Sphinx Posted June 5, 2003 Posted June 5, 2003 A young man walks up and sits down at the bar. "What can I get you?" the bartender inquires. "I want 6 shots of Jagermeister," responded the young man. "6 shots?!? Are you celebrating something?" "Yeah, my first blowjob." "Well, in that case, let me give you a 7th on the house." "No offense bartender , but if 6 shots won't get rid of the taste, nothing will." Three men, a doctor, a lawyer, and a biker, were sitting in a bar talking over a few drinks. After a sip of his martini, the doctor said, "You know, tomorrow is my anniversary. I bought my wife a diamond ring and a new Mercedes. I figure if she doesn't like the diamond ring, then at least she will like the Mercedes, and she will know that I love her." After finishing his scotch, the lawyer said, "Well, on my last anniversary, I bought my wife a string of pearls and a trip to the Bahamas. I figured if she didn't like the pearls, then at least she would have enjoyed the trip, and she would have known that I loved her." The Biker then took a big swig from his beer, and said, "Yeah, well for my anniversary, I got my old lady a t-shirt and a vibrator. I figured if she didn't like the t-shirt, then she could go fuck herself." Three men had a very late night drinking Guinness. They left in the early morning hours and went home their separate ways. The next day, they all met for an early pint, and compared notes about who was drunker the night before. The first guy claims that he was the most drunk, saying, "I drove straight home and walked into the house. As soon as I got through the door, I blew chunks." The second guy said, "You think that was drunk? Hell, I got into my car and wrapped my car around the first tree I saw. I don't even have insurance!" The third guy proclaimed, "Damn, I was the drunkest by far. When I got home, I got into a big fight with the wife, knocked a candle over, and burned the whole house down!" The room was silent for a moment. Then, the first guy spoke out again, "Listen, guys, I don't think you understand... Chunks is my dog." Quote
ExtremoMtDude Posted June 5, 2003 Posted June 5, 2003 Even though you are a big "L", and that sure dum diditily don't mean LOL, those jokes were good Sphincter! Quote
iain Posted June 5, 2003 Posted June 5, 2003 LOL! makes me want to go rent Hot Dog good jokes and good jibs to boot RIP IT UP Quote
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