burchey Posted July 5, 2012 Share Posted July 5, 2012 With all the recent news of climbers dying on the mountain, this one down close to me Michael Ybarra lost on Sawtooth solo I've been giving some thought to the amount of risk we often take on a climb. I don't have a wife(husband) or kids, but I know a lot of us do. I probably will at some point. How much, if any, did you dial it back once the little ones came along? Is it bad form to continue to ratchet up the difficulty and commitment of your climbs as your experience/skills grow, even if you've got a family waiting on you? I'm torn on this - we could get creamed on the commute to the office for sure, but there's no question that a lot of this is asking for an early grave. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tyson.g Posted July 6, 2012 Share Posted July 6, 2012 (edited) I really felt as the birth of my daughter approached, two years ago that I would scale back and maybe pick objectives that were more "safe". I have found though in practice this is not the case. What I have found to be the case however, is being entirely present with my spouse and daughter while at home and not climbing and increasing my insurance coverage. I would add this quote form the end of your linked article that I feel is poignant: "Everything in life is a risk of some sort," with some climbers killed or injured just driving home from the cliffs. "Climbing holds can break unexpectedly, but lightning also strikes. Most people exist so swaddled against danger, measuring out their lives with coffee spoons, that those who reckon by a different calculation of risk and reward appear insane. Yet to survive a perilous situation is to love life more than the average person can imagine." Edited July 6, 2012 by Tyson.g Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rob Posted July 6, 2012 Share Posted July 6, 2012 It would be easier for me to take risks if my kids had a mother to take care of them in case I died, but since becoming their sole-provider I've stopped climbing entirely. I mean, I already have great insurance and they'd be rich if I died, but who would raise them? Unfortunately my insurance doesn't cover that. Plus, I'm not sure how they'd handle another upheaval like that, although kids are surprisingly resilient. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kevbone Posted July 6, 2012 Share Posted July 6, 2012 I quit soloing...... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ed_Hobbick Posted July 6, 2012 Share Posted July 6, 2012 Yeah, I think that it would be bad to continually ratchet up the risk. A guy could still climb some nice mountains, but he should keep the risk within reasonable parameters. He should set an example of a life well lived. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rob Posted July 6, 2012 Share Posted July 6, 2012 on the other side of the coin, I see a lot of people get fat after starting a family -- this is really risky, too. Don't get fat. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
burchey Posted July 6, 2012 Author Share Posted July 6, 2012 "Everything in life is a risk of some sort," with some climbers killed or injured just driving home from the cliffs. "Climbing holds can break unexpectedly, but lightning also strikes. Most people exist so swaddled against danger, measuring out their lives with coffee spoons, that those who reckon by a different calculation of risk and reward appear insane. Yet to survive a perilous situation is to love life more than the average person can imagine." That is a great bit there. I think this probably ties in with the attitude that your life is on the major back-burner when you become a parent, in pretty much all ways. Still stay fit, obviously, but in ways that might do better to keep you alive. Maybe no soloing like KB says. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rad Posted July 6, 2012 Share Posted July 6, 2012 I'm growing out my hair and shopping for a red Prana top Jacinda Hunter - Balancing climbing and family Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mattp Posted July 6, 2012 Share Posted July 6, 2012 Rob, I've posted this same point before on cc.com but a friend of mine once pointed out that disability insurance maybe more important than life insurance. If you die, it is bad. But if you "merely" suffer brain injury or spinal injury and become totally dependent, much worse (financially and maybe emotionally). You won't be bringing in any income AND they'll have to support you. And you may not be you. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lummox Posted July 6, 2012 Share Posted July 6, 2012 Climbing is for the narcissistic. Let go of your self importance then you will realize no one gives a fuck what choices a person makes in this life regarding perceived risk. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
burchey Posted July 6, 2012 Author Share Posted July 6, 2012 Climbing is for the narcissistic. Let go of your self importance then you will realize no one gives a fuck what choices a person makes in this life regarding perceived risk. No question on the narcissism. However, if you've got a wife and two toddlers, I can think of three people that might give a fuck. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tyson.g Posted July 6, 2012 Share Posted July 6, 2012 Climbing is for the narcissistic. This part is true. The rest is bullshit, I think Burchey nailed it but I would add that your parents, friends and family DO care. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jim Posted July 6, 2012 Share Posted July 6, 2012 I'm growing out my hair and shopping for a red Prana top Jacinda Hunter - Balancing climbing and family The walk to the base of the Tieton is more risky than sport climbing. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
G-spotter Posted July 6, 2012 Share Posted July 6, 2012 I don't have a wife(husband) or kids, but I know a lot of us do. I probably will at some point. I don't think you have to worry about that, actually. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
burchey Posted July 6, 2012 Author Share Posted July 6, 2012 I don't have a wife(husband) or kids, but I know a lot of us do. I probably will at some point. I don't think you have to worry about that, actually. Are you going to supply some aloe for that burn? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
