerous at its worst, and most of the time is a fluffy bunny.

What's love got to do with it?

The thicker the cushion the finer the pushin'

i would have to say the new Alpinelite 30's are way better than the old Genie and when my current Genie dies, I'll probably upgrade to one o' them.

Well - I said allegedly since it's a report in the news media. It was once reported on p3. of the Province newspaper that a climbing partner of mine was "hanging up his ice pick for good" after a rescue off Mt Currie. Since then I tend to disbelieve anything the non-climbing media reports. Recently, a guy I know was rescued off Harvey and the media reported he had two broken legs and other injuries when in fact he walked out of hospital the next day with none of those, just a hematoma. But I suspect this one might be a little closer to the truth than many.

Macabre route was climbed by Sheffield & Spagnut & should be in an old VOCJ. CAJ is not online - you have to get a DVD with all the issues on it. It used to be free to members but now I think they sell it for $25?

No, rockfall on a trad climb in El Potrero took Jose.

http://www.piquenewsmagazine.com/pique/index.php?cat=C_News&content=Sar+on+wedge+1532 Climber with broken leg allegedly abandoned on glacier by rest of party to wait for rescue. Not on K2, mind you - on the Wedge Gl. near Whistler.

That north buttress on Macabre has been done, 5.8 or 9 if i remember correctly, new Beckey guide should have details. Doug did you have access to the 1987 CAJ comparing the Fairley and Serl/Foweraker north buttress routes?

They went paperless (web-only) a couple years ago

Does ring any bells?

1. Nisleheim. 2. It looks like the better option would be to go the other way, from Wedge over to Gladsheim. You could drop down the headwall and climb the SE or SW ridge routes on Wedge to start. The north sides of the crest, out of Gwillim Creek, are glaciated/rubble and offer easier traversing than the ridge crest option.

Trip: Valhalla Range - 8 Days in Valhalla Date: 8/3/2008 Trip Report: Jesse, Graham and I spent 8 days based out of Mulvey Lake climbing and scrambling. we took a lot of gear, hoping to do a couple hard routes, but ended up climbing mostly easier stuff after some encounters with vegetated cracks on Gladsheim and recent rockfall scars on Asgard's south face. We climbed: Nisleheim east ridge, 4 pitches, 5.7 Asgard SE ridge, 3 pitches, 5.7 Gladsheim SW Face, variant to the Brown/Marcus, 5 pitches to 5.8 plus 400m of scrambling Midgard, north and south ridges, 3rd class Nott to Dag traverse, much scrambling and one rappel, rappel pitch TRed at 5.9 on return using rope left through anchor We got stormed on the last few days, otherwise, a great week. Snaffles are voracious at the bivi below Gmli S ridge, not so bad down by the lakes if care is taken to hang food. Plenty of goats and other critters around. 8 flavours of snafflehound are in situ: -bushy-tailed woodrat -marmot -Columbia ground squirrel -pika -regular red squirrel -shrew -mouse -chipmunk Bring a saw. We were trapped behind a fallen tree on the way out and had to chop through it with ice axes, a very slow and tedious job that blistered up my city-slicker keyboard-fondling hands but good. Some pics: Gear Notes: Full rack, most pieces not needed for the routes we did but we took'em anyways. Approach Notes: Bannock Burn road is 2wd. Bring a saw! 4 hrs to hike through Nisleheim-Gimli col and down to lakes. Bring crampons and ice axe for descent from col.

Have you ever noticed that roosters are all cock and no balls?

you're just making him more aroused

sadly i delete most of my bad photos now

"the hardest part about climbing Everest? getting 2 inches of dick through 8 inches of down!" - ed hillary