Child abuse

[minx]

kevbone...i'd like to wonder what you would do in this case??

 

Rudy, I dont what I would do...but I can tell you what I would not do. Teach my child that if you hurt him I hurt you.

 

 

kevin-- i have to ask why not? this is a common life occurence situation. you hurt someone, you might get hurt too.

[KaskadskyjKozak]

 

kevin-- i have to ask why not? this is a common life occurence situation. you hurt someone, you might get hurt too.

 

he has no idea - 'cos he's a clueless stoner

[minx]

sheeit! now i'm spelling like kevin

[rob]

providing access to an XBox was the best thing I ever did for my son's discipline, because now I can take it away, which, for him, is the equivilent of fire and brimstone.

[minx]

here's another example kevin, i'm sure you'll be shocked. when i was in pre-school i was a biter. when i got mad, i'd bite the other kids. went on for a while and no matter what the teacher did, i continued on. my mom tried all sorts of things to change this behavior and nothing seemed to be working. so one afternoon at home i bit one of my little friends so my mom bit me on the arm. and not very hard. but it shocked the heck out of me and i quit biting the other kids.

[KaskadskyjKozak]

providing access to an XBox was the best thing I ever did for my son's discipline, because now I can take it away, which, for him, is the equivilent of fire and brimstone.

 

when my kids are misbehaving, I tell them it's obvious they have too much energy and need to do a hike up Granite Mountain or Mailbox Peak with me. They usually settle down after that.

 

 

[KaskadskyjKozak]

i was a biter.

 

yikes!!

[minx]

i used to send my son out to run around the house 10 times when he got too worked up. usually settled down after lap 5

[minx]

i was a biter.

 

yikes!!

 

is it the verb tense or the actually biting that scares you?

[KaskadskyjKozak]

i used to send my son out to run around the house 10 times when he got too worked up. usually settled down after lap 5

 

it's funny. my kids have better stamina now, so exercise sometimes just gets them wired on endorphins and I end up being more tired. :-)

[kevbone]

My father grounded my older brother for the entire summer once. He was 16 years old. His punishment was to do 150 push ups a day. Because of that he is ripped to this day......

[pink]

My father grounded my older brother for the entire summer once. He was 16 years old. His punishment was to do 150 push ups a day. Because of that he is ripped to this day......

 

you should get him a sewing kit

[KaskadskyjKozak]

 

my oldest used to talk back a lot and say "bad" words. very strong-willed. instead of spanking or yelling at him I'd give him one warning. 2nd offense and he got one drop of Tabasco sauce on his tongue. my mother used to say it was "child abuse". I don't see how.

 

after a year or two of this, I never had to use this punishment anymore.

 

 

[rob]

2nd offense and he got one drop of Tabasco sauce on his tongue.

 

You woulda had nothin' on me when I was a kid, old man. I love tabasco sauce, AND hiking. I'da walked all over you.

[rob]

My parents never beat me, and I firmly believe to this day that's why I'm such a fuckup.

[KaskadskyjKozak]

2nd offense and he got one drop of Tabasco sauce on his tongue.

 

You woulda had nothin' on me when I was a kid, old man. I love tabasco sauce, AND hiking. I'da walked all over you.

 

yes, this punishment did not work with my youngest. he likes tabasco.

[KaskadskyjKozak]

 

i would've found something for you Rob: horseradish, raw garlic paste, ... something you hate

[RuMR]

here's another example kevin, i'm sure you'll be shocked. when i was in pre-school i was a biter. when i got mad, i'd bite the other kids. went on for a while and no matter what the teacher did, i continued on. my mom tried all sorts of things to change this behavior and nothing seemed to be working. so one afternoon at home i bit one of my little friends so my mom bit me on the arm. and not very hard. but it shocked the heck out of me and i quit biting the other kids.

 

that's an excellent example for kev...he's still a pillow biter according to Pink...

[sobo]

I swear to Dog that my dad gave me a whipping with his doubled-back belt across my bare ass at least once a week (no buckles). Swear it. Truth be told it was prolly more like once a month. The real truth is I deserved every goddamned one of those whippings, and if I had not gotten them, I would either be dead or in prison today.

 

My dad was a fucking idiot when I was a kid, but by the time I was 19 and out of the house, he was pretty smart. By the time I had graduated college, the man was a fucking genius. He continues to get smarter every damn year.