markwebster Posted July 6, 2012 Share Posted July 6, 2012 Sorry to hear about another bold soul passing. I'd like to think that the extra safety measures I take (helmet, big rack, no free soloing) keep me safer, but it's probably not true. Still, 35 years of climbing isn't a bad track record. There is a lot of danger in climbing that is unavoidable. All routes have sections with no gear...some approaches are worse than the climb. I've stayed the same risk wise, before and after raising kids. If I have some close calls, I take an ocean hike and do some painting. But I always come back to climbing. It's more dangerous than golfing...but golfing looks so dang boring! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
eldiente Posted July 6, 2012 Share Posted July 6, 2012 It's more dangerous than golfing...but golfing looks so dang boring! About 100 people per year die golfing every year in the US. How many rock climbers do you think die every year? I don't know but I bet it is a rather low number. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tyson.g Posted July 6, 2012 Share Posted July 6, 2012 The average deaths from rock climbing over the past 50 years is 25 deaths per year. The number of deaths from rock climbing varies significantly each year, do to popularity shift and technological advances. During the last ten years, the most fatalities in a year were 35 climbing deaths in 2004, while 2001 recorded 16. 1976 recorded the largest amount of deaths at 53. 2010 is expected to have 30 deaths contributed to rock climbing. Citations:http://climbing.about.com/b/2010/09/06/will-2010-be-a-record-year-for-climbing-d... Read more: http://greenanswers.com/q/195926/recreation-activities/outdoor-recreation/climbing/how-many-people-die-rock-climbing-every-y#ixzz1zsm7A8ij Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rob Posted July 6, 2012 Share Posted July 6, 2012 It's more dangerous than golfing...but golfing looks so dang boring! About 100 people per year die golfing every year in the US. How many rock climbers do you think die every year? I don't know but I bet it is a rather low number. According to the National Golf Foundation, there were nearly 30 million golfers in the U.S. in 2009. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lummox Posted July 7, 2012 Share Posted July 7, 2012 The average deaths from rock climbing over the past 50 years is 25 deaths per year. That number comes from stats compiled by the American Alpine Club. Weather caused fatalities are not necessarily included. Is canyoneering, backcountry skiing, or trail hiking a type of "climbing"? The ANAM average represents a low baseline number IMO. Something like 8people/year get killed by lightning each year in Teton NP alone. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
akhalteke Posted July 7, 2012 Share Posted July 7, 2012 Climbing is for the narcissistic. Let go of your self importance then you will realize no one gives a fuck what choices a person makes in this life regarding perceived risk. Ding Ding Ding Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
John Frieh Posted July 11, 2012 Share Posted July 11, 2012 "This is what you want, but this is what you get" Does anyone really, truly believe they are 100% in control? Don't dilute yourself. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Choada_Boy Posted July 11, 2012 Share Posted July 11, 2012 Does anyone really, truly believe they are 100% in control? Don't dilute yourself. Are you suggesting that climbing requires 100% concentration? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
olyclimber Posted July 11, 2012 Share Posted July 11, 2012 interesting cloud formation! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
montypiton Posted July 12, 2012 Share Posted July 12, 2012 I married late - 38 - as I was transitioning out of guiding. My wife was the widow of a long-time climbing partner who'd crashed a paraglider. When we married, I promised I wouldn't fly. We honeymooned at Red Rocks, and our three sons learned to climb as they learned to walk. Ever take a two-year-old up Orchard Rock? We climbed easy stuff when they were little, but they could follow anything I could lead by the time they were in middle school. My youngest boy climbed Louise Falls when he was 12. I believe you should follow your joy, and share it with those you love. Even the healthiest of us feel pain. Even the richest of us want. And every one of us will be dead soon enough. Dialing back will not prevent my loved ones from experiencing pain, and want, and death - although it may reduce the joy I can share with them. Three years ago, after climbing 40 years, the shit finally hit the fan. On an alpine trip with my youngest son (16 at that time) we got caught near the top of a mixed route in a sudden storm. Lightning struck the ridge above us and triggered an avalanche of ice and rock that scraped me and my belay off the face, and fortunately severed the rope to my son, who was able to shelter in a lateral moat. He downclimbed, unroped, the mixed route we'd climbed on belay, astounding the party who'd witnessed the event and rushed to my aid. I broke pretty much everything, and spent the next two months flat on my back. I will continue psychotherapy and medication for life to address the brain damage. I was climbing again four months later, and am back to almost the same technical level at which I was climbing before the fall, though with less stamina. Before this experience, I had always thought I'd prefer death to serious injury, but I've found myself amazingly happy from the start. Surprisingly, I found being bedridden to be exciting! Each day, there was some small thing that I hadn't been able to do the day before. The gains come slower, now, and I'm learning patience. My psychotherapist had been a world-class ice-climber before he crashed a bicycle 15+ years ago and found himself paralyzed below the chest. Still paralyzed, he has learned to WALK with two canes. He kayaks weekly year-round, with friends who help him into and out of his boat. There are things he could do before the crash that he cannot now do - yet. But each time I see him, he's excited about something he can do that he couldn't do at our last meeting. He refuses to consider himself "disabled". Oh - almost forgot - my son has been teaching his girlfriend to climb this summer... I have the choice - live till I die, or die till I'm dead. Dial it back? Not a chance! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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