in 10,000 BC i made the first ascent of a brontosaurus, placing hand-chipped flint pitons along the way. this was before fire was invented so we could only do night descents using glow-worms, fireflies and bioluminescent alagae.
Not OK to rub on hands:
Nitric acid
Caustic soda
Butyric acid
Tar sludge
Rabid wolverines
OK to rub on hands:
Dove soap
Chalk
Rubbing alcohol
Firm, natural breasts