EWolfe Posted January 10, 2004 Share Posted January 10, 2004 Link Top Ten Questions To Ask Yourself Before Hiking Naked 10. "Do I have a long enough walking stick?" 9. "Should I have hired an experienced nude trail guide?" 8. "Does it still count as nude hiking if I'm wearing lip balm?" 7. "Will I have to serve my jail term naked?" 6. "Are there safer ways to embarrass my family and friends?" 5. "Were do I keep my water bottle?" 4. "Will I be pitching a tent?" 3. "How would poison ivy affect my sex life?" 2. "What are the chances I'll come home with an assful of thorns?" 1. "Whats wrong with me?" Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dan_Harris Posted January 10, 2004 Share Posted January 10, 2004 Cool site. Top Ten Things The Founding Fathers Would Say If They Were Alive Today 10. "Remember that electoral college thing we made up when we were drunk? They're still using it!" 9. "Maybe that ruthless monarchy thing in England wasn't such a bad idea after all..." 8. "Good to see Florida is still using the same old voting machines" 7. "That's odd -- in my day, we also had a senator named Strom Thurmond" 6. "So that's the Washington Monument? Yeah, in his dreams" 5. "Giuliani has really wrecked Times Square" 4. "We risk our lives to form this great nation and you wanna let George W. Bush run it?!" 3. "Back in our time there certainly wasn't anyone as man-tastic as Ricky Martin" 2. "He did what in the Oval Office?" 1. "Screw this, we're going to Canada" Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
whirlwind Posted January 10, 2004 Share Posted January 10, 2004 i think number 1 would actually be; "dam this shit potient, back in my time..wait what where we talking about?" Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lummox Posted January 10, 2004 Share Posted January 10, 2004 free stephen gough! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
girlclimber Posted January 10, 2004 Share Posted January 10, 2004 lol excellent link Top Ten Ways To Make Soccer More Exciting To Americans 10. Foreign countries play for the right to nuke each other. 9. Every five seconds, goal or no goal, have that nutty Spanish guy scream, "Goooooaaaallll!" 8. Use clever ad slogans like, "Soccer--You'll Get a Kick Out of It!" 7. Stop bein' a bunch of old ladies and let 'em use their hands, for God's sake. 6. Add four bases, a ball and a bat like a real damn sport! 5. Get all them damn foreigners off the field. 4. How 'bout some cars gettin' smashed up real good? 3. Lewinsky! 2. Replace ref with Jerry Springer and let the fun begin. 1. Less corner kicking, more coach-kicking. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dave_Schuldt Posted January 10, 2004 Share Posted January 10, 2004 That's some funny shit!!!!! 10. Wearing special "anti-terror" hat 24/7 9. Adding seat belts to dining room chairs 8. Wearing same cologne as Tom Ridge 7. Building a tolerance to radiation by standing in front of the microwave 6. Interrogating pets 5. Watching a lot of them "Lethal Weapon" movies 4. Stocking up on Tums 3. Just to be safe, getting vaccinated for small and large pox 2. Creating elaborate color-code systems to alert citizens to threat levels 1. Taping a duck See my auto sig below. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mos_Chillin Posted January 10, 2004 Share Posted January 10, 2004 Top Ten Things We Learned From The Mars Rover 10. Contrary to earlier findings, Mars only about a mile from Earth 9. NASA's Mars footage looks suspiciously similar to Atari's Asteroids 8. So far, no sign of Mork 7. Thought I saw Paris Hilton having sex with a Martian 6. We could've taken a photo of Death Valley and saved 400-million dollars 5. The Mars invasion force is already on its way and there's not a damn thing we can do about it 4. It's much more Mars-y than we even imagined 3. Whole "red planet" thing just a marketing ploy by Cherry 7-Up 2. Kucinich's popularity rating on Mars is the same as on Earth 1. Osama ain't there, either Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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