laugh out loud funny

[lummox]

nerve put out some fuckin funny stuff today (like coffee sprayed across the desk funny): http://nerve.com/regulars/quickies/unsexy/

examples: 'Ashton Kutcher. Okay, the backlash started already, but it still hasn't been publicly pointed out that his neck is thicker than his head. Shit like that was genetically selected against a million years ago.'

'Your cats. Attachment to a non-human mammal that doesn't give a fuck about you bespeaks emotional damage. It's the kind that transforms you from "alluringly quirky" to "certifiable."'

 

the 'stud' short story is great too: http://nerve.com/fiction/lowenthal/stud/

[Attitude]

My favorite:

 

33. Lower-back tattooes. Lately, it seems that if there's no faux-Celtic design between your low-rise jeans and your baby tee, something's missing. Recently, we've been seeing girls with their names in thug font in that place. Must save a lot of awkwardness.

 

[lummox]

speaking of body modification:

32. Tongue Rings. You having a tongue ring in 2003 is like us prancing around in eight-ball jackets. After four drinks you'll slur that it makes oral sex feel amazing. It doesn't!

[Metalhead_Mojo]

too funny

[allthumbs]

Burning Man. Thirty-five-year-old men with tattoos and goatees trek into the desert in search of hippie poontang. "Dude! Naked chicks!" By way of preparation, they throw on a String Cheese Incident CD (and take out the Insane Clown Posse) on the long drive from the Valley.

 

[Attitude]

48. Pot. Many people will go on and on about how great stoned sex is. If by “sex,” you mean “eating saltines and watching infomercials,” then you're absolutely right!