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why are new englanders douchebags?


keenwesh

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realized this was more of a counseling center question, so moving it over here.

 

Lately here in MT I've noticed that kids from the NE and I do not really get along. I don't know what it is but apparently my public school background makes me inferior and my suggestions seem to insight passive aggressive storms of silence.

 

Tomorrow I'm going up to try good looking one, a M6 WI5, one of the best pitches in the canyon. I asked a kid who just bought a brand new set of 2nd gen fusions if he'd like to TR it after me and he immediately acted offended that I would even offer. He replied with a pretentious hurumpf "I don't want to waste my picks or scratch up my tools". The same guy outright refused a toperope on thrill is gone, how can you hate something without even trying it? every interaction we have involves him having to prove me wrong in some way, or "gain the upper hand", no matter how trivial the topic.

 

Some other NEasters became noticeably concerned and aloof when I mentioned that I wasn't planning on joining this greek honor society for college freshman. costs $100 to get in and all it means is you got above a 3.5 GPA the first semester of school. over one million members nationally, if you want to pay money to get your name on a meaningless list good for you but I'll pass. I didn't say any of that though, just said I wasn't doing it. Utter silence and pure judgement.

 

how do I respond to shit like that? am I an asshole? what can I do?

 

btw everyone I know from the south are all easygoing mellow people, seems to be exclusively a new england thing.

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To begin with, from what I can tell from your post; No, you are not an asshole. But you're running into a few, or at least that's how they BEHAVE. Very important distinction there.

 

In my life I've known a number of people from New England, and have noted that many who were sent to prep schools and places such as Andover or Seton Hall, and then later went on to very privileged educations at Ivy League shcools(misspelling intentional here on my part :grin: )suffer from an illusion of social and intellectual superiority. It's because of being raised in a pretty rarified and privileged atmosphere. Their parents and families, often going back generations, are extremely status conscious, and it can have major implications for one's continued position and fortunes whether social, political, corporate, etc., in the real world, or at least the real world as it applies to their position. Acceptance into various country clubs,golfing or polo circles,certain colleges and universities, fraternities and sororities, or business organizations can be incredibly cutthroat, snippy, catty, well, many other adjectives apply.It really is a very different world back there.

 

Among the Trustafarians and other scions and debutantes of wealthy families I've run into in places like Jackson, Wyo., Sun Valley, Tahoe, etc, you find many times people who've never had to do a thing for themselves, who've had no need or experience in earning their own daily bread or making their own way, and while they can appear to be very secure on the outside, often suffer from profound feelings of inadequacy, aimlessness, and disconnection from others of more modest backgrounds. So their social skills, while not exactly lacking, are better matched to the pressure cooker situation from which they come. And those skills can show a marked lack of "real" manners, of simple respect for people based in real substance of human character, rather than on financial status. This can become a very serious handicap in later life. Witness the current crop of privileged political candidates and some of the

myopic attitudes they display about the poor and working class.

 

But I've run into some very, very fine people, too, those who were raised never to think of themselves as more important or more valuable than anyone else. The very best families (and again, by that I DO NOT mean in terms of financial assets alone) have taken care to inculcate compassion but not paternalism, sociability and friendliness of true warmth rather than expedience or social maneuvering, and that "real" manners are paramount, based in genuine consideration for the worth and feelings of others, no matter what their walk of life, graciousness and calm under pressure, being assertive rather than aggressive, and never to think for a moment that life is in any way assured or certain.

 

A quote I got from one of these friends ( and we are still friends after 35 years) goes; "It's easy to be pleasant and cheerful, when life flows by like a song; But the man worthwhile, is the one who can smile, when everything goes dead wrong."(Ella Wheeler Wilcox)

 

There are all kinds in this world, as I'm sure you know, and some of them can definitely ACT like real douchbags, but sometimes when you scratch the surface, you find a real person in there, who's just like the rest of us, with all the fears and insecurities and blind spots everyone has. I once caretook a huge house in Jackson Hole for an elderly woman who was from an Eastern family of well, pretty much unlimited money. She was one of the unhappiest people I ever met in my life, extremely lonely, and she could be very, very hard with people. And she used to come and regularly sit and bemoan her situation to me because she was continually and inescapably plagued with lawsuits and days spent, or wasted as she felt, in law offices and courtrooms, because her entire family was at each other's throats over money, and it was just as mean, vindictive,bitter, underhanded and brutal as any gutter fight you could imagine. She told me so many times that her money was a terrible curse, yet she couldn't let go of any of it. And her children were the same. Lots of problems with alchohol and drugs in the family, suicides, etc.

