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I AM DAMN NEAR A FREE MAN AND A SUCCESS


billcoe

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My youngest, my son, Graduated early from High School 2 days ago! His worst subject, English, he got an A in an advance placement class and he's been accepted into college.

 

I AM DAMN NEAR A FREE MAN AND A SUCCESS

 

This was how I defined success as a young person. Raising my kids well was near the top of the list of things I felt was important. Now I must re-evaluate my life, take stock, and reallocate time and money for the future.

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Four months behind you dude...

 

Now I must re-evaluate my life, take stock, and reallocate time and money for the future.

 

Translation: buy even more climbing shit than I already have. You already have enough gear to outfit two simultaneous grade VII wall expeditions - start doing PT on that knee and prepare to lauch...! Sky's the limit...

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My youngest, my son, Graduated early from High School 2 days ago! His worst subject, English, he got an A in an advance placement class and he's been accepted into college.

 

I AM DAMN NEAR A FREE MAN AND A SUCCESS

 

This was how I defined success as a young person. Raising my kids well was near the top of the list of things I felt was important. Now I must re-evaluate my life, take stock, and reallocate time and money for the future.

 

Well done. :tup:

 

As someone who has succeeded in the fatherhood game, do you have any transferable wisdom to share?

 

Haven't reproduced yet, and have an incredible father of my own to serve as an example, but am always interested in hearing from other folks who have been down that path.

 

Any worries at the outset that never materialized and seem laughable in hindsight? Any challenges that you never saw coming but turned out to be the toughest that you had to face? Blessings that you never anticipated?

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Congrats to the kid.

 

I can't say this without sounding like a prick but I'll say it anyway. This is one small measure of the success of child raising. There are tons of kids out there who have been driven by a parent's image of success who are utter miserable messes. I hope that the confidence and positive self image of such an achievement is why you are so proud.

 

I had an interesting chat with a friend the other day about some socialogical experiments in child raising. They looked at a group of families that had the opportunity to have their child enrolled in a 'good' institution of learning. Some kids got in, others didn't. They found that the actual school was not as important to the child's success as the fact that the parents were willing to support their child in going to the school. Family support is more important to a child's well being than the path they take.

 

Please don't take this as an attack on your parenting. It just seemed like a one dimensional demonstration of success in an incredibly complex issue. I don't know you or the whole story.

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I raised three sons and, reflecting on the past, suggest the following:

 

1) Don't put work ahead of your kids, 2) Be there for them, 3) Listen when they talk.

 

Seems like such a short time ago they were running down the hallway in pajamas on Saturday morning. Now they are grown and doing their own thing. Like the old saying, raising kids is the most difficult job you will do with no training.

 

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JB, I'd almost have to write a book! Touch base when you're in town and I'll just tell you what I've learned. Main thing: you don't have to hit or spank. It's OK to keep that in your bag of tricks and you might have to use it one or twice when you get a head on conflict, but it's unnecessary as long as you pre-think what you want from them (at any age): so that it makes rational sense and has a valid reason that any rule or fiat is in place, and you are clear up front with expectations.

 

Hafilax - I don't think what you said is an attack, great points. I wanted well adjusted, happy, good people for kids....the A was only the icing on the cake, I totally agree with you. Both of my kids are liked by their peers, and show me beau coup respect and love to this day.

 

Jeffw nailed that one. So true!

 

Muff and Stefan: thanks!

 

Joseph, I'm about geared up now! Bought a "trad" chalk bag at REI yesterday which just about finished my gear needs off. The knee still has this interesting bump on it, but the lad, Ujahn and I were just last night doing some runs in the blizzard, it's was great. Best part (other than the kid can hang with Ujahn when I wash out), get to the car, lift the right ski pants up, kneel down and voila, Ice the leg! Jumped in the car and took a nap and they showed up 3 min after I woke up! Perfect timing.

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I raised three sons and, reflecting on the past, suggest the following:

 

1) Don't put work ahead of your kids, 2) Be there for them, 3) Listen when they talk.

 

Seems like such a short time ago they were running down the hallway in pajamas on Saturday morning. Now they are grown and doing their own thing. Like the old saying, raising kids is the most difficult job you will do with no training.

 

Shawn Kemp disagrees.

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That’s great Bill. Way to go……now we will see you at the crag even more this spring. I agree with no spanking or hitting. Are we not supposed to lead by example? What kind of example does it show our children when we strike or spank them? My father used to give me the load of crap right before I got whipped ….”This is going to hurt me more than it will hurt you”. I have made a conscious choice as a father not to travel down that path.

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Good job. I have two in college--one senior at WWU and one is a freshman at CWU. It's a great feeling knowing they will have all the tools they need to succeed along with a greater understanding of the world around them. Beware though; my oldest left high school with a 4.0 - all AP core classes - and still had "difficulties" her first year at Western.

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Good on ya, Bill. I'd tell you about my kids, but you wouldn't believe it. Sometimes, it seems there's no way we should receive the riches channeled through them to our hearts.

 

This morning, while waiting in the coffee shop, I told the city engineer I doubt I'd have "grown-up" without raising kids.

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From Wikipedia---

 

Kemp has been subjected to many paternity suits, having fathered thirteen out-of-wedlock children with nine different women[citation needed]. This number is alleged to be even higher, resulting in Kemp being an easy target for commentators' jokes (including a story arc in the syndicated comic strip Tank McNamara the week of September 10, 2007). One of Kemp's children, Shawn Kemp Jr., is a highly recruited basketball prospect who may attend the University of Kentucky like his father ---

 

Not sure I would be looking to Shawn Kemp for guidance on raising kids.

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Good on ya, Bill. I'd tell you about my kids, but you wouldn't believe it. Sometimes, it seems there's no way we should receive the riches channeled through them to our hearts.

 

This morning, while waiting in the coffee shop, I told the city engineer I doubt I'd have "grown-up" without raising kids.

 

i had that realization a few years ago. I was on a really bad road when i decided i wanted kids. i cleaned up my life and stayed cleaned up becuase i wanted what was best for them. acording to my theripist(and i agree) with out having had thing 1 and thing 2 there is a real chance i would not be alive today.

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first: Bill, you are so lucky and awesome...that rocks and i have a loooooong ways to go to be able to say what you did...congrats! i can't think of a finer achievement to take to the grave than yours...

 

My dad once said "They come out absolutely perfect, and its your job to minimize the damage that you do to them as they come up"...i don't agree with that...kids reflect back their parents' efforts and love, period...Maybe that is what he meant?

 

Anyway, congrats again...

 

Second, TRASH go find some where else to spray than this thread...

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