pope Posted January 2, 2002 Share Posted January 2, 2002 I would like to extend my gratitude to Mr. Dwayner for introducing me to SAUNA SAUSAGE. That’s right, yes yes, you heard right: SAUNA SAUSAGE. It all started when Dwayner suggested that we bring in the New Year right…not by boozin’ all night, sleeping ‘til noon, then bitching about a headache all day. No sir. We reject all of these traditions. Instead, we drank only half the night, got up at dawn, then bitched about our headaches all day while trail running near North Bend, and then Dwayner got an idea. Perhaps it was Pope’s mention of the Bacon-Egga-McBiscuit w/Cheese he had eaten for breakfast, perhaps it was the intense winds pounding Rattlesnake Ridge…whatever the inspiration, Dwayner suggested what would turn out to be the perfect New Year’s ritual: SAUNA SAUSAGE. I had no idea what the hell this meant, especially with Dwayner’s strange pronunciation of these words (sowna sowsudge). We drove from North Bend to a beautiful home on Lake Washington’s shore. When a kind and elderly woman answered the door, Dwayner uttered the words: SAUNA SAUSAGE. She erupted in laughter and immediately went outside to start the sauna, which, she explained, would not be ready for an hour, since it would need to reach about 220F before it could be considered ready for SAUNA SAUSAGE. Now I knew, SAUNA SAUSAGE did involve a sauna, and I began to suspect that a sausage would be somehow be key. After an hour of chatting with these gracious and remarkable people (she had in Finland researched the problem of determining the identity of the father when a mother suspected more than one possibility, and told of a young mother who revealed that each of the players on a local soccer team was quite possibly the father), Dwayner and I proceeded to the scalding-hot sauna, where, as you can probably guess, an enormous kielbasa sat cooking over the heating element. Our Finnish host explained that after eating sausage and drinking beer in the sauna, we were invited to enjoy a dip in the lake; she suggested that we should perhaps go in and out three times. Dwayner and I took her recommendation, going in and out three times. Then we got out of the sauna and, after cautiously climbing off the dock and into Lake Washington, immediately jumped back out of the frigid water. As we returned to the sauna, we noticed our hosts watching the show from the balcony, and we promised ourselves not to disappoint them with our next swim. In fact, we not only vindicated ourselves with a lengthier swim, we returned for a third and fourth swim. Then Dwayner announced to our hosts, “We found the experience to be so thoroughly invigorating, we returned for an extra lake swim. We are the hardy sons of the men who defeated the Nazis!” And with that, we ran for the sauna. Valuable SAUNA SAUSAGE lessons learned: 1. Don’t leave your sausage fork in the sauna, or if you do, expect it to reach the temperature of boiling water. 2. Anything left dangling stands a chance of being burned by the element.3. Sweaty man love is more easily performed when the man is already sweaty (although I’m only passing on this wisdom second-hand).4. When eating sausage in a dark sauna, you can expect to experience a couple of fork-wounds as it can be difficult to distinguish between sausages and appendages. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jon Posted January 2, 2002 Share Posted January 2, 2002 WTF????? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
To_The_Top Posted January 2, 2002 Share Posted January 2, 2002 Just got back from Sweden, another land of Saunas, they do some creative things, but the Finns sound like they have a corner on the sausage cooker. Was up in the winds at Granite mtn, and wish I was in a sauna. TTT Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
allthumbs Posted January 2, 2002 Share Posted January 2, 2002 You're becoming way bizarre Pope; your post dosen't even make sense ... take your vitamins and pray for a miracle. [ 01-02-2002: Message edited by: trask ] Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Richard_Pumpington Posted January 2, 2002 Share Posted January 2, 2002 I think this post was for 'AlpineK', because if there's anyone who needs some "sauna sausage lovin'", it's that guy! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dwayner Posted January 2, 2002 Share Posted January 2, 2002 Brother Trask wrote: "You're becoming way bizarre Pope; your post dosen't even make sense ..." Dude, it's all true, except for the sweaty-man stuff which I don't know anything about. Sow-na Sauoosage will make you a tougher, leaner and more focused alpinist...no doubt. By the way, a stiff dip into Lake Washington this time of year ain't so bad, but I don't recommend staying in for very long, and it's better if you do so after exiting a sauna and then returning followed by beer and sausage. - Dwayner P.S. WE ARE THE PROUD AND HARDY SONS OF THE GENERATION THAT DEFEATED THE NAZIS. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