 

So, not to lecture, but maybe next time you have a chance,with some of these douchebags, stop and think, look below the surface a little. I've always liked what Will Rogers used to say: "I've never met a man I didn't like." Now that was a true aristocrat, a man among men. And how to respond? What can you do?

 

Simple. There's an old Zen proverb which says, "You should conduct yourself always, as if in the presence of an honored guest, even when alone in a darkened room" So, you act like the true gentleman you are, in spite of your "friend's" unsociable behavior. He very much sounds like someone who's got some things bothering him, all right. Doesn't sound like a very happy person to me at all. Now, you don't have to let anyone walk on you, to be sure; but you can be magnanimous, kind, and unruffled, generous. You can let it pass, let it roll off like water off a duck's back. Smile and offer a hand, and say, "Hey, sorry if I somehow offended you, let's be friends." Then the ball's in his court, isn't it. And if he's still nasty, you can shrug your shoulders and say, "Hey, OK, take care.." and just walk away,let him be.If he's not too messed up, he'll figure it out eventually. That's one of the great things that climbing's all about, after all, the fellowship of the rope. You need friends if you're gonna climb, at least to begin with. You need climbing partners to learn, and the mountains play no favorites, the rock and ice are always the rock and ice, and they continually face you with ...what? YOURSELF. Even on toprope.

 

This is what the old-time mountain men and trappers used to call, "The University of the Mountains", and Montana is such a great place to get that kind of education. That country is known as a great leveler of men, whittling big egos down to size with utter disregard for fancy college degrees, high-falutin' titles or blueblood pretentions. The Chinese have a great folk proverb: "On the hand, fingers are easily broken, but a fist, not so easily." Or like the saying that "A single stick is easily snapped, but not so a bundle." A single person , until fully trained,strengthened and matured, can go down quickly. People are strongest when they come together. To do that takes cooperation and understanding, and in climbing, money might buy you a new set of tools, but you still have to do the climbing and be part of a team to accomplish great things. My guess is your New England acquaintance will either discover this, if he's smart, or move on to something where his money or attitude will find more application.

 

In the meantime, what a great opportunity for you to meet with a truly difficult person and to sharpen your skills in dealing with him. Just like climbing, here's a crux or tight spot, if you will. When you get past it, your ability and confidence grows. You'll meet people like this guy all your life, there's one around every corner. But you're on a lifelong climb, and this fellow just hasn't realized that yet, or what it really means. Even enemies are a true gift, because of what we have to call on from within ourselves to face them with courage and honor. Just remember that we're all just folks, like Will Rogers said. I always get a kick out of the way he'd call the greatest cities in the world "big camps". From New York or Paris or Rome, he'D write to his friends and say, "Well, folks, here we are in the Big Camp on the Hudson," or "the Big camp on the Seine", etc. And he was so right; we're really all just camping here for a while, can't stay for long, might as well try to get along and just be folks, help each other out when we can, enjoy life day by day. Easy does it. Climb On.... :wave:

 

PS/ Read Rudyard Kipling's great little poem "If", especially where he says, "if you can walk with Kings, nor lose the common touch". Some good material there.

Edited by Mtguide
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thanks for your comprehensive and well composed reply mtguide, if only I could come up with stuff like that for the papers I have to write here in school. Yeah I kinda figured as much, I try and be as polite and friendly as possible, climbing with him today was alright. managed to float my way up a really fun bolted mixed route that he outright refused to get on again. Messed around on TR on this burly M7-8 which was tons of fun. the guy just won't even try it. And when I asked if I could run a lap on the ice line he was climbing he pulled the rope down.

 

I'm trying my best but it's hard to not just sock him in the face haha. like I can't imagine doing that to anyone. Did some mixed with my buddy from north carolina, he was hesitant to start but once he reached to top the grin on his face was priceless. It's stuff like that that keeps me climbing.

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Thanks Keenwesh; you know, I wonder if this fellow is so new to climbing that he needs to get on some easier stuff to get going, gain some skills and technique before jumping onto stiff routes. You don't say much about his level of experience, physical conditioning, etc. Maybe he's insecure because of some shortcomings there and just doesn't want to embarass himself by failing in front of others. (As if we don't all have to do plenty of that while learning to climb.)

