Mixed Climbing

[Alex]

 

"Most types of climbing are garbage. Look: High altitude? Boring as shit and you’re too shagged at the end of the day to get into a good scrap, which is the best part of climbing. Sport climbing? Please. Scrawny-assed nancy boys trembling between bolts. Trad climbing? Yeah sure, if you don’t mind how much the wool itches and ignore all the losers. Ice climbing? Boring. It’s only vertical; too fucking easy. Soloing? What’s the point if no one’s watching? Mixed climbing? Too many useless wankers these days. Aid climbing? If I’m gonna be a bleeding carpenter, I’m gonna get fuckin' paid for it. Bouldering? Come on. It’s so frikkin’ boring they even carry mattresses. See what I mean?… Oh, wait a minute there aren’t any kinds left. Okay, mixed climbing then. Try mixed climbing ’cuz I’m better at it than you’ll ever be. "

 

http://www.falling.ca/

[Bogen]

I should kick the living crap out of you. Sitting around reading this fudge-packin rag when you could be reading one of my books and learning something? Wanker. Drooling over pictures of some titless sport betty when you should be memorizing my moves? You useless, bolt-addicted pansy. But at least you’ve finally come to the right bloke. Those other “How-to” poofters don’t know shit about climbing. Let’s take a look at their “advice” and just try and tell me that their frikkin’ heads shouldn’t be nailed to the floor: