ivan Posted October 14, 2012 Share Posted October 14, 2012 Trip: Lacamas Pinnacle - Fortress of Crapitude Date: 10/11/2012 Trip Report: don't know how that fine feller mr olson makes money off his books, as he always seems to be giving me copies for free - was thumbing through his latest, "oregon rock," the other day and was surprised to see a crag here in camas - foreswore the last fine day at beacon before fall come fucksading down and teamed up w/ mr miker to check it out after work ole'boy'olson didn't exactly get my hopes up high, and for that i thank him, but jesus christ, it was even worse than hoped for - "desperately small" he describes it, but "tragically tiny china-cock" woulda been more the thing long rumble over gravel, o'er hill n' dale n' heath and devastated forest - the red devil in dire danger of busting out its bottom and being left to rot in the big ruin of the jones creek area - eventually we got to it - holy shit, i've taken a few dumps bigger than this dismal thing! solid enough rock, and kudos to the poor soul who set themself to clean it - the rock might be small, but the bolts are big like bog an approach of all of 100 yards, but good luck figuring how to get up the trail-less and wicked steep sand bank above the road-cut - the prevalence of prickly brambles and char-coaled logs hardly helpful... not that the ambiance of a clear cut can be much diminished, but holy-fuck, the sound of the countryside there is the spitting image of rural somali, and not in a decent way - half a dozen crackers all along the hills w/ semi-automatic rifles, blazing away at the demons in their banal day-dreams - practically any second i figured to hear the High Whine of In-Coming! we clambered all over that fucker and quickly figured we'd brought way too little beer to make this thing bearable - most "routes" not more than a dozen feet tall - you can sample all there is to be had there in half the time it takes to make the drive the far ridgeline's got a road and maybe a better crag, but the roar of the ambuscade there augers poorly for any fellow who steps over w/ anything less than a smith n' wesson strapped cavalcade - You Have Been Warned. we left w/ the Hardly Sated feeling of a man who's got a hand-job from a toothless-midget missing most of her fingers and bombed down the blown-out landscape in search of a True Drunk good enough to wash away the memory of a misspent afternoon - sigh....i don't blame anyone, just me. Gear Notes: drugs - lots of drugs, might make it better - shit, practically would explain the origin i'll warrant - you might consider bringing your own boulders to beef up what you find Approach Notes: good enough explanation in oregon rock, but i'd just as well recommend blotting the whole page out! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
matt_warfield Posted October 14, 2012 Share Posted October 14, 2012 You forgot to mention that the midget should have a flat head so you have a place to put your beer while the action takes place. I also really regret visiting places that are disappointing. My formula is if I drive more than I climb there is something wrong. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CaleHoopes Posted October 14, 2012 Share Posted October 14, 2012 Ivan, you probably don't know it... but your trip reports are almost as good as The Angry Hiker from nwhikers.net. You could use with a little more craptastic drawings though. That would add to the ambiance of the suckage. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ivan Posted October 14, 2012 Author Share Posted October 14, 2012 i avoid hiking as much as possible - hiking threatens to kill this sweet beer-gut i've been working on for the past 2 decades Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
billcoe Posted October 14, 2012 Share Posted October 14, 2012 solid enough rock, and kudos to the poor soul who set themself to clean it - the rock might be small, but the bolts are big like bog LOL. You're welcome. BTW, I'd been told that the pinnacle was over 100' tall which served to suck me in quite readily. My first words as we came around the corner up from Jones creek were: "Where's the rest of it". LOL I did go back once. Had part of a day and drug Gent Mendes (awesome guy to hang out with) back up there and we did this west side route. Note that the bouldering over towards where your photo was taken is reportedly quite good. Tymon blogs about it all the time. I've never shot or climbed over there, but both are evidently quite popular. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ivan Posted October 14, 2012 Author Share Posted October 14, 2012 color me surprised old bill! so next you gotta head-lock some boy scout into going back and actually putting in a trail just above the road - fucksakes, in flip-flops and w/ a full haulbag (i was too lazy to repack) it took me at least 5 minutes to figure out how to climb the first 15 feet! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
christophbenells Posted October 14, 2012 Share Posted October 14, 2012 (edited) i would recommend the chimney rock area outlined on the page before lacamas pinnacle. its a 3 mile hike or so but its tall enough, has some grainy granitic stuff and has some cool routes. the north side cracks are cool and tree frog looks dope! Edited October 14, 2012 by christophbenells Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Alex Posted October 16, 2012 Share Posted October 16, 2012 it really blows my mind that anyone would bother to "develop" that.... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ivan Posted October 16, 2012 Author Share Posted October 16, 2012 we don't have any fabulous renton granite in these parts Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CaleHoopes Posted October 16, 2012 Share Posted October 16, 2012 isn't the drytooling area on 900 ALMOST renton granite? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
christophbenells Posted October 18, 2012 Share Posted October 18, 2012 we don't have any fabulous renton granite in these parts im no geologist but i did study it college level for a bit, olsen calls it aplite, which is intrusive and similar to granite. maybe you are referring to an inside joke that im not privvy to Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
beaconben Posted October 19, 2012 Share Posted October 19, 2012 :lmao: Love your TRs Ivan. Hilarious read every time. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
stevetimetravlr Posted November 7, 2012 Share Posted November 7, 2012 Renton granite? Theres a old quarry that I learned to climb on on the Issaquah-Renton Road, and I understand that folks now use it to dry tool on because its such a crumbling pile. But to us, it was a big crag. Renton granite is right, stand proud, lots of history at that place! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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