Connecting to the rock

[Sherri]

 

Being a big name climber myself, I make it a point not to climb with the commoners.

That said, once a year I draw a name out of my solid gold chamberpot and call the lucky soul and he/she is swears an oath and signs a contract to never reveal the sacred location of my mountain lair.

Upon meeting I fingerprint and run a quick credit/background check and we are off!

Their magic day is spent belaying me while I scrub moss and trundle rocks all around them with nary a word, as is clearly stated in my preclimb contract. Finally, I send them up one of the classics and shout important beta at the top of my lungs until they fall or quit.

Hiking out, I like to stay several steps ahead of them, in case a random hiker stumbles upon us as I don't want to be seen carrying ropes, gear, shovels, rakes and implements of destruction.

At he car, I rave about the great time we had climbing and promise to call, after they leave I delete their phone number, safe for another year.

:lmao:

[archenemy]

I connect using full-body magneto stretchy form suction .

 

See attached.

 

[RuMR]

and all this time i thought some dry humping was going on!

[archenemy]

No one photographed that part. I had to set down the camera.

[RuMR]

no self porn?? WTF!?!

[kevinoregon]

Should we all pack solo gear for every outing just in case our prospective partner decides not to show?

 

Should always. Never know when the slimeball won't show or can't go.

[Bug]

Should we all pack solo gear for every outing just in case our prospective partner decides not to show?

 

Should always. Never know when the slimeball won't show or can't go.

So you don't ever do long alpine routes that require careful packing?

Nope.

Can't convince me that this is the answer.