willstrickland

quote: Originally posted by Dru: "We could be in a bar right now drinking beer" Said at many a miserable alpine bivi. But not on wall bivys, because after the "we could be in a bar bit" Someone just says "Hey, we are in a bar...the Crusty Butt Saloon" and whips out the stash of King Cobra/Guiness/Boddingtons/Old English.

Druuude, I wish my haiku skills had reached that level! I got them via e-mail from a NW version of a redneck. The Desire and Impounded ones were especially impressive.

A little southern literary expose' for y'all DESIRE Damn, in that tube-top You make me almost forget That you're my cousin BEAUTY Naked in repose Silvery silhouette girls Adorn my mudflaps REMORSE A painful sadness Can't fit big screen TV through Double-wide's front door DEPRIVED In WalMart toy aisle Wailing boy wants wrestling doll Mama whups his butt DEPRIVED (alternate ending by Scoopy Jr) In WalMart toy aisle Wailing boy wants wrestling doll Mama puts smack down OPTIONS Unemployment's out. Hey, maybe I can get on Disability BLAZE Distant siren screams Dumb-ass Verne's been playing with Gasoline again A NEW MOON Flashlights pierce darkness No nightcrawlers to be found Guess we'll gig some frogs EXUBERANCE Joyous, playful, bright Trailer park girl rolls in puddle Of old motor oil ALONE Seeking solitude Carl's ex-wife Tammy files for Restraining order HATRED I curse the rainbow Emblazoned upon his hood God damn Jeff Gordon OFFERINGS Tonight we hunger Grandma sent grocery money To Jimmy Swaggart DRAMA Set the VCR Dukes of Hazzard Marathon At 9 O'Clock NO SIGNAL White noise, buzzing static Call Earl; satellite dish needs new descrambler IMPOUNDED Sixty-five dollars And cyclone fence keeps me from My El Camino GATHERING In early morning mist Mama searches Circle K for Moon Pies and Red Man

...but it was only a diversion from climbing. Ever since my good climbing companion Pierre GU-Bie died soloing on the Petit GU, I questioned my motives. An ever growing rage enveloped me and I returned to GU eating at the highest level, climbing the Petit GU solo with only two packs of GU as a tribute to Pierre....

Twight...the next level: So I said to myself, "A kick in the head is only food for thought! Kick me in the head again you big burly icefall, you cannot define me! I define the very essence of conciousness through my anguish!" Then we started racking up. Since Backes and I started going ultra-light I'd revised the strategy to a razor honed efficiency...if you can't do it with GU, shut up and get off my fucking mountain. We decided that clothes were superfluous, we just applied a liberal covering of GU to our bodies. No longer needing a pack, we simply strapped a titanium pot to our heads for a helmet and set off soloing with 60cm axes crafted from frozen GU. As the handles melt, we suck down the GU trickle and re-freeze them in the snow as necessary for proper grip characteristics. When we stop to brew up, we just scrape off a handful of GU and set a match to it, plop the helmet pot on top, brew and then hydrate. I am growing my hair long again so I can store more GU in it and retain a stylish doo throughout the climb. Harnesses aren't necessary as we don't use ropes. There's no stopping to eat, just take a lick of the nearest appendage and keep cranking. All you other gumbies stuck in the same old system are stagnant, adopt the GU light and sticky approach or be a poser like everyone else. When the climb is over, relish the agony of ripping all the hair from your body when you remove the remaining GU, it assures you that you are alive. Ideally though, there should only be a minute amount of GU left or you didn't plan properly. UNDERSTAND?!!??!!

Hey Aidan, Start talking to your folks now in preparation for next summer. Try to cut some deal with them where if you do such and such, they'll agree to let you go somewhere that you can just hang and climb all summer. Just hold up your end of the bargain. I'm sure you could find all sorts of folks who would talk with your folks to reassure them. Let them know that climbing is really your passion, and your biggest dream at the moment is to spend a summer in Squamish, Yosemite, wherever, to stay in shape, learn about nature, and not sit around rotting on the couch in the AC all summer. Use those words...dreams, learning, maybe even go so far as to draw up some kind of learning plan...edible plants, wildlife of the sierra, geology, some history of the area. A whole season in an area gives you plenty of downtime, you need to rest even if you're just climbing mellow stuff. That will give you plenty of time to take pictures and make a plant log, visit the local interpretive centers, etc. I'd say you have a much better chance at pulling it off that way then by just trying to find a partner for the whole season or something. Big destination places like Yosemite are where the full-timers congregate because 1. Of course the climbing is phenomenal, but 2. Partners are easy to come by. Parents are weird animals, but if you get your game plan together ahead of time, and have a well thought-out presentation for them (think of it as a business pitch) they might just buy it. Be professional, use a powerpoint presentation, posterboards with learning plan outline, whatever it takes. I'd certainly be willing to consult with you on the side, I've taught high-school level natural sciences and done extensive presentations/public speaking etc. I guarantee that if you blow them away with the maturity and professionalism of a presentation, they will give your pitch a much closer look...because they will see your growing maturity through your committment to your goals.

