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Adiós Varmint


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Twas a fat Coon that had been raiding my neighbors dog food and getting bolder and aggressive. The last straw tonight was when it threatened my neighbor's wife and their 2 year old granddaughter. Chased them into the house. So Bill and I treed the prick and shined the light on him. My first shot dropped him like no tomorrow. He fell 20 feet in a "thump". Had to do a quick followup as he was still kickin'. Get this, he fell dead away into a perk hole that some realtors had dug. It was like he fell right into his own grave. The hole was large and about 2 feet deep, so we just filled it in with dirt, popped a couple Mickeys and had a little funeral ceremony and atta-boy ass slapin'.

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The fucking seals out here are next. I picked up some "seal bombs" from my commercial fishing buddies. When I'm realing in a nice fish and the goddamn seal grabs on, you light them like cherry bombs and throw them in the water. They don't kill the seal, but they definitely fuck up their day.

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Good idea but the game wardens already have it out for me. Got busted last winter for shooting ducks after dark (cost me $250), and a neighborhood bitch that hates me, busted me for shooting a snow goose off my front deck as it flew by in the fog (they couldn't prove that one). Then last year I was busted for fishing with barbed hooks and no lics. and lost my G Loomis rod and Calcutta real, plus $100 fine). So I have to be careful what I kill now, and I fish in the fog and have a faster boat than the fucking Tool wardens. frown.gif

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