tvashtarkatena

Yo mama's bumper sticker says "Honk if you love Cheez-wiz"

Yo mama so fat when she drives into town and back it's uphill both ways.

Yo mama so fat last time she swam in the Atlantic Florida disappeared.

Yo mama make Angelina Jolie's lips look skinny.

The degree to which you want to show me your privates must be congenital.

Yo mama so fat Evil Knievel couldn't jump her cleavage.

I'd like to take this opportunity to thank all the humble garbage men and single working moms who, with their taxes, subsidized all the drugs I took during my privileged private university education.

We angry, hysterical, un-moderated, unchallenged, old, self-promoting, hypocritical, knowledge obscurus displaying, injustice lamenting, 4 Runner driving, soccer mom hating, humble garbage men trashing, pointless pursuit chasing, materialistic, subsidized, lecturing, anti-capitalist, anti-American, privileged, yacht owning, land speculating, drug abusing, web surfing, work skipping, network executive persecuting, lily-white, private university educated metro males will miss you.

Yo mama so fat she got Pavarotti an' da Michelin Man fightin' ovah her.

Yo mama got more spare tires than a Mexican taxi.

Yo mama so fat she got church pews in her Caddy.

Moderated highs in the K-12 faculty, new lows almost daily. Increasing chance of self-promotion, unbridled anger, hysteria, and unchallenged presidential death threats. Possible flight delays for 747-300s chasing pointless persuits. Lilly white-outs likely. Morning knowledge obscurus cover, followed by higher degrees on display in leiu of genitalia. Land speculating yacht owner advisory. Hypocrisy level: amazing. Chance of gleefully singing the praises of prosecuting Karl Rove without evidence: 99%-to-100%. Surf report: direct and unrefined swells that will challenge everyone from the poor of Venezuela to network executives. Future chance of measureable participation: 100%. This fairweather report brought to you by private university edu-snobberated metro-males subsidized by humble garbage men, with charitable contributions from single working SUV driving soccer moms.

Yo mama so fat, she got to drive her lunchbox to work.

Yo mama so fat that, last time she did the chicken dance, she got humped by an elephant lion.

Yo mama so fat she gotta rotating restaurant on her ass.

Yo mama so fat, she don't use tampons, she uses futons.

Yo mama so fat, she gittin' death threats from the Macaw tribe.

Yo mama so fat, she don't call da po-lice, she calls Greenpeace.

Yo mama so fat, she got a prescription for gravitational lenses.

Yo mama so fat, she weighs herself on a Richter scale.

So let's crucify him already.

Wait...you want me to post a display of my genitalia?

Did Lindsay Lohan get a hold of FW's password? Oh my!

Yo mama so fat that she got direct rail freight service to her fridge.

Yo mama so fat that we she go out to eat McDonald's stock price doubles.