kevbone Posted July 21, 2008 Posted July 21, 2008 Yesterday I was at the video store renting a couple of movies and I saw blatant child abuse from a dad to his 5 or 6 year old son. It was horrifying and quite frankly I did not know what to do…..or if I could really do anything. The dad kept telling the child to be quite and pinching his right shoulder (right where the neck connects to the shoulder, at a pressure point) to the point that the child was yelling for him to stop, when he did stop the child cried louder and kept grabbing his should telling his dad that he hurt him. The child was in visible pain from the pinching. The dad did it at least 5 times while in the isle next to me. I had to hold me ears so as to not hear the child cry. It was horrible to watch. I wanted to walk up the dad and pick a fight or something……or follow him home and report him to the authorities. I have seen parents pull there kids ears before but this was way worse. It was like watching someone casually put salt on an open wound. I could tell this must happen frequently in the kid’s home life. The dad was so casual about it. It made me sick to my stomach. What to do in these circumstances? Quote
RuMR Posted July 21, 2008 Posted July 21, 2008 doesn't sound any worse than my dad when i was acting like a tool... Quote
kevbone Posted July 21, 2008 Author Posted July 21, 2008 Problem is this kid was not acting like a tool. Looked to me like the dad had no patience and has no business being a father. Hurting your children "ever for any reason" is not acceptable. Quote
RuMR Posted July 21, 2008 Posted July 21, 2008 not acceptable in your book...there are many shades of black and white... Quote
kevbone Posted July 21, 2008 Author Posted July 21, 2008 That’s right. Purposely inflicting pain on your children is wrong in my book. Now back to the topic at hand. Rumr….what if the dad was standing over the 6 year old and slapping him across the face over and over and over…..are you going to defend the dad? I see no difference in what I saw and what I just described. The question is….what to do in situation in public where the father or mother is being inappropriate? Quote
KaskadskyjKozak Posted July 21, 2008 Posted July 21, 2008 That’s right. Purposely inflicting pain on your children is wrong in my book. Now back to the topic at hand. Rumr….what if the dad was standing over the 6 year old and slapping him across the face over and over and over…..are you going to defend the dad? I see no difference in what I saw and what I just described. The question is….what to do in situation in public where the father or mother is being inappropriate? What about those parents who do nothing? Kid is whining/misbehaving/acting like an idiot and the parents/oblivions stand there and do nothing. That's how I imagine you boner based on your past thoughts on "disciplining". When should someone "step in" and "correct" that type of parenting? Quote
kevbone Posted July 21, 2008 Author Posted July 21, 2008 What about those parents who do nothing? Kid is whining/misbehaving/acting like an idiot and the parents/oblivions stand there and do nothing. Are you going to start a thread now called "parent abuse"....give it a rest. Quote
KaskadskyjKozak Posted July 21, 2008 Posted July 21, 2008 What about those parents who do nothing? Kid is whining/misbehaving/acting like an idiot and the parents/oblivions stand there and do nothing. Are you going to start a thread now called "parent abuse"....give it a rest. you started that thread already. I doubt the facts of your story and your evaluation of the situation based simply on your previously-expressed permissive parenting style. Quote
kevbone Posted July 21, 2008 Author Posted July 21, 2008 What about those parents who do nothing? Kid is whining/misbehaving/acting like an idiot and the parents/oblivions stand there and do nothing. Are you going to start a thread now called "parent abuse"....give it a rest. you started that thread already. I doubt the facts of your story and your evaluation of the situation based simply on your previously-expressed permissive parenting style. The facts of my story are irrelevant. The question still remains…..what do you do in a public place where there is child abuse going on? Quote
KaskadskyjKozak Posted July 21, 2008 Posted July 21, 2008 What about those parents who do nothing? Kid is whining/misbehaving/acting like an idiot and the parents/oblivions stand there and do nothing. Are you going to start a thread now called "parent abuse"....give it a rest. you started that thread already. I doubt the facts of your story and your evaluation of the situation based simply on your previously-expressed permissive parenting style. The facts of my story are irrelevant. The question still remains…..what do you do in a public place where there is child abuse going on? I consider permissive parenting child abuse. Quote
kevbone Posted July 21, 2008 Author Posted July 21, 2008 Anyone else have an opinion on child abuse. KKK is too much a jack ass to have a real conversation with and Rumr beats his kids so....anyone else? Quote
minx Posted July 21, 2008 Posted July 21, 2008 kevin, i want to say this careful. there is no malice towards you in this comment... i personally am reluctant to share what i would do in a case of public child abuse b/c your definition is likely much different than mine. if you did what i would do in the case of open child abuse, in this circumstance i don't think it would be appropriate. Quote
