Bug

I hitch hiked to Alaska one year and almost got busted going into Alaska even though pot was legal there at the time. They took my backpack and opened everything. They searched and patted me till I thought I was going to get a woody. I had had a bong in one of the pockets and the smell was kind of obvious so they were sure they had me. If there would have been one seed anywhere on me I would have been their plaything. As it was, I walked into Alaska a free man and just smiled and waved goodby to those diligent dicks. That is exactly what you are dealing with at the border. It isn't about crime prevention or anything like that. They're dicks doing dickwork.

Is that 'ttttttttt' as in 'shitttttttttt'?

When I was wearing green underwear we built a bigger bridge than either of those using crosscut saws, adz, and axes in 4 months. We had horses to pull the logs. We got the coveted "Primitive Skills Award" for the project and I even got to shake hands with the Chief of the Forest Service. It took weeks to get that smell off. There's somethin brewin here that don't even smell good to me. Funding is based on previous years' use. Maybe the Enchantments are just too dang expensive. Maybe the answer lies in the murky smoke filled back rooms where industry fatcats hump forest service rangers and the policy prevails. Policy comes down from the execuative branch. Thank you George. Like your dad, you will go down in history as "the Environmental President". I heard about a bug that ate a president's shit once. He swelled up bigger than a tic and lingered that way for days. When he finally popped, no one could go within four inches of the drip line for weeks. We gotta mobilize here folks. No shit.

My rippling abs now ripple in the slightest breeze.

When I was young and scary I lived in the valley now and then. One fine morning someone slipped something in my coffee and I was seeing all kinds of changes. Luckily I was already way up in Little Yosemite valley before I was unable to travel safely. I had wandered off the trail for quite a ways and parked behind a log or something big and darkish. After sitting there for a while a person suddenly appeared in front of me. I greated him as best I could and he turned and looked at me for a minute then said "Man I'm sorry. I can't talk right now. I'm too high." And left.

It didn't fit.

The first time I was on the Muldrow glacier I wore tennis shoes with holes in the bottoms and carried a large screw driver just in case.

Where does all that shit go?

-148. The first winter ascent of Denali. More of a slog than a climb but that 6 day bivy makes "heinous" sound like a picnic. Or Winter of Our Discontent. Three assholes pull off the first winter ascent of the Cassin Ridge. These guys were true assholes. Even Dru seems nice by comparison. Well, sort of nice.

Belay device, parabiner, and cleaning tool on rear harness loop. Cams and wires on a gear sling, draws and a few slung pieces on the other gear sling, Long runners over one shouder. In alpine wall climbing there is often need to move the gear out of the way. For swapping leads it helps speed things up. For most trad routes it probably isn't that important but it is the way I always do it out of habit.

When belaying a leader you should be clipped in to an anchor that will keep you right where you want to be. Under an overhang on a soft pillow of moss with a wood fairy carressing your forehead is optimal but you may have to settle for just being held down. Or I will eat you.

Is that what I think it is? Moooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooommmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy?????

Other. Big piles. 27 seconds. The ones without port-a-johns. Lots. We come out in hatches. How much edible waste is available. I go where ever I want. How do I tell? 29 seconds and still ticking.

2. free of rope or harness (fall takes you to the ground-not hanging on a rope) Yum. Sounds like a feast to me. Where can I find a place like that.

quote: Originally posted by max: The word "precipices" sounds and looks like "testpieces". And presupposes you have testicles.

After a month in the Wind River range, my partner and I went to Devil's Tower for some sun and . While climbing the first day, I was unable to get anything to stick in the rock. It was unnerving, like having your girlfriend belay you. We basically free soloed the route and topped out. Down in the cottonwoods was a Souix Sun Dance going on. We had been climbing on their alter. Does anyone know how to simulate the twilight zone music on a chat site?

In general climbers are too emotionally retarded to have girlfriends and wives. If they do have one, temporarly, there certainly isn't going to be any communication and that rules out teaching her how to belay unless you don't mind training her for the next climber which brings me to my point. If you must climb with your sexual partner, find one that has been through a climber or two and at least one belay training session at the gym. Pack extra shit so she doesn't have to go without. And don't sneek up on her when she is going potty. They hate that. If you think you are going to teach your non-climbing girlfriend how to belay, I have a brand new pair of EB's to sell you.

Shit. I can't do anything right. Good thing I'm only a dumbshit bug.

I am sorry to hear about your friends dying in a car crash. Seriously. I have known two people who fell to their deaths on 5.5 and 5.7. One was a 5.11 leader freesoloing 5.7, the other was a newbie on lead. She was "very athletic" and kept up with everyone at everything. But she made one mistake 40 ft off the ground on her second lead, pulled two pieces, and landed on her head. Her climbing friends who were there cheering her on weren't very happy with their decision. Just a little anecdotal information there. I don't mean to hurt anyone's feelings.

quote: Originally posted by Dru: But if you are successful you can sell a book with pictures of all the people who took our advice and died learning to lead. You see the corpse piles every time you go near Barney's Rubble or Mountie Dome. I bet the yuppies who bought Into Thin Err would buy your book too! Big dog Drhu has spoken? So would you suggest free soloing? Perhaps when you have had good friends die doing things that "everyone does" you will mellow out a little bit.

I climb piles of shit.

Be careful Nadia. There are some on this site who advocate "just getting out there and leading" to gain experience. That is not cool. It will get you killed.

When it gets old and worn out I eat it. Then it really turns to shit.