quote: Originally posted by OfficeSpace: Yossarian, If you loafers were as hard as you talk you would all be in the latest climbing mag. Here, some of you guys rant about some multi pitch 5.8 alpine route as if you climbed the Eiger! Uhhh, hey man, I was in the latest climbing mag, Aug issue of R&I as an author....does that make me hard? NOT EVEN CLOSE! In fact, it makes me a profiteer from our noble pastime, only one step above the companies trying to convince you that you need to spend more money on the newest climbing fasionwear. I wrote it for 4 reasons: 1. I needed some money 2. I wanted to have a national publication on my doctoral school application resume. 3. The editor asked me to write it. 4. I needed the money. And what the hell do grades have to do with anything? Probably half of my 20 favorite climbs are long rock routes that go at 5.8 Pingora in the Winds...5.8 and fabulous, Complete Exum Ridge...5.7 and the most outstanding 5.7 route I've climbed, Nutcracker...sweet and interesting at 5.8, Snake Dike...fun and runout with only one stretch of 5.7, The Mummy in Linville Gorge..mellow 5.5 with great position. Skyline Traverse-Seneca 5.3...amazing exposure. All are among the most memorable climbs I've done, and I've done a fair mix of things around the US.

Dru, give me a little credit, I'd be on the road bike eh! Maybe get one of those kiddie trailers and stuff him in there...right next to the bong

Whadya think? Best name for a brew you've seen? Pike Kilt Lifter? Old Bongwater Porter?

quote: Originally posted by Jman: Try again. Your middle phrase only has 6 syllables. Damn it! I suck monkeybutt. Once more: Wills writing sucks ass That bastard can't even count Stick to climbing dude That works I think...

Dude, just eliminate the crampons altogether, file your toenails to a point, be a real man...then when snow balls up, just wiggle your toes.

So what ever happened to the big shindig idea? Weekly pub gatherings are great but what about all us non-Seattlites or Seattlonians or whatever the hell you call yourselves up there, we need some lovin' too. We'd like to toast with you (double entendre, no?!) too

I'll try again In drunken boxing We no use haiku speak We kick haiku ass better? [This message has been edited by willstrickland (edited 07-26-2001).]

I thought it could also be 7-9-7 or 3-5-3, maybe my grade school teacher was syllably challeneged...

quote: Originally posted by Dru: Canada is good Yankee beer is second rate We have good bud too. Haiku rebuttal: Oregon is much better Portland beer is the finest around Our bud is extra dank too [This message has been edited by willstrickland (edited 07-26-2001).]

quote: Originally posted by Yossarian: Can you please be more specific on the brand of bleach bottle you used and the type of scissors? A diagram would be helpful. Here's a diagram for you

I hear alot of talk about balling and anti-bots, what will fit what, etc. Here's the easy solution: 1. Go to the laundry room,laudramat, etc and find an empty bleach bottle. 2. Open your toolbox and get out some small zip-ties and your wire cutters. 3. Open that drawer in the desk and get out the scissors. 4. Cut out four big squares from the bleach bottle. Trim them to fit the forefoot and heel sections of the crampons. 5. Make small 1/4" slits around the perimiter of the squares, keep the slits about a 1/4" from the edge of the square. 6. Thread the zip ties through the slits and around the crampon frame. Pull them tight and snip off the excess.Make sure the "ratchet" part of the zip tie is on the outside (closest to the ground when using them) of the crampon and plastic. Viola! Very light, very tough, very inexpensive anti-bot plates that can easily be replaced and work extremely well. Other types of plastic bottles will work, but the bleach bottles seem to be more flexible and lighter than the others.

I've been using neoprene gloves almost identical to the Glacier Gloves that I bought at Wal-Mart or K-Mart or something for about $10. They are a lovely shade of camoflauge, but I can't argue with the price. The palms are covered with some rubberized stuff that is WAY grippy. You might take a look at them, I've found that carrying them along with a fat pair of mittens for belays or bivys works well for me.

It got bolted They got warned It got chopped [This message has been edited by willstrickland (edited 07-26-2001).]

[This message has been edited by willstrickland (edited 07-26-2001).]