 

And if he is pretty new to climbing, for some it takes awhile to learn to trust the gear, so that getting up off the deck, even on toprope, is still pretty scary. Although if he was doing that ice line you mention, well, it seems he'd have to have some fairly good level of experience. Did he set up the TR on that route?

 

Any way, you're taking the right approach, just one step at a time. Try like hell to refrain from busting him one; my martial arts teacher used to tell us NEVER engage in a fight unless absolutely cornered. "Run ten blocks if you have to" he'd say,"but don't fight unless there's no other alternative."

 

It really is too bad he won't even try something; he might not know what he's missing. But, don't push him on it; some guys just have to do their thing. And as Alex Lowe said, "The best climber is the one having the most fun." To each his own, no matter how weird it seems.

 

Oh, one last thing, BTW. I was looking back at your original post where you mentioned the Greek honor society, which I assume is merit-based on your GPA. And here, I have to say, the $100.00 would be very well spent. While you're going through your university career, it won't hurt you one bit to amass as many awards and honors as possible. And this isn't just because it'll look great on your resume. Academic fraternities are very different from social ones; they are a true reflection of your abilities and accomplishments, and they're also a much more genuine fellowship of shared trials and triumphs on the way to mastery of your profession. As such, things like this can be a real foot in the door in later years as you climb to the summit of your chosen field. It can open doors for you, not just in terms of employment and financial compensation, but also in terms of mutual respect and genuine lifelong friendships with your colleagues, things which no amount of money can buy.

 

So you might want to take a second look at this one. I have had many lifelong friends as a result of my membership in several academic fraternities, and as you journey through life you never know when you're going to run into a fellow honoree, and what might result from that meeting. Invitation to participate in wonderful research or creative opportunities, with the potential for exciting discoveries or once-in-a-lifetime breakthroughs and achievements in science, the arts or humanities, these are the things we're here for, to help each other as we all rise together, for the betterment of all. The academic societies are very old, and yet forever young, continually challenging and supporting the expansion of learning and applied practice; they're well worth the nickel.

Edited by Mtguide
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I'm very skeptical of anything greek. I researched this thing "alpha lambda delta" literally all it means is you got a 3.5 your first semester. I figure anyplace that won't hire me based on me not being a member of that society is a place I do not want to work in.

 

Most frats I've visited out here have been bizarre, girls dancing on table tops and shit like that, cool if you're in a strip club but really weird when you end up sitting next to them in bio 256. "hey, you're that slut who stripped in front of like 35 frat guys and then got gangbanged behind the bar, nice". When stuff like that is going down and the guys in the house don't really have much of a problem with it I start to shy away and try and distance myself as far as I can. I'm not a feminist by any means but I do have some respect for those of the opposite gender. As in I don't just view them as things to put my dick in, which seems to be the general view of the frat guys around here.

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Totally agree with you on the social or society frats. If you think a smaller school like Mt. State is bad, you should see places like the frat scene at the larger schools. Just crazy. Animal House is alive and well.

 

Also totally agree on your view of respect for women, sounds like you come from good people.

 

But the fraternities I'm talking about are ones like Phi Beta Kappa, Phi Theta Kappa,Sigma Alpha Iota, etc. which maintain offices and records, but are not residential houses. These are professional organizations for people of consistent high academic performance and brilliance in their chosen field. Phi Beta Kappa is perhaps the most famous and universally recognized among 4 year colleges, Phi Theta Kappa for junior and community colleges, for the sciences and liberal arts and humanities.

I just googled Alpha Lamda Delta and was very favorably impressed by the Wikipedia description. I think it's definitely an academic, and NOT a social fraternity, and again I'd strongly encourage you to take a second look at it. They offer scholarships, professional referral, research opportunities, etc. You may be confusing the beer-drenched sex party-type frats with these very sober and enlightened fraternities who would never have anything to do with that kind of behavior. Alpha Lamda Delta was actually begun as a women's academic society, no less, but has in later years become coeducational.I highly doubt that you'd ever see so much as a hint of a gang-bang at one of their functions. I respect your skepticism regarding the social fraternities, but don't lump the good in with the bad just because of an aversion to "anything greek". If you do that, aren't you being kind of like your New England friend who refuses to get on certain routes?