willstrickland Posted January 2, 2002 Share Posted January 2, 2002 Ok, so judging from this post and Dwayner's Year of Big Who? thread, it's pretty obvious that you guys got dosed on NYE. So like, when you were talking to god, did he say anything about me? I mean I've got such a crush and everything. Those little gelatin squares are not mini-jello shots no matter what that hippie barista chick told you. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RURP Posted January 2, 2002 Share Posted January 2, 2002 This is RURP. Pope and Dwayner. You two are usually giant fools. I am embarassed to admit that you have exposed a secret of obtaining Big Wall hardiness. The sauna will make you tough and strong. And a roll in the snow is good if you are not near water. Sausage has lots of protein and will make you big and sturdy. More than once a year is not enough. Also, beating each other with twigs during the sauna experience is also good. You two are still giant fools. RURP has spoken. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Beck Posted January 2, 2002 Share Posted January 2, 2002 You quazi scandihoovians, you don't COOK SAUSAGE IN SAUNA, though I imagine Dwayner fed Pope a little "Sauna Sausage" of his own in there- Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
schlangeschmecker Posted January 2, 2002 Share Posted January 2, 2002 I imagine Dwayner fed Pope a little "Sauna Sausage" of his own in there....Ya, das stimmt. I vood imagine Dwayner to feed Pope with his "little" Sauna Sausage......afterall, vhat are his options? Ha ha, ha ha, ha ha ha. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
hikerwa Posted January 2, 2002 Share Posted January 2, 2002 sauna sausage sixty ninage.... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Scott_J Posted January 3, 2002 Share Posted January 3, 2002 sauna beer, sauna cheese, sauna sausage, etc. By the way the author to this thread mentioned a weird pronunciation to the beautiful perfect world of sauna. Well guess what, that is the proper pronunciation. Sauna time rules. I fucking love saunas. Sauna cook outs, drink outs, sauna pass outs, sauna swims,YES Dwayner, Sauna time is the greatest time in a Finnish lads life. Sisu Suomi Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
pope Posted January 3, 2002 Author Share Posted January 3, 2002 Yes, it's a hoot, Sisu. And feel free to accomodate Dwayner's appetite for sweaty Finnish lads next time you're ready for sauna time (instant sausage, just add water). Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dru Posted January 3, 2002 Share Posted January 3, 2002 in the sauna in the acc clubhouse in canmore, they make you sit on a towel so you dont make an asshole print on the wood seats. im sure poop and dwayner gave each other lots of sauna sausage prints. where was sexual chocolate? I bet he's sorry he missed out on a potential 3-way... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Beck Posted January 3, 2002 Share Posted January 3, 2002 Sowna!Sowna!Sowna! No sausage, please! but ya, sauna time is the best- in a distinct geographical area of the US, a combination of ethnography and climate ensured almost every home had a sauna out back or built in the basement. Everybody sauna'ed. A buddy of mine had a sauna built on a 8 foot trailer, he'd tow it around to parties out wherever it was needed. A great homeade stove design I've seen was a basic Alaskan barrel stove with a water barrel with water coil that ran through the main body of the stove- it would heat the water right quick. As to sauna parties, there's a very social element to sauna time. Guys and girls alike, all nekkid, drinking in a sweaty dark room, then sprints outside to roll around in the snow or a dip in the creek...what a way to spend those long winter nights! The sauna also is great in romance, as Pope and Dwayner have alluded to... [ 01-03-2002: Message edited by: Beck ] Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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