Yeah Bronco, that's a good one. Some other good reading in the simplicity/downshifting area are "The Overworked American: The unexpected decline of lesiure..." by Harvard economist Juliet Schor; "Voluntary Simplicity" by Duane Elgin; "The Simple Living Handbook" by Janet Luhrs, and "Chop Wood, Carry Water", which is a collection. Finally, there was a PBS series a while back called "Affluenza" which investigated the growth of consumer culture in the US and the myth of happiness through affluence.

quote: Originally posted by lambone: Hey Will, 1. Isn't that you clipping that fat bolt in Rock and Ice this month? 2. What's up "all a rounder"? You to cool for bolts now? 3. So you threw away your TV, big deal...Why didn't you donate it to the Salvation Army? 4. Keep in mind that your quest for "spiritual development" and "plaing" are privliges of White Middle Class Americans who have the luxury of selling their car so he can concentrate on climbing more... 5. But really, I'm curious... How does ripping bolts out of a rock help you "improve yourself"? 6. And who are you to judge which bolts should be ripped out and which shouldn't? More importantly, how does it help others? Sounds like a selfish endevor to me. Ok, 'bone I'll have a go at these. 1. No, that is not me clipping the bolt in the picture, as stated in the caption, that is Sam Elmore, who actually does resemble me a bit, or me him, or whatever... 2. Yeah, the all-arounder thing was funny, a direct product of R&I's editors making my original text more "print worthy" 3. TV worked, but required a good fist slam on top to get the picture going most of the time, didn't seem like something anyone would want. 4. Don't give me that white middle class shit. I grew up in a lower class single parent home, put myself through undergrad and grad school, have no outside financial support, truck was being paid for via loan so I didn't profit other than the equity which was due more to a shrewd business deal on my part than on paying off much of the loan. And a quote attributed to Beck put it nicely : "at either end of the social spectrum there lies a leisure class" 5. By upholding the ethic that I know beyond doubt is the proper one. Standing up for what I believe in, respecting the natural resources, etc 6. In this case it was a no-brainer, and I was far from being alone in judging that those bolts should have been removed. Of all the routes I've chopped (4 and counting) all were retro-jobs which were easily top-ropable. How does it help others? By restoring the aesthetics of the area (blank sweep of rock rather than shiny line of steel) and by restoring a real climbing challenge rather than a psuedo-challenge which is no different than an outdoor climbing gym. No offense taken to your comments, I can understand where you're coming from. And keep in mind that simplicity doesn't necessarily mean eating rice 3 meals a day and only owning a robe and bowl, it means evaluating the time committments that every "thing" requires (time to maintain it, time to work to pay for it) and deciding if it is truly worth that time. Material goods are a carrot on a stick deal, because unless you NEED something to survive it only satisfies a WANT and wants are infinitely expandable. -Will

This discussion about the DDD restoration got me thinking. As I dive farther and farther into the climbing life, my ethics evolve and my lifestyle changes. I find myself trying to say more by saying less, and to subsitute action for ego. Eight years ago I threw my TV in the dumpster. It was wasting time I could use to improve myself. Six years ago I stopped buying "fashionable" clothes and used surplus, thrift, and outlet stores, the less I spend the less time I owe to others. Four years ago I eliminated housing from the equation and lived out of tents and hostels for almost a year. Two years ago I lived out of a vehicle for almost two years year while holding an 8 on - 6 off job and climbing on the off days. I sold my truck last week and now rely on a road bike, mt bike, and public transit. I do all of this to remove the excess shit from my life so I can concentrate on climbing, training, spiritual development, and just plain playing. We are so rich in this country that the basics (food shelter clothing) are easily covered. Time is the most valuable asset we have and the current system requires us to lock our future time up in the management of debt. In climbing I've gone from clipping bolts to chopping bolts. I've gone from having a hard sport route as a typical project to having scary wall routes and hard offwidths as projects. As my exposure to areas around the country has grown, my disgust with the current trends of climbing has grown. I've gone from passing by a retro-job and saying "that's a shame, people shouldn't do that" to getting off my ass and correcting the transgression. I've gone from looking at established difficulties for a challenge (A2, A3 and on up the scale) to creating my own challenges by attempting (and failing most of the time)first clean ascents of established nailing routes. The point of all this is that the more I remove, the richer my life seems. I have less things to maintain, and more time. I seek value in relationships and adventures rather than material goods. I live in the present rather than playing the "I'll be happy when..." game. And, I spend more time climbing things I never imagined I would than sitting around thinking "if I just get those new axes I'll be able to climb better". It's about time, time on the rock, time on the mountain. Good gear is nice, and most of my gear is quality stuff, but there is no substitute for an investment of time. Having 500 pitches of 5.8 leads under your belt will do much more for you than having $500 of new cams on your rack... Just a ramble, nothing more, but I'm interested in your stories. Sacrifices you've made and continue to make, the value you've found in structuring your life around your climbing rather than the other way around.

quote: Originally posted by Jman: But you know what's best about him? He never stops drinking. Just beer after beer after beer... Kinda like Dwayner huh?

quote: Originally posted by EV: Wil: Good post. Eliminating excess from one's life is often good - the less, the better. Also, nice article in the recent Rock and Ice on Portland. Getting rid of excess is good unless it's an excessively long crack route! Man, this route in Zion called Tricks of the Trade has a phenomenal hand crack that's gotta be at least 400 continuous feet of primarily perfect hands on a vertical wall. and about that article, thanks! I'm just waiting for the "does it bother anyone that a guy from Georgia via Utah is writing a climbing article about Portland" stuff to start.