Scott_J Posted February 12, 2003 Share Posted February 12, 2003 A drunk staggers into a Catholic Church, enters a Confessional Box, sits down but says nothing. The Priest coughs a few times to get his attention, but the drunk just sits there. Finally the Priest pounds three times on the wall. The drunk replies, "Ain't no use knockin'. There's no paper on this side either..." Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
allthumbs Posted February 12, 2003 Share Posted February 12, 2003 Bwahahaha Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
glacierdog Posted February 12, 2003 Share Posted February 12, 2003 har har har! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cracked Posted February 12, 2003 Share Posted February 12, 2003 After the penguin's car starts billowing black smoke from the tailpipe, he takes it into the shop. "This'll take a few minutes," says the mechanic, "why don't you go down to the Baskin Robbins and get something to eat." The penguin walks back to the garage with a vanilla cone, which since he doesn't have a tongue, must dip his beak in it to eat it. He meets the mechanic in front of the building. "Well, it looks like you blew a seal." "No...it's just ice cream" This one's mandatory. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cracked Posted February 12, 2003 Share Posted February 12, 2003 Cracked: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Off_White Posted February 12, 2003 Share Posted February 12, 2003 A hippie gets onto a bus and sits next to a nun in the front seat. The hippie looks over and asks the nun if she would have sex with him. The nun surprised by the question politely declines and gets off the bus at the next stop. When the bus starts on it's way the driver says to the hippie, "I can tell you how you can get that nun to have sex with you". The hippie says that he'd love to know, so the bus driver tells him that every Tuesday evening at midnight the nun goes to the cemetery and pray's to God. If you went dressed in a robe and glow in the dark paint mask she would think you are god and you could command her to have sex with you. The hippie decides this is a great idea, so on Tuesday he goes to the cemetery and waits for the nun to show up. At midnight sure enough the nun showed up, while she was in the middle of praying the hippie jumped out from hiding and says. "I AM GOD" I have heard your prayers and I will answer them BUT ... first you must have sex with me. The nun agrees but asks for anal sex so she might keep her virginity because she is married to the church. The hippie agrees to this and has his way with the nun. After the hippie finishes he stands up and rips off the mask and shouts "Ha, Ha Ha I'm the hippie!!" Then the nun jumps up and shouts "Ha Ha Ha I'm the bus driver!!" Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
glacierdog Posted February 12, 2003 Share Posted February 12, 2003 Ha ha, silly hippie. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Scott_J Posted February 12, 2003 Author Share Posted February 12, 2003 That was rich. hahahaha Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
johnny_destiny Posted February 12, 2003 Share Posted February 12, 2003 Rabbi and a priest are on an airplane debating Judaism and Catholicism when suddenly the plane lurches, slowly fills with smoke. The pilot tells the passengers to prepare for an emergency landing. The plane makes a rough landing, the crew gets everone off the plane via the emergency exits and all appears well. The priest walks up to the rabbi and proudly states, "I see my theories on religion had an efect on you. I saw you making the sign of the cross after we exited the plane." The rabbi is taken aback and says, "Vhat cross? I vas yust shecking for spectacles, testicles, vallet and vatch!" Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Off_White Posted February 12, 2003 Share Posted February 12, 2003 What is the biggest problem for an atheist? No one to talk to during orgasm. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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