Be Wary of Aggressive Baked Goods!!!!

[Greg_W]

I decided I needed some of those little mini-donuts this morning (powdered sugar), so I swung by the Shell station whilst out running errands. I was completely unaware of the violent confrontation to come.

 

I got back to my desk and prepared to consume the cute little fried confections. All innocent and white, they didn't appear violent, or riddled with pent up angst. Well, I'll tell you, these little fuckers strike while th iron is hot; that's for damn sure. No sooner had I torn open the plastic covering, and the first little fucker jumps...yes, JUMPS...right off the little cardboard thingy and makes a dive for my femoral artery. Who knew they had such knowledge of human anatomy? Anyway, this bastard was making his way towards my certain doom. Thinking quickly, I grasped that misguided little baked goods freedom fighter and popped him in my mouth. He died well...I didn't hear him make a sound as my mandibles crushed life from his limb-less fried dough body.

 

Whew, I don't think I can work anymore today.

 

Greg_W

[willstrickland]

Firearms, donuts...Greg I think you have a promising future in Law Enforcement!

[iain]

That ain't sugar on those donuts homeboy. Enough anthrax to raise a threat level or two. CODE ORANGE! CODE MF'iNG ORANGE BLEHEAHAAAAAH drool...etc.

[lummox]

man. i ate like a half box of entemanns donut holes along with a couple cups of coffee for breakfast yesterday. it was a mistake. dexedrine hardly compares.

[RuMR]

Firearms, donuts...Greg I think you have a promising future in Law Enforcement!

 

but those earrings??? Those'll just trash his image as RoboCop...