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Posted
I think people who have difficulty maintaining long term, monogamous relationships, or who have experienced particularly damaging relationships, view marriage with a great deal of skepticism and, in some cases, negativity. Long term monogomous relationships bring the greatest satisfaction for most people, however.

 

Dating positively blows. Anyone who claims to be satisfied with prolonged serial dating is lying to save face.

Having been in two long term relationships (one of them for 12 years), I feel that I am able to throw my opinion in on the whole long term vs dating pool of opinions.

I find both states satisfying at times and challenging at others. I've had relationships that break up cleanly and others that break my heart. And some shit I get over and other shit changes me as a human being. I am negative some days and other days I am all happy horseshit. Seems normal to me; but then, the insane person never questions their sanity, do they?

 

Good points, and at least you have perspective from multiple angles.

 

Just like those who are "happily dating", I don't know any "happily married" couple who claims 100% satisfaction- every relationship requires ongoing attention. I think most men stop paying attention because they think things are 'going well', but women always need to keep things moving along.

 

Damn neared every happily married couple I know, however, thinks with dread of the thought of being single again. Especially when you get older. Where would you start looking again? Trick question, actually, since "looking" is exactly when your least likely to meet anyone interesting. You meet people most compatible when you're relaxed and doing what you love in life( i.e. acting naturally), not when your standing in a room full of strangers pretending to be attractive.

 

Too many single people think that they will solve their problems entirely alone, and treat their relationships separately. This is neurotic. A good relationship effectively acts as a mirror in which you see the whole solution of your life. With no external input, you'll spend your entire life chasing your own tail.

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Posted

Christ, my last 10 posts have been completely tongue and cheek, and you wimynz are responding to them as if they're serious. WHAT THE FUCK IS UP WHICH YOU DEVOTCHKAS THIS MORNING? Frankly, I'm dissappointed in all of you. Very dissappointed. Spanking dissappointed, in fact.

Posted
Christ, my last 10 posts have been completely tongue and cheek, and you wimynz are responding to them as if they're serious. WHAT THE FUCK IS UP WHICH YOU DEVOTCHKAS THIS MORNING? Frankly, I'm dissappointed in all of you. Very dissappointed. Spanking dissappointed, in fact.
As well as being dissappointing.
Posted
With no external input, you'll spend your entire life chasing your own tail.

 

i like external input,

 

and i like my own tail.

 

now what?

Posted
Too many single people think that they will solve their problems entirely alone, and treat their relationships separately. This is neurotic. A good relationship effectively acts as a mirror in which you see the whole solution of your life. With no external input, you'll spend your entire life chasing your own tail.

 

I agree with this - romantic relationships (both good and bad)are the best teachers about oneself!

Posted

 

I found that marriage very much impacted my committment. I felt wholly different in that relationship than in any other. I just wish I could find a man who felt the same way. But then, I could wish in one hand and shit in the other and watch which one fills up first.

 

We're out there, but mostly taken.

 

Now it's time to cue up the whole "why are women always attracted to 'bad boys,' while ignoring the good ones, and then complain because their hearts are broken."

Posted
Christ, my last 10 posts have been completely tongue and cheek, and you wimynz are responding to them as if they're serious. WHAT THE FUCK IS UP WHICH YOU DEVOTCHKAS THIS MORNING? Frankly, I'm dissappointed in all of you. Very dissappointed. Spanking dissappointed, in fact.

 

hmmmm....

 

i definitely don't care what you're spanking this morning. and i'm sorry that its disappointing.

Posted

 

I found that marriage very much impacted my committment. I felt wholly different in that relationship than in any other. I just wish I could find a man who felt the same way. But then, I could wish in one hand and shit in the other and watch which one fills up first.

 

We're out there, but mostly taken.

 

 

OMFG, you ARE a little bitch! The pure, dripping conceit of this statement....are you originally from Colorado?

Posted
Christ, my last 10 posts have been completely tongue and cheek, and you wimynz are responding to them as if they're serious. WHAT THE FUCK IS UP WHICH YOU DEVOTCHKAS THIS MORNING? Frankly, I'm dissappointed in all of you. Very dissappointed. Spanking dissappointed, in fact.

 

hmmmm....

 

i definitely don't care what you're spanking this morning. and i'm sorry that its disappointing.

 

Well, I think he wants me to be his bitch, so he's hungry for action. Any takers to relieve his itch?

Posted
With no external input, you'll spend your entire life chasing your own tail.

 

i like external input,

 

and i like my own tail.

 

now what?

 

The first thought that came to mind reading this was:

 

"that's easy...go fuck yourself!"

 

..But I thought that might sound a bit rude. :lmao:

Posted

 

I found that marriage very much impacted my committment. I felt wholly different in that relationship than in any other. I just wish I could find a man who felt the same way. But then, I could wish in one hand and shit in the other and watch which one fills up first.

 

We're out there, but mostly taken.

 

 

OMFG, you ARE a little bitch! The pure, dripping conceit of this statement....are you originally from Colorado?

 

My tounge was firmly in cheek!

Posted

 

I found that marriage very much impacted my committment. I felt wholly different in that relationship than in any other. I just wish I could find a man who felt the same way. But then, I could wish in one hand and shit in the other and watch which one fills up first.

 

We're out there, but mostly taken.

 

Now it's time to cue up the whole "why are women always attracted to 'bad boys,' while ignoring the good ones, and then complain because their hearts are broken."

Oh please. We outgrow that phase just as men outgrow that "all that matters is her tits" phase.

I go for highly intelligent nerds who climb, ski, and listen to metal. Fortunately, I hear most of them are in the process of getting a divorce so they won't be "taken" much longer...

Posted

OK, devotchkas, you want some advice from Old Spanky about cheaters? No? Tough shit, here it is anyway.

 

When you're 'getting serious' with a guy, let him know calmly but in no uncertain terms that you need monogamy (and why you need it), and let him know that you'll walk, immmediately, without negotiation, no second tries, if he doesn't follow through on that. If they guy's a playa, he'll probably opt out...too much trouble. If the guy's a fringe playa, one who tries to get away with as much as he can while maintaining a positive image to the rest of the world, he'll think twice about continuing the relationship. If the guy's cheated before but reformed and likes you, he'll likely comply. If the guy's never cheated...wait, that's impossible.

Posted
I go for highly intelligent nerds who climb, ski, and listen to metal. Fortunately, I hear most of them are in the process of getting a divorce so they won't be "taken" much longer...

:lmao:

:lmao:

 

OMG - me too!!!! Except for the metal part. Watch that whole "process" though...jeez...that's why I'm so bitter - the guy I was seeing told me he was divorced when he was only separated and ended up going back to his wife! What's the rule? They have to be divorced at least a year before they're datable? Next time I'm asking to see the piece of paper showing it's final!

 

 

 

 

 

Posted
OK, devotchkas, you want some advice from Old Spanky about cheaters? No? Tough shit, here it is anyway.

 

When you're 'getting serious' with a guy, let him know calmly but in no uncertain terms that you need monogamy (and why you need it), and let him know that you'll walk, immmediately, without negotiation, no second tries, if he doesn't follow through on that. If they guy's a playa, he'll probably opt out...too much trouble. If the guy's a fringe playa, one who tries to get away with as much as he can while maintaining a positive image to the rest of the world, he'll think twice about continuing the relationship. If the guy's cheated before but reformed and likes you, he'll likely comply. If the guy's never cheated...wait, that's impossible.

 

uhh...gotta disagree on that one...i for one, haven't cheated...

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