an assortment of inanities i still recollect, after a day in the mountains:
ostensible lone dirtbag female re-enters Canada in dirtbag truck = routinely, and systematically cross-examined.
in contrast, dirtbag female in shiny new truck crosses with relative ease.
during one cursory search of trunk:
luwayo: do i fit the profile this month?
guard: unfortunately, there is no profile.
after a near round the clock attempt one february, the Cdn guards got their jollies at 02:00hrs by having me pull my old rig over...searching door panels, interior compartments, engine, etc...not to mention frisking the poor spent dirtbag herself, who was then rendered a hypothermic mass when stripped from superpuffy. <sniff> those heartless brutes!
guard: do you have any large sums of cash?
luwayo: no.
guard: do you know what is a large sum of cash?
luwayo:
the post climb lactic acid stagger does not help your cause.
strategically stacked unwashed polypro will.
guard: where are you going?
luwayo: to snowshoe (oversimplifying often helps).
guard: where is Snowshoe?
luwayo: