RedNose Posted February 14, 2010 Posted February 14, 2010 (edited) A couple has a dog that snores. Annoyed because she can't sleep, the wife goes to the vet to see if he can help. The vet tells the woman to tie a ribbon around the dog's testicles, and he will stop snoring. "Yeah right !" she says.. A few minute after going to bed, the dog begins snoring, as usual. The wife tosses and turns, unable to sleep. Muttering to herself, she goes to the closet and grabs a piece of red ribbon and ties it carefully around the dog's testicles. Sure enough, the dog stops snoring. The woman is amazed... Later that night, her husband returns home drunk from being out drinking with his buddies. He climbs into bed, falls asleep and immediately begins snoring loudly. The woman decides maybe the ribbon might work on him. So, she goes to the closet again, grabs a piece of blue ribbon and ties it around her husband's testicles. Amazingly, it also works on him ! The woman sleeps soundly. The husband wakes from his drunken stupor and stumbles into the bathroom. As he stands in front of the toilet, he glances in the mirror and sees a blue ribbon attached to his privates. He is very confused, and as he walks back into the bedroom, he sees the red ribbon attached to his dog's testicles. He shakes his head, looks at the dog and whispers, "I don't know where we were lad ... or what we did .... but, by God we took FIRST and SECOND place ! Edited February 14, 2010 by RedNose Quote
Doug Posted February 14, 2010 Posted February 14, 2010 RedNose went to get a Physical from the free clinic on Capitol Hill. Hot new male doc. The doc told RedNose that he had to quit masturbating. RedNose asked why and the doc said, "Because I'm trying to examine you." Quote
pink Posted February 14, 2010 Posted February 14, 2010 RedNose went to get a Physical from the free clinic on Capitol Hill. Hot new male doc. The doc told RedNose that he had to quit masturbating. RedNose asked why and the doc said, "Because I'm trying to examine you." so are u saying masturbating is bad? Quote
Doug Posted February 14, 2010 Posted February 14, 2010 only if doing it while the doc is trying to do the exam.... Quote
pink Posted February 14, 2010 Posted February 14, 2010 oh ok then, i was kinda worried that u thought masturbating was bad Quote
RedNose Posted February 14, 2010 Author Posted February 14, 2010 Oh boys you know so little. I'll bet you still suckle your thumb Quote
pink Posted February 14, 2010 Posted February 14, 2010 Oh boys you know so little. I'll bet you still suckle your thumb up hill both ways through 10 feet of snow, blah blah blah. hey rednose. does ur dick hang down to ur knees? Quote
Doug Posted February 14, 2010 Posted February 14, 2010 He needs big guns to kill caribou because he's hung like a fruit bat. Quote
Off_White Posted February 14, 2010 Posted February 14, 2010 What, are you trying to lob Pink a softball just so he'll post that picture again? That was an okay joke ya fish smelling liver fluke, I especially liked that the red and blue ribbon could have had a partisan politics set-up, but it didn't go there. Reminds me of one of my favorites: What is the Frankenstein Monster's favorite cereal? Corn flakes. Quote
RedNose Posted February 14, 2010 Author Posted February 14, 2010 He needs big guns to kill caribou because he's hung like a fruit bat. Arrrrrrr! Fruit bat! That be another kind of Capitol Hill B*tt Pirate. Quote
RedNose Posted February 23, 2010 Author Posted February 23, 2010 Oh boys you know so little. I'll bet you still suckle your thumb up hill both ways through 10 feet of snow, blah blah blah. hey rednose. does ur dick hang down to ur knees? My Norse Ancestors call that a knee knocker! Quote
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