lummox Posted August 17, 2003 Posted August 17, 2003 You Live in California when... 1. You make over $250,000 and you still can't afford to buy a house. 2. The fastest part of your commute is going down your driveway. 3. You know how to eat an artichoke. 5. You drive your rented Mercedes to your neighbourhood block party. You Live in New York City when... 1. You say "the city" and expect everyone to know you mean Manhattan. 2. You have never been to the Statue of Liberty or the Empire State Building. 3. You can get into a four-hour argument about how to get from Columbus Circle to Battery Park, but can't find Wisconsin on a map. 4. You think Central Park is "nature," 5. You believe that being able to swear at people in their own language makes you multi-lingual. 6. You've worn out a car horn. 7. You think eye contact is an act of aggression. You Live in Maine when... 1. You only have four spices: salt, pepper, ketchup, and Tabasco. 2. Halloween costumes fit over parkas. 3. You have more than one recipe for moose. 4. Sexy lingerie is anything flannel with less than eight buttons. 5. The four seasons are: winter, still winter, almost winter, and construction. You Live in the Deep South when... 1. You can rent a movie and buy bait in the same store. 2. "ya'll" is singular and "all ya'll" is plural. 3. After five years you still hear, "You ain't from 'round here, are Ya?" 4. "He needed killin'" is a valid defence. 5. Everyone has 2 first names: Billy Bob, Jimmy Bob, Mary Sue, Betty Jean, etc. You live in Colorado when... 1. You carry your $3,000 mountain bike atop your $500 car. 2. You tell your husband to pick up Granola on his way home and he stops at the day care centre. 3. A pass does not involve a football or dating. 4. The top of your head is bald, but you still have a pony tail. You live in the Midwest when... 1. You've never met any celebrities, but the mayor knows your name. 2. Your idea of a traffic jam is ten cars waiting to pass a tractor. 3. You have had to switch from "heat" to "A/C" on the same day. 4. You end sentences with a preposition: "Where's my coat at?" 5. When asked how your trip was to any exotic place, you say, "It was different!" You live in Florida when... 1. You eat dinner at 4:15 in the afternoon. 2. All purchases include a coupon of some kind -- even houses and cars. 3. Everyone can recommend an excellent dermatologist. 4. Road construction never ends anywhere in the state. 5. Cars in front of you are often driven by headless people. wtf? no portland or seattle or vancouver anecdotes? Quote
Sphinx Posted August 17, 2003 Posted August 17, 2003 You live in Seattle if: 1. You switch to shorts when it's 55 degrees, but you keep your jacket on. 2. You wear sandals with socks. In March. 3. There is a cc.com pub club location 5 blocks from your house. 4. You go skiing in rain with 50 mph winds and call it 'good conditions'. 5. You spray on cc.com Quote
Ratboy Posted August 17, 2003 Posted August 17, 2003 You know you live in Washington when... 1. GoreTex is considered a fashion staple. 2. You count trees in your circle of friends. 3. There are 2 seasons -- raining and not raining. 4. Half the license plates on the road are from other states. 5. Moss is considered good roofing insulation. 6. Grocery stores have built-in coffee shops. 7. You have A/C in your car but not your house. 8. Having a tan makes you stand out in a crowd. 9. You have something made of fleece other than a jacket. 10. You divide the state geographically into wet and dry sides. Quote
lummox Posted August 17, 2003 Author Posted August 17, 2003 you live in portland when: 1: your t-shirts have mildew spots on em. 2: its cool to hang out at the bookstore. 3: your often wet and dehydrated at the same time. more? Quote
MissNormandy Posted August 18, 2003 Posted August 18, 2003 You live in Vancouver when... 1. You can blame all your nasty farts on Camas 2. Your kid comes home from school one day and he can speak Russian Quote
lummox Posted August 18, 2003 Author Posted August 18, 2003 you live in squamish when 1: you reckon you had a GREAT weekend with your 40 or 50 best buddies beating the shit outa pathetic white boys from washington. eh guy? Quote
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