+1 for feathered friends. On my recommendation, a friend of mine just went in to get a backpack for his girlfriend, and had as great an experience as the ones I've had there.
I esp. loved each sentence on a separate line, for dramatic effect. Was that to mimic the pauses between phrases? I could almost image the lights dimming as the camera came in for the closeup.
Fade to black...and SCENE!
I don't remember how much it cost me to hike on non-maintained trails on the Bailey Range, but it was a lot.
I got revenge by pissing in their wilderness!!!1
lolz who's the ranger now?