 

Reasonable skepticism is healthy, but don't let it close your eyes, or worse, your mind, to the truly wonderful opportunities that are available to you in the academic world, places where you can meet people of brilliance and creativity who are serious about their time in university and full of positive and realistic idealism for making the world a better place. College is all about opening your mind, casting off ill-informed doubts and fears as you enlarge your understanding of life and the world, step by step, class by class, person by person. Above all, don't be afraid of things that are new or strange to you. Sure, check things out in a clear-headed manner, but, just like in climbing, don't be afraid to step through doors or launch out onto a pitch that you're not quite sure you can climb. Sounds to me like you've got a good moral compass and solid belay of character, so go take a look. Always, always be ready and willing to GO SEE. I love Kipling's poem "Ranges"; "..something lost, behind the ranges, something waiting,go and see! Something lost, beyond the ranges,across the ranges, go you there!"

 

That's the spirit of adventure, the sense of wonder and imagination, from which greatness is born. So, I more than just strongly encourage, I challenge you, my friend, to go walk through the doors of Alpha Lamda Delta, and at least really go find out. You never know what might be waiting behind those doors; international travel,the career of your dreams, the love of your life. In life, as in climbing,there are no guarantees, but I can guarantee you one thing: IF YOU DON'T GO, YOU'LL NEVER KNOW.

 

Go ahead and Google Alpha Lamda, Phi Betta Kappa, etc. I think you'll find it very interesting.

 

And, don't be too strait-laced about things. I believe it was Winston Churchill who said that he would "never trust a man who won't take a drink." You don't have to get wild and drunken out-of-control, but don't forget to enjoy life and fun while you're young. Partying and socializing are a very important part of college life, after all, the academic grind is damned hard, and we all need to let off steam once in awhile. It doesn't have to be a gang-bang orgy, you know your own limits. But it's true, some people just go off their nut in college, and if you're gonna get wild, that's the time and place to do it. I wouldn't be too judgmental about that hotty slut in Bio 256, she might actually have a heart of gold and a mind like Leonardo Da Vinci for all you know. Hell, in ten years she'll probably be packing her 2.5 kids into the minivan to soccer practice or ballet, married to some corporate dickhead, still wondering about that cute guy she sat next to in bio 256 that never would give her a tumble. Life goes fast, man; relax a little, and "gather ye rosebuds while yet ye may", as the old saying goes. You'll be pushing around a walker soon enough. Never be afraid to let a little cutie turn your world upside down once in while, be good for you. Who knows, maybe someday those'll be YOUR 2.5 kids; just make sure you're a damned fine husband and dad, and not that corporate dickhead. Cheers. :grin::rocken:

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I believe it was Winston Churchill who said that he would "never trust a man who won't take a drink."

 

Churchill would have no problems trusting Keenwesh, who has a pretty good handle on adventure and enjoying life, is not unacquainted with the term "party", and is indeed a good egg from good people.

 

My favorable Greek experiences include membership in a Fraority called Hubba Hubba Phi and some sorority girls from Phi Bitea Dicka who had a certain rough charm.

 

K, your innate exuberance is probably a little bit much for more repressed NE types, but they're not all that way.

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it's hard not to be an asshole, no matter where ye're from - not certain how many friends i had when i was an out-lander who weren't :)

 

that said, the 2 new-englanders i spent time w/ were in alaska at the time and we laughed n' smoked like relentless happy morons for a week w/o incident :rawk:

 

 

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I believe it was Winston Churchill who said that he would "never trust a man who won't take a drink."

 

Churchill would have no problems trusting Keenwesh, who has a pretty good handle on adventure and enjoying life, is not unacquainted with the term "party", and is indeed a good egg from good people.

 

Good to hear... it sounded like he was, just from the fact that he was willing to question himself first before finding fault with someone else..pretty rare; a good egg indeed. :tup:

 

 

Edited by Mtguide
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off thank you for weighing in with your thoughts on Phi Bitea Dicka, maybe as I grow older I'll be able to appreciate the "rough charm" that they are known for. As for the current situation with the new englanders, one refuses to make eye contact with me, despite my best efforts for friendship and just general good cheer, the others display a kind of reserved horror for my exuberance towards climbing rock climbs with metal hooks. I traded my vipers for a set of nomics and now have no excuse to fail on my mixed aspirations other than my own ineptitude. Managed to crack myself a good one across the brow this afternoon, didn't come off even though I was knocked senseless. I guess I must be learning.

