Sex Frogs

[allthumbs]

A beautiful, blonde goes to her local pet store in search

of an exotic pet. As she looks about the store, she

notices a box full of frogs. The sign says: "Sex Frogs!

Only $20 each! Money Back Guarantee! (Comes with

complete instructions)."

 

She looks around to see if anybody's watching her and

whispers softly to the man behind the counter, "I'll take

one."

 

The clerk packages the frog and says, "Just follow the

instructions carefully." The girl nods, grabs the box,

and is quickly on her way home. As soon as she closes the

door to her apartment, the girl takes out the

instructions and reads them thoroughly, doing exactly

what it says to do: 1. Take a shower. 2. Splash on

some nice smelling perfume. 3. Slip into a very sexy

teddy. 4. Crawl into bed and place the frog down on the

bed.

 

She then quickly gets into bed with the frog and, to her

surprise and disappointment, nothing happens! She is

totally frustrated and quite upset at this point. She

rereads the instructions and notices that at the bottom

of the paper it says, "If you have any problems or

questions, please call the pet store."

 

So, she calls the pet store. The clerk says, "I had some

complaints earlier today. I'll be right over." Within

five minutes, he is ringing her doorbell.

 

The lady welcomes him in and says, " I've done everything

according to the instructions and the damn thing just

sits there."

 

The man, looking very concerned, picks up the frog,

stares directly into its eyes and sternly says: "Listen

to me! I'm only going to show you how to do this one

more time!"

 

[lummox]

A man and woman meet at a bar. They get along so well that they decide to go back to the woman's place.

A few drinks later, the guy takes off his shirt and then washes his hands. He then takes of his trousers and washes his hands again.

 

Watching him, the woman says, "You must be a dentist."

 

Surprised, the guy responds, "Yes... how did you figure that out?"

 

"Easy," she replies, "you keep washing your hands."

 

One thing leads to another and they make love. Once they're done, the woman says, "You must be a really good dentist."

 

The guy, now with a boosted ego, says, "Well yes, I am a good dentist. How did you figure that out?"

 

"Didn't feel a thing!"

 

 

[chelle]