Cool Suunto Watch

[G-spotter]

Cause that's expedition style, which Twight says is lame.

 

[olyclimber]

If you brought a cow along, it could easily house a team of 4 climbers in its stomachs. Cows should be mandatory, plus they can double as a MRE and a snow anchor. You are an IDIOT if you venture above the treeline without one, and I'M NOT GOING TO PAY FOR SEARCH AND RESCUE IF YOU DO. Amatuers!

[Dechristo]

cow-monger

[G-spotter]

If you brought a cow along, it could easily house a team of 4 climbers in its stomachs. Cows should be mandatory, plus they can double as a MRE and a snow anchor. You are an IDIOT if you venture above the treeline without one, and I'M NOT GOING TO PAY FOR SEARCH AND RESCUE IF YOU DO. Amatuers!

 

according to the Swedish Creation Science Institute, gods are made of cow milk and ice:

 

Niflheim, Muspellheim and Surt

In the midst of space, at the beginning of time, there existed a great void known as Gunninga-Gap. To the north of the gap lies a dark, cold realm covered in ice and snow, known as Niflheim. At the heart of this realm lies the spring Hvergelmir, which is the source of the eleven rivers, collectively known as the Elivagar. To the south of the gap lies the realm of fire, Muspellheim, a land of warmth and brightness. Due to the intense heat of this realm, the only beings able to survive there were those native to the land. On the furthest reaches of this realm lives the fire-giant, Surt. With his flaming sword, he guards the realm and waits for the end of the world when he will rise up and battle the Gods and cover the earth with fire.

Ymir and Audhumla

The waters of the Elivagar flowed south into the gap, as the mist of the falling water met the cold air of the northern edge of the gap it formed into rime. Over time the rime continued to build and fill the gap. As the warm air from southern edge of the gap, met the rime, the rime began to melt. From the melting water the frost-giant, Ymir was formed.

 

As the rime continued to melt the cow Audhumla was formed. From her teats flowed four rivers of milk, which the giant Ymir used to feed himself. Ymir, having been satisfied with nourishment from the milk, fell into a sleep. As Ymir slept, he began to sweat. From the sweat of his armpits he bore a son and daughter, and from his feet the six-headed giant Thrudgelmir was born. Thrudgelmir begot a son Bergelmir, from whom the entire race of frost-giants are descended.

Odin, Vili and Vé

As Ymir slept, Audhumla began to lick the salty rime for nourishment of her own. After the first day, the hair of a god began to appear, after two days, his head appeared, after three days, the god Buri emerged from the ice.

 

Buri mated and begot a son named Bor. Bor took for a wife, the frost-giant Bestla, a daughter of Bolthor. Through this union, Bestla bore three sons: the first was Odin, the second Vili and the third Vé.

 

When Thrudgelmir and Bergelmir heard of the existence of Bor's sons, they enlisted the help of the other giants to try and kill them. Though the gods were few, they were very b and their wounds healed quickly, thus they were unable to die. However, the giants suffered and died at the hands of the gods, but continued to produce offspring to replace those that died. The war between the gods and the giants continued for many, many years at the bottom of Gunninga-gap.

The Creation of the World

Eventually Odin, Vili and Vé slew the ancient giant Ymir. So much blood flowed from Ymir's wounds, and so quickly, that nearly the entire race of frost-giants was drowned. The only surviving members of the race were Bergelmir and his wife. They managed to escape the flood by climbing into their ark and sailing to the world. The couple settled and named the new land Jotunheim, where a new race of frost-giants was born. This new race of giants continued their dislike of the gods and continued their fued.

 

After slaying the Giant, the three brothers carried the body to the very center of Gunninga-Gap. Here they fashioned the earth, Midgard, out his body. His flesh was formed into the earth; his unbroken bones into the mountains; his jaws, shattered bones and teeth were formed into boulders and stones; his hair the trees and vegetation; his blood formed the lakes and the sea surrounding the earth.

 

If I brought a cöw to Mt Hood, do you think there would be a real risk of creating some Norse gods? I wouldn't want them to get in a fight with SAR.

[tvashtarkatena]

I was on an expedition where we hauled a large crock pot, burner, and 2 gallons of oil to the summit of Hood, where we deep fried a small turkey and offered it to other climbers as they summited. Part of a 40th birthday party.

 

Unfortunately, we ran into a semi conscious guy who'd been struck in the chest by a basketball sized rock, and had to call in a helicopter rescue.

 

He did not want any turkey.

[Cobra_Commander]

Did the helo short-haul in a SAR crockpot (swathed in reflective tape, six 1" webbing sausages hanging down, 18 mirror-polished locking carabiners, weighs twice as much as necessary)?

[olyclimber]

Clearly it all could have been prevented if they had brought a cow.

But what about the maps of mount hood? where do i get one of those?

[olyclimber]

I was on an expedition where we hauled a large crock pot, burner, and 2 gallons of oil to the summit of Hood, where we deep fried a small turkey and offered it to other climbers as they summited. Part of a 40th birthday party.

 

Unfortunately, we ran into a semi conscious guy who'd been struck in the chest by a basketball sized rock, and had to call in a helicopter rescue.

 

He did not want any turkey.

 

Did you fix ropes? Its not really a climbing if you fix ropes. Climbing is being dumbed down, and you aren't really climbing if you use fixed ropes.

[Cobra_Commander]

it would be a good community service to list what is needed to climb to the summit. so far we have:

 

icepick

crockpot

tauntaun (cow may be acceptable in a pinch, but not sure)

map (unknown where to get these. maybe there is a map to where they are)

watch (doesn't really matter which one, but it must be as big as a wallclock)

MLU, PLB, MRE, COW (really any 3-letter thing)

a full iron spit is useful for the impromptu turkey cookoff.

[G-spotter]

JORB?

[olyclimber]

A cellphone for calling mom before anything happens and to pre-notify SAR that you are climbing rockface and ice which is technical and will require rescue.

[Cobra_Commander]

ack, all bets are off if there's rockface.

 

JOOREEOEEERRB

[tvashtarkatena]

I was on an expedition where we hauled a large crock pot, burner, and 2 gallons of oil to the summit of Hood, where we deep fried a small turkey and offered it to other climbers as they summited. Part of a 40th birthday party.

 

Unfortunately, we ran into a semi conscious guy who'd been struck in the chest by a basketball sized rock, and had to call in a helicopter rescue.

 

He did not want any turkey.

 

Did you fix ropes? Its not really a climbing if you fix ropes. Climbing is being dumbed down, and you aren't really climbing if you use fixed ropes.

 

No fixed ropes, but our equipment list included a snowcat, two six packs of Deschutes, a bong, and a one gallon propane tank.

 

Definitely expedition style.

[Dechristo]

you must have someone in your party that grew-up on a gazillion acre ranch and ate (or played) possum as a child. or, in lieu of this, learned survival skills on a scout ranch.

[counterfeitfake]

FWA

 

First Watchless Ascent

[joblo7]

f woman's ass . for you. pd

[wfinley]

http://www.tonmo.com

 

Where do you find these links?

 

[joblo7]

that shit equalizes like a mawfoker. uuummmmm bivysack...

 

beats a tauntaun anyday.

[tvashtarkatena]

you must have someone in your party that grew-up on a gazillion acre ranch and ate (or played) possum as a child. or, in lieu of this, learned survival skills on a scout ranch.

 

Hood kills. Don't even joke about not taking enough equipment up there.

[joblo7]

my kid has a suunto and he fuckin checks it every 10m so he knows exactly when to get ams.