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Wow,I guess things have changed since I was in school, they never used to charge fees like that. Seems to be a growing campus industry. They probably picked it up from the banks, credit card and insurance companies. Well, what am I saying? OF COURSE, they're offering you the Geico discount. Smells like "racket" to me. Never a good idea to pay money to get money. But that's how insurance is sold, plus you get to bet against yourself, also not the best idea. ::skull::

 

Too bad about the haughty New Englanders, they sound like they're a bit of a tradition/hidebound bunch. Next time you see 'em, just ask if they brought their nailed boots/ rope-soled

shoes/alpenstocks/bota bags/lederhosen,etc. today. Sad to hear of the young acting like such snooty,stodgy, stiff-necked old farts, there'll be plenty of time for all that later... :rolleyes:

 

An' jes' keep a 'swangin them thar tyools, a good alpinist is always happiest with one foot on the rock and the other on the ice. :grin:

Edited by Mtguide
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  • 4 weeks later...

some other east coast kid just told me that "mixed climbing is easy" and that since I had thought a climb was hard I "must just really suck at mixed climbing". I'm not taking any liberties here this is word for word what he said. I asked him if he had ever tried mixed climbing and he replied "no". The entire time I was waiting for him to start laughing and tell me that he was fucking with me, but no, he was dead serious.

 

what gives these east coasters the sense of entitlement that they can pass judgement on something they know absolutely nothing about? I'm trying to understand but I just do not get it. If I was that much of a ignorant douche to someone I would fully expect to get a fist to the face.

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and Off, if you read this I'm taking eamon out mixed climbing tomorrow, he's currently visiting and I figure I should get him good and scared on some hyalite choss. Be sure to ask him about it next time he's doing menial labor around you're house.

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some other east coast kid just told me that "mixed climbing is easy" and that since I had thought a climb was hard I "must just really suck at mixed climbing". I'm not taking any liberties here this is word for word what he said. I asked him if he had ever tried mixed climbing and he replied "no". The entire time I was waiting for him to start laughing and tell me that he was fucking with me, but no, he was dead serious.

 

what gives these east coasters the sense of entitlement that they can pass judgement on something they know absolutely nothing about? I'm trying to understand but I just do not get it. If I was that much of a ignorant douche to someone I would fully expect to get a fist to the face.

 

I think some of these kinds of people, having been raised in"blueblood' families, with every advantage, feel this kind of arrogant entitlement because they actually have BEEN more or less entitled to any- and everything they ever wanted or needed, their entire lives. And I think that includes being really spoiled behaviorally, not just materially or financially. In other words they've ALWAYS gotten their own way their whole life. I think it's especially true of many who grew up as the only child of weathy parents; I also think the family's political persuasion might have something to do with it as well.

 

The famous conservative author and political pundit William F. Buckley, Jr., son of a wealthy family,(and a large family--10 children) was raised with almost every possible advantage. Buckley had a nauseating and overwhelming sense of himself as absolutely superior in every way to other people. Watching him being interviewed or debate the issues on talk shows was almost morbidly fascinating because his supercilious arrogance was so incredibly visible and apparent in his every word and action. He literally oozed an overbearing, haughty, patrician, lordly, seething contempt for almost everyone else around him, as if he could barely stand to tolerate their lowly existence in his presence. The manner in which he spoke and answered questions communicated an unmistakeable, palpable attitude of utter dismissal of what he seemed to perceive as the unbearable stupidity and ignorance of others.

 

Buckley was very, very smart, all right, it was extremely difficult to lay a finger on him in political debate.( He had been captain of the debate team in his years at Yale). But his conviction that he was the smartest man in the world, was just not true. I think you could certainly say, as the Northern Plains Indians did of the white man, that Buckley was smart, but not wise. He evinced very little compassion for others,especially for the poor and disadvantaged, and among the wisest people, of any time or place, compassion is a true sign of real wisdom and real intelligence. To his credit, in his later life, his views moderated. Although he remained staunchly conservative-libertarian, he reversed himself on such issues as segregation and civil rights legislation, became a friend of Martin Luther King, and in general began to take a much more balanced view of things as he aged. But the old patrician superiority never quite left him, even though he poked fun at himself for it on occasion. Overall a thoroughly entertaining and fascinating, if irascible, person.

