tales of useless help

[lummox]

there was this one time when my buddy and i wanted to go ice climbing. we was gonna use his truck but it was stuck in the snow and ice on the sloping parking lot at his apartment building. we proceeded to get it more stuck and half sideways with the spinning of tires and pushing and you know. so his neighbor comes out with a small box of snow melt salt to 'help' us.

'thanks dude'.

we didnt go climbing that day.

[allthumbs]

STFU

[lummox]

[allthumbs]

your old lady has large hands

[ScottP]

I once hit a small dog with my car and through a series of bizarre events, it ended up biting me on both thumbs before it died(I shit you not.) I asked some of the neighborhood onlookers for a place to wash my hands, and all I got was an empty bottle of Bactine. Apparently the mutt was rather beloved by the crowd, whereas I was not.

[allthumbs]

that's par

[HRoark]

I got into a car accident with a young black girl, in a black neighborhood. Turns out she was the local preacher's daughter...I was worried big time.

[lummox]

I got into a car accident with a young black girl, in a black neighborhood. Turns out she was the local preacher's daughter...I was worried big time.

why were you worried? cause you use the same expressions as dick cheney?

[HRoark]

I got into a car accident with a young black girl, in a black neighborhood. Turns out she was the local preacher's daughter...I was worried big time.

why were you worried? cause you use the same expressions as dick cheney?

 

Well, let's see, I'm very white and she was black, I was on their turf, and people in the Midwest take their racism very seriously (on both sides of the fence).

 

As far as expressions that Dick Cheney uses, I have no fucking idea what you are talking about. The girl was black, or colored if you prefer that one. Whatever.

[Thinker]

I got into a car accident with a young black girl, in a black neighborhood. Turns out she was the local preacher's daughter...I was worried big time.

 

what were you doing with a young preacher's daughter in your car in the first place?

[lummox]

Whatever.

mmkay howard. thanks for clearing that up.

[HRoark]

I got into a car accident with a young black girl, in a black neighborhood. Turns out she was the local preacher's daughter...I was worried big time.

 

what were you doing with a young preacher's daughter in your car in the first place?

 

No, dude, she was coming through an intersection from my right (in her own car) and I T-boned her.

[allthumbs]

bullshit. we all know you'd been fucking her in the backseat before the accident. come clean, bitch

[HRoark]

bullshit. we all know you'd been fucking her in the backseat before the accident. come clean, bitch

 

So, the whiplash could have come from something else? Is that what you're saying? Maybe I blocked out that memory; yeah, you could be right. Who's to know.