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"Halliburton Executive Found Under Bush's Bed - President Claims No Knowledge"

 

"I believe him", said Dick Cheney, former Halliburton CEO. "Back in 1990, all Republican officials were implanted with a module that controlled their actions completely, allowing us to take over the world. The President would have received his at this point. Putting a Halliburton control officer under each Republican's bed is older technology and the President would not have reasonably been expected to know that this person was there."

 

The 72,000 Democratic candidates for President immediately sought to raise taxes in response, claiming that little old ladies and children should also have access to this technology and that Republicans are big meanies to keep it from them.

 

-published by the Washington Times

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