 

But in his younger and middle years, Buckley was a pretty accurate example of the kinds of NE persona you're talking about. And he was, and remains, an actual icon and idol to a lot of people from that part of the country and similar background. These are people who don't just THINK they're better than you or I; they fucking KNOW they are. It can be pretty hard to take, all right. They can be very clique-ish; most of their friends are people like themselves. The rest of us, to them, are just so much riff-raff. And it doesn't bother them one whit to say so or to treat you that way. :rolleyes: Like my Dad used to say, "Th' woods're full of 'em." :D

 

But that's OK; let 'em have their little conceits, their yachts and expensive degrees, their country clubs, etc. Because this arrogance is a very revealing sign of what is actually a huge sense of insecurity and inadequacy. It's a paradox, but in truth, many people who've been given everything, have a terrible sense of inferiority because they've never had to do a thing to make their own way in the world. They have no idea of what it means to create their own lives or to have to struggle, work hard, and overcome obstacles to achieve their dreams. In fact many of them don't even HAVE dreams of their own, because there's nothing to struggle or work FOR; it's already been done for them. So, many of them have really no idea of who or what they are, or what they'd do if they had to fend for themselves. I think I mentioned this a little in one of my previous posts on this subject; how many "trustafarians" are pretty aimless and lost, never really knowing what to do with themselves. Not exactly an enviable life. So even the privileged are deserving of some compassion, along these lines. What appears to be so cushy and desirable from the outside, might be a pretty empty, bleak, and sad existence on the inside. I don't think I'd want to trade places with them.

 

And at the same time, I have to say that some of these kinds of people I've met and gotten to know, are just fine, fine people in every way. It just all depends on how they were raised, the values and principles they were given, which in the long run are far more precious than any kind of material wealth or social standing and privilege. As one friend I met many years ago in Jackson Hole said when we were introduced, he joked about his background (he was a DuPont/ Rothschild--essentially, unlimited money)held out his hand saying,with a big grin, "Well yeah, I'm a rich kid--but please don't hold that against me". He was one of those guys you just like instantly, just quite simply one of the nicest, most genuine people I've ever known. He's used his wealth to do a great deal of good in the world, and prefers to keep well out of sight, behind the scenes. One of those donors to wonderful projects, humanitarian and environmental causes who's always listed as "Anonymous". It just all depends on the person. Try to never let the dollar signs, or the behavior, blind you to what the true value and character of a person might be on the inside.

 

This guy you mention who passed judgment on your mixed climbing ability, even though he's never done any himself, sounds to me like he's pretty insecure, and probably wishes he had the guts to try to do what you have. So, if he's feeling inadequate that way, the easiest thing to do is not only to put you down, but to put down mixed climbing itself, as well. Very, very defensive behavior. As if to say well, mixed climbing is so easy, (meaning "inferior", and therefore beneath him) why even bother trying it? Really, how "quaint", how "pedestrian", how "provincial", how "proletarian". See what I'm driving at? I really feel kind of sorry for the guy, just from what you're describing. He's probably scared to death to do it, not so much of the climbing itself, but of being embarrassed by showing any lack of ability on his own part, more afraid of losing face than anything else. Like I say, I wouldn't care to trade places with him, and neither would you. Just let him be; maybe eventually he'll figure it out and someday he might turn out to be a pretty good guy. Probably gonna take awhile. It the meantime, just do your own climbing, take enjoyment and satisfaction from that, don't brag or even talk about what you've done, and just let the opinions of others roll off like water off a duck's back. Just keep working at it and keep your own counsel. It'll all level out further downstream.

 

 

Edited by Mtguide
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I feel like I'm compelled to step in and say that douchebags can be from anywhere. I grew up on the east coast (as per my username) and while I didn't have a privileged background I did have a fair number of friends who do. And they're not dicks (I wouldn't be friends with them if they were). I'm sorry you have to deal with such losers out there, but we're not all dickheads. Maybe ask that kid why he didn't get legacy at his grandpappy's university? that might piss him off more.

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As much as I hate to agree with Dubya, you often have to go with your gut with folks. 10K years of hunting and gathering has made us pretty good judges of character in a few seconds/minutes. Contrary to PC dogma, we all don't get along, and it is often best to move on and not over think things too much. There are plenty more cool folks out there to spend time with.

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