glacierdog Posted March 4, 2003 Posted March 4, 2003 David Letterman: "France wants more evidence [of Iraqi violations]. The last time France wanted more evidence, it rolled right through France with a German flag." Jay Leno: "I don't know why people are surprised that France won't help us get Saddam out of Iraq. After all, France wouldn't help us get the Germans out of France!" Rep. Roy Blunt, R-Mo.: "Do you know how many Frenchmen it takes to defend Paris? It's not known, it's never been tried." Blunt again: "Somebody was telling me about the French Army rifle that was being advertised on eBay the other day -- the description was: 'Never shot. Dropped once.'" "Do you know it only took Germany three days to conquer France in World War II? And that's because it was raining," said John Xereas, manager of the DC Improv. "Going to war without France is like going duck hunting without your accordion." ---Donald Rumsfeld, U.S. Secretary of De fense "As far as I'm concerned, war always means failure" ---Jacques Chirac, President of France ........... "As far as France is concerned, you're right." ---Rush Limbaugh, Doctor of Democracy A Frenchman, an Englishman and Claudia Schiffer were sitting together in a carriage in a train going through Provence, when the train went through a tunnel. Being an old style train, there were no lights and it went completely dark. Then came a kissing noise and the sound of a really loud slap. When the train exited the tunnel, Claudia and the Englishman were sitting as if nothing had happened and the Frenchman had his hand against his face as if he had been slapped. The Frenchman was thinking: 'The Englishman must have kissed Claudia and she missed him and slapped me instead.' Claudia was thinking: 'The Frenchmen must have tried to kiss me and actually kissed the Englishman and got slapped for it.' And the Englishman was thinking: Great! The next time the train goes through a tunnel I'll make another kissing noise and slap that French bastard again.' An old saying: Raise your right hand if you like the French.... Raise both hands if you ARE French. Q: Why are there so many tree-lined boulevards in France? A: Germans like to march in the shade Quote
Greg_W Posted March 4, 2003 Posted March 4, 2003 CLASSIC!!! Especially about the Germans liking to march in the shade. Quote
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