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Snifter, Flute & Stein, BarristersMembers of all major Bars (and Taverns)Harvey D. Wallbanger, Managing PartnerThomas J. Collins, Of CounselWe proudly use Summons & Shyster,legal process servers for all the great law firms,including Dewey Cheatham & Howe.Habeas This...

The crusty old managing partner finally passed away, but his firm kept receiving calls asking to speak with him. "I'm sorry, he's dead," was the standard answer. Finally, the receptionist who fielded the calls began to realize it was always the same voice, so she asked who it was and why he kept calling. The reply: "I used to be one of his junior associates, and I just like to hear you say it."

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[ 03-23-2002: Message edited by: trask ]

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THE QUARTERA dad walks into a market followed by his ten-year-old son.The kid is spinning a quarter in the air and catching it between his teeth.

As they walk through the market someone bumps into the boy at just the wrong moment and the coin goes straight into his mouth and lodges in his throat.

He immediately starts choking, going blue in the face, and Dad starts panicking, shouting for help.

A well dressed middle-aged, moderately attractive but serious woman in a blue business suit is sitting at a coffee bar in the market reading hernewspaper and sipping a cup of coffee. At the sound of the commotion, she looks up, puts her coffee cup down on the saucer, neatly folds her newspaper and places it on the counter. Then she gets up from her seat and makes her unhurried way across the market.

Reaching the boy, the woman carefully takes hold of the boy's testicles and squeezes gently at first and then ever more firmly. After a few seconds the boy convulses violently and coughs up the quarter, which the woman deftly catches in herfree hand. Releasing the boy, the woman hands the coin to the father and walks back to her seat in the coffee bar without saying a word. As soon ashe is sure that his son has suffered no lasting ill-effects, the father rushes over to the woman and starts effusively thanking her saying, "I've never seen anybody do anything like that before-it was fantastic. Are you a doctor?"

"Good heavens, no," the woman replies. "I am a Divorce Attorney."

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