tvashtarkatena

Fortunately for the northeast, certain forward looking president reconstituted the smoldering remains of a FEMA that a certain dumb-as-a-post president gutted. Compare the disaster response for Sandy and Katrina. LEADERSHIP.

I think I'll walk a few precincts right here at home to try to make sure your dumb ass side loses instead, thanks. Got about 700 infrequent voters to bug the shit out of before Tue.

Everyone 'needs' to do precisely nothing here, but a lack of repetition, a hint of originality, and a spoonful of humor is always appreciated.

Don't get me wrong, I actually like Mitt. I mean, you can just FEEL how REAL he is. He sees our biggest problems and takes 'em head on: global warming, the worst income inequity of any developed nation, wall street corruption, unsustainable agriculture, education, foreclosures, joblessness, the worst health care system of any developed nation, disaster relief, too small a Navy, a social security system that's going to go bankrupt sometime beyond my lifetime, preventing gays from marrying, denying women the right to choose their own future. PRIORITIES.

Ya lay your dick down on a butcher block often enough and it tends to get shorter.

Accelerating far faster than most scientists predicted as more feedback loops reveal themselves. In the news just this week: Permafrost deeper and melting faster than estimated. Total carbon to be released > all the carbon in the atmosphere today. Siberian larches giving way to non-deciduous evergreens = lower albedo in winter across millions of square miles. Ocean temperatures of the P-T mass extinction of 40C - 10 C HIGHER than expected, creating a dead zone over half of the earth's surface - for five million years - where only a handful of species could survive. Increased fresh water into oceans changing major ocean currents much faster than expected. Huge tiaga fires - a new phenomenon. I was up there in N Alberta for some of that fun last year. Pine beetle die offs accelerating faster than expected, turning forests from carbon sinks to emitters. But hey, it's natural...we'll just adapt. At least that's what one political party believes. Neither party can do shit about the problem until the bowl full of idiots who has opted out of the Age of Reason either a) is voted out of power across the board or b) reforms its stupidity. Neither seems imminent. LEADERSHIP.

Did you two break up or something?

My guess is that Christie is smart enough to know who's probably gonna be prez again for the next 4 years, as well as smart enough to know that the GOP is fundamentally fucked by Teabaggers for the foreseeable future. He also realizes his austerity approach only increased unemployment in NJ - this is a great opportunity to make a break from the idiocy. He's using his GOP Darling status (the guy can pretty much do whatever the fuck he wants to without retribution) to forge his own bipartisan path, given how dead end his party's current obstructionist approach is in the face of real problems. Finally, he's probably just plain tired of all the fucking douchebags on his side of the aisle. That, and he may actually realize that Obama really has been and still is a great president for these hard times. There never was any chance that the Big O would be wildly popular. Hard times mean partial, slow progress - particularly when you've got a congress who's whole schtick is to not show up for work, then blame the Prez for the inaction. American the Infantile cries when Baby doesn't get what Baby wants right away, and that would include the extremes of both Right and Left. So, Christie's a fat fuck (obviously), but he's become a much more interesting fat fuck in recent days. All of the above is probably complete and utter bullshit, of course.

Poor Blondi. Voof!

"Holy shit Martha, that's our last can of Kreamed Korn! Call the GOP Relief Hotline!" LEADERSHIP.

Cuz that's what disaster relief organizations need - more canned food! Certainly not money donations, adequate funding, or political support. SOS: Send Onion Soup! Cuz canz are the first thing to get ruint by flooding. Mmmm mmmm GOOD. I feel better just THINKING about sending some expired petfood for poor people I'd never dream of eating myself! COMMUNITY.

Nope! Too fun! When we want the FOX opinion, we'll know where to click, so feel free to STFU in general, SandyKunt!

It's always best to take a wait and see attitude with flooding. Wait till the water recedes, then say "See? What's the big deal?"

John Frieh, ladies and gentlemen. POLYMATH.

Fewer Blogs, more Talk Radio! VET IT.

A helpful reminder from a NWHiker who advocates NO SUBSIDIES OF ANY KIND: "People have been cooperating freely for all of human history. Yes, others have caused problems due to anti social behavior...wars, theft, violence, etc. But work to reduce these, and cooperation flows freely because we're social animals." NO PhD REQUIRED.

Over 2 centuries of Big Government and what have we got to show for it? A few overpriced parks, some rickety bridges, and Solyndra. THANKS A LOT. As the Depression and Katrina proved, WE CAN TAKE CARE OF OURSELVES, THANK YOU VERY MUCH. There's nothing that nature or anybody else can through at us that good ole American Exceptionalism can't handle...without a hand out. Hey New Jersey - take swim lessons! Or just use your governor for a flotation device!

And here everyone's scratching their heads on how to get housing starts going again. HELLO. Let 85 mph winds create the demand for ya! Let's blow the roof right offa this suckah! We should provide tax breaks for the biggest GHG emitters to pump up those sea surface temps. Oh wait, we already do. Well, more tax breaks, then. Wait again just a goll-darn minute, that's in Mitt's plan already! Ya can't make an omelette...

They key to reducing the deficit is more ships. More Ducks, more cruise ships with extra stabilizers and climate controlled observation decks, more subs with IMAX periscopes. Sure, we spend more than the next 14 countries combined on our military, but once we privatize and monetize it, select investors will make money on every extra dollar we spend so they can hire more (food) service personnel. This is how jobs are created, people. Hey, US Navy: Spice up that drab, Big Government Gray and you've got yourself one helluva fleet of party wagons. More stuff to play with - ASROCs, SAMs, sightseeing choppers, tactical nukes (who wouldn't wanna see one of those bad boyz go off!), than you can shake a balance sheet at. Don't even get me started on what the Air Force could offer! Show me the billionaire psychopath that wouldn't pay a pretty penny to turn that key!

Wheaties. 50 bucks a bowl in the right situation. America deserves strong leadership. We can 5 Point our way out of this. Gimme that spreadsheet.

Privatize hurricanes. Do you know how much people would pay for a cot in a schoolhouse and a can of Beanie Weenies given the right supply/demand situation? Leaving money on the table is stupid, selfish, and frankly, unpatriotic. We're talking job creation, here. Hurricane surf camps alone could rake in millions. Screw the kazoos, lets really monetize those Ducks. Fly through the Eye, The Hurricane Experience Project - Disaster Tourism is born. Work the bugs out and expand into War Tourism. LEVERAGING SUCCESS. I have a Masters Degree, and I approve this message.

Our volunteer church ladies will have the power back up just as soon as they can borrow a ladder. Hey, rent your own rescue chopper, pal!

Well then, I oughta know.

Chris Christie is the Patron Saint of Fat Fucks.

Hopefully ole leave-states-to-fend-for-themselves Mitt will get the Sandy ass fucking by northeast voters he so richly deserves.