RuMR Posted July 21, 2008 Posted July 21, 2008 kevin...you have no idea what kind of parent i am... now, on that note, why don't you go have a bongo sesh with your offspring, maybe pass the bowl around and bond with junior, and then explain to him how he is not a tool, despite the fact that he'll have no respect for authority, but its not his fault like... stupid people should not breed... Quote
pink Posted July 21, 2008 Posted July 21, 2008 when i got old enough i thanked my dad for the abuse and apologized for being such an asshole. Quote
RuMR Posted July 21, 2008 Posted July 21, 2008 i did a very similar thing...looking back, my dad was flat awesome and showed remarkable restraint, but he sure knew how (and when) to use his belt, and i thank him for it... Quote
kevbone Posted July 21, 2008 Author Posted July 21, 2008 kevin...you have no idea what kind of parent i am... I disagree......you have posted enought times about parenting to give me a solid idea of what kind of parent you are. Quote
pink Posted July 21, 2008 Posted July 21, 2008 i did a very similar thing...looking back, my dad was flat awesome and showed remarkable restraint, but he sure knew how (and when) to use his belt, and i thank him for it... you're still a fag Quote
denalidave Posted July 21, 2008 Posted July 21, 2008 My dad had was president of his college fraternity and all he had to do most of the time is just get the paddle off the top of the fridge and we would stop whatever bad behavior was going on. I can remember that old paddle vividly, all taped together and the names of all it's frat victims penned on the back of it. Sure, I got plenty of spankings with it and I'm sure I deserved all of them. Overall, my parents loved me as best they could and would still do anything for me or my siblings. Sometimes we need a good ol ass whipping to keep us in line. I'm not sure what to say about this case, as I was not there to see it. But, I would agree that based on KB's prior post about raising kids, it may have been seen much differently in someone else's eyes. Quote
RuMR Posted July 21, 2008 Posted July 21, 2008 not likely that you know what kind of parent i am because of some posts on here...I could make the same comment about you and the potential of your offspring, but that would be presumptuous... FWIW, my kids flat out rock...they are upstanding, respectful kids...kick ass in school, try hard in sports, listen to teachers and are generally pleasant people to be around. Maybe, its in spite of me, not because of me...but i like to think that i have a fair bit of influence... most of the times a simple word or brief discussion over the merits or lack of merits of some of their choices is enough to "fix" issues... I do not discipline them lightly, and conversely, its not pleasant when it comes to that...for me or them... Do not pretend to tell others the *right* way of parenting...if i look over at *your* situation and see some *out of control* punk kid running the show, I just might have some *choice* words for you. You come off as a total arrogant asshole with no real regard for what the situation really is... a kumbaya to you, asshole... Quote
RuMR Posted July 21, 2008 Posted July 21, 2008 i did a very similar thing...looking back, my dad was flat awesome and showed remarkable restraint, but he sure knew how (and when) to use his belt, and i thank him for it... you're still a fag so...you excited for 3rd grade? Quote
minx Posted July 21, 2008 Posted July 21, 2008 i was a little shit. i would just get worse if i got a spanking. "oh yea! i'll show you." and then my parents would really have to figure something out. they were strict. and i thank them for that now. i have a 1/2 sister who is 23yrs younger than i am. my dad is not nearly as strict and i'm stunned every time i visit by what PITA she is. Quote
kevbone Posted July 21, 2008 Author Posted July 21, 2008 Do not pretend to tell others the *right* way of parenting...if i look over at *your* situation and see some *out of control* punk kid running the show, I just might have some *choice* words for you. Relax up there broham....I have not....nor will I ever tell you how to raise your children. I am sure they are wonderful. Just like I would hope you would not tell me how to raise my child (soon to be children). My child is not out of control. He has huge amounts of structure all day long. He does have bounderies. You come off as a total arrogant asshole with no real regard for what the situation really is... How have I come off as arrogant? I witnessed IMO total disrespect for a child.....and I am the jerk? Maybe you need a beer and some chil time. I just wanted some feed back on how to handle it in the furture. Ru...have you ever witnessed child abuse by your standards before? If not maybe you should shop at Walmart more often.... Quote
rob Posted July 21, 2008 Posted July 21, 2008 Kevin, merely causing pain does not constitute child abuse. For example, spanking is not child abuse. Every state has slightly different laws. Almost all have some exception listed like below This chapter shall not be construed to authorize interference with child-raising practices, including reasonable parental discipline, that are not injurious to the child's health, welfare, and safety. Nothing in this chapter may be used to prohibit the reasonable use of corporal punishment as a means of discipline. We all know your position on the use of corporal punishment, but that doesn't automatically make it child abuse, "just cause you say so." I wasn't there, so I guess I can't really say. Quote
kevbone Posted July 22, 2008 Author Posted July 22, 2008 I wasn't there, so I guess I can't really say. If it leaves a bruse does not constitue abuse? I would say so. Quote
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