Vulgariphone

[CleeshterFeeshter]

In Chris Jones "HX of North American Climbing", he discussed that the Vulgarians had a Vulgariphone (some sort of tube device) that let out a 150 decible fart that could be heard from the Lower saddle at the Grand all the way down to Jackson Ho. Has anyone built one or know how it works?

[Dru]

Just pack trask with a few cans of beans.

[allthumbs]

Nice post Dru aka Mr. Fartypants.

Fart-fighting underwear invented

An inventor from Colorado has created the world's first fart-proof underwear.

Buck Weimer says his airtight knickers have a replaceable charcoal filter to remove bad gas before it escapes. The undies, called Under-Ease, are on sale over the internet.

Buck, from Pueblo, said he thought up his invention after his wife 'let go a bomb' in bed one night. Buck, 62, and Arlene, 57, suffer from Crohn's disease, an inflammatory bowel syndrome.

In both men and women's styles, the underwear, made from a soft, airtight, nylon-type fabric, is designed for people with chronic flatulence. Elastic is sewn around the waist and both legs.

The removable filter - which looks similar to the shoulder pads placed in women's clothing - is made of charcoal sandwiched between two layers of Australian sheep's wool.

Buck says the charcoal filter isn't too bulky but could capture the bad-smelling gas and allow the non-smelling gas - hydrogen and oxygen - to pass through.

It was developed from gas masks worn by coal miners, reports the Denver Post.

They come as boxer shorts for men and panties for women and sell for $24.95 (£18). Replacement filters cost about £7. They are sold with the motto: "Wear them for the ones you love."

The Weimars say flatulence is still a touchy subject for most people. Almost every sale has come via their site.

[MysticNacho]

Wow, Trask, can you imagine?! You could stroll into a crowded room and just let one rip. The loudest, most disgusting rocket poot you've ever heard. No holds barred. Just let that sucker fly. Conversation in the room stops, eyes go wide, people stare, some run for cover. You raise your arms triumphantly, and shout "NOBODY PANIC!! I'm wearing my new flatulence free undies!! "

A brief pause to let that statement sink in ensues, and people realize the noticable lack of odor in the room. Now, the way I see it, one of two things could happen. The people either maul you alive for your lack of manners, or declare you a hero for averting a surely horrendous aroma.

Sounds like some risk, but I say its worth it buddy. Better order a dozen. Social outcast or hero, its your call. Sure, you say, you might get clubbed to death with pointy sticks are something like that. But then they might declare another feast day in your honor as well. Now thats glory! Do us all a favor anyway.

[Bug]

All well and good but if it were preceeded by a sound you would have time to exit or at least open a window. What I hate are those girls who think that just because you can't hear it, it won't singe your nostrils. I always like to say something. Like "Oh good. Even tho it's our first date, you're comfortable enough with me to fart. I've been holding this one for fuckin ever."