 

Count me standing on the side of the line where Rudy's standing. Ain't nothing wrong with a little well-placed corporal punishment, when warranted. And Rudy, my dad preferred to whip the ass because it wouldn't embarrass us later if we decided to wear shorts. The ass is made for receiving beatings.

[RuMR]

that is one of my points of exposing the leg...he gets to "explain" it...its really irrelevent anyway as i hardly smack them...just the thought that i might is enough...

 

My dad sounds a lot like your dad...we walked all over my mom until she would casually drop the "Well, i guess you and your dad will have to discuss this tonight when he gets home" comment...we straightened up real quick...

 

that said, i ALWAYS enjoyed hanging with pop, whether it was fishing, campin' or whatever...

[hafilax]

Those of you who were spanked (or whatever) that now respect that decision, did you harbor resentment toward or fear the parent? Did you dread your home life? Did it interfere with engaging your parents for advice? What did you do that makes you now think that you deserved the bruise?

 

That is what I would be afraid of by being a strict parent. Would it cause greater problems with them as a teenager where they are afraid to ask for advice? Obedience would be less important to me than self confidence and trust.

[sobo]

that is one of my points of exposing the leg...he gets to "explain" it...its really irrelevent anyway as i hardly smack them...just the thought that i might is enough...

 

My dad sounds a lot like your dad...we walked all over my mom until she would casually drop the "Well, i guess you and your dad will have to discuss this tonight when he gets home" comment...we straightened up real quick...

 

that said, i ALWAYS enjoyed hanging with pop, whether it was fishing, campin' or whatever...

My dad spared us the embarrassment of having to explain the welts to our friends. The beating was quite enough, and it was a private affair.

 

And we ran roughshod over Mom, too. Her phrase was, "You just wait till your father gets home." By the time she got to that point, it was far too late to avoid the whipping.

 

And I always enjoyed hangin' out with Dad, but he worked a helluva lot of long hours so we didn't have to live like porter and billcoe apparently did. Man, I don't envy you guys, and I thought we had it rough as kids. I never had my own pristine shoes or clothes until I was almost 10 years old. Hand-me-down was my middle name.

[mkporwit]

The real truth is I deserved every goddamned one of those whippings, and if I had not gotten them, I would either be dead or in prison today.

 

Absolutely agree. I got a whipping on maybe fifteen or twenty occasions in my life, and I know (and knew then) why I got each one of those beatings. They were definitely well deserved and got important points across.

[sobo]

Those of you who were spanked (or whatever) that now respect that decision, did you harbor resentment toward or fear the parent? Did you dread your home life? Did it interfere with engaging your parents for advice? What did you do that makes you now think that you deserved the bruise?

 

That is what I would be afraid of by being a strict parent. Would it cause greater problems with them as a teenager where they are afraid to ask for advice? Obedience would be less important to me than self confidence and trust.

I had a healthy fear of my dad, but not because of the whippings, but because I knew he would whip me if I deserved it. If I did whatever was expected of me for age-appropriate behaviour, there were no worries. I did not dread my home life unless I lipped off and swore at a teacher, hurt an animal, or any other dumb shit that pre-adolescent males do. If I did these things, then you betcha I feared going home that night, because I'm a real shitty liar and my dad could smell a liar a mile and half away. He would whip me just for lying sometimes, and not for whatever it was that I lied about. He hates liars.

 

By the time I was seeking parental advice, my dad was ensconced in projects in the Middle East, and I finished high school in the States without his immediate presence and guidance. For that, I am sad, because I might be further along in my career by now had I had him available to consult. Or not. The things I did and learned and the mistakes I made in those "wasted" 4-5 years between two college tries have contributed to make me more of what I am today than anything else I can imagine, except my parents' unconditional love. I may have been a real shit kid to have as a son, but my parents never gave up on their love for me. Their love was what instilled confidence and trust in myself, because I was never very obedient. Still ain't...

[PLC]

With my parents, the yelling/beatings/etc. never really had anything to do with our behavior - it was entirely dependent upon my parents mood. Basically, they were two crazy people living in our house who might blow up for no good reason.

 

Our reaction as kids was to treat them like crazy people - we never took them seriously and we paid no attention to thier discipline.

 

I can remember distinctly my mom saying something like "you better get this kitchen clean before your dad comes home, or you're in for it" and I replied "whether or not the kitchen is clean has nothing to do with it - either he's gonna be in a bad mood or he's not, there's nothing I can do about it".