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Should you meet .....online singles in person


cindy66

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Uh oh... Boulder... you said the danger word. run away now while you still can, before the Boulder Brainwashing takes hold!

 

 

 

 

This is a bad thing?

 

Having lived in Boulder for 3 years I can tell you this. Boulder is a scary place, and you should feel fear.

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Handy Dictionary to decipher Personals Ads

 

WOMEN'S ADS

40-ish...................... 49

Adventurer.................. Slept with all your friends

Athletic.................... No tits

Average looking............. Has a face like a basset hound

Beautiful................... Pathological liar

Contagious Smile............ Does a lot of Ecstasy

Educated.................... Banged her Political Science professor

Emotionally Secure.......... Medicated

Free spirit................. Junkie

Friendship first............ Trying to live down reputation as a slut

Fun......................... Annoying

Gentle...................... Comatose

Good Listener............... Borderline Autistic

New-Age..................... All body hair, all the time

Old-fashioned............Lights out,missionary position only, no BJs

Open-minded................. Desperate

Outgoing.................... Loud and Embarrassing

Passionate.................. Sloppy drunk

Poet........................ Depressive Schizophrenic

Professional................ Certified Bitch

Redhead..................... Bad dye-job

Romantic.................... Looks better by candle light

Social.......... Has been passed around like an hors d'oeuvres tray

Wants Soulmate.............. Stalker

Widow....................... Drove first husband to shoot himself

Young at heart.............. Old bat

 

MEN'S ADS

40-ish................ 52 and looking for 25-yr-old

Athletic.............. Watches a lot of NASCAR

Average looking....... Unusual hair growth on ears, nose, & back

Educated.............. Will patronize the shit out of you

Free Spirit........... Banging your sister

Friendship first...... As long as friendship involves nookie

Fun................... Good with a remote and a six pack

Good looking.......... Arrogant

Very good looking..... Dumb as a board

Honest................ Pathological Liar

Huggable.............. Overweight, more body hair than a bear

Likes to cuddle....... Insecure mama's boy

Mature................ Older than your father

Open-minded........... Wants to sleep with your roommate but she's not interested

Physically fit........ Does a lot of 12-ounce curls

Poet.................. Wrote ex-girlfriend's # on a bathroom stall

Sensitive............. Cries at chick flicks

Very sensitive........ Gay

Spiritual............. Got laid in a cemetery once

Stable................ Arrested for stalking, but not convicted

Thoughtful............ Says "Excuse me" when he farts

 

 

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I think that would be "not getting outside much." :lmao:

 

Kevin, here on the interweb we have a thing called a "search engine." Now, understand that's not a literal phrase, it doesn't really have an engine, but it can find things all over the "net" as devotees call it. I suggest you employ one, many prefer the one called "google," and search the term "borat" which may enlighten you.

 

Also, her first name is pronounced "pah-mella"

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Handy Dictionary to decipher Personals Ads

 

WOMEN'S ADS

40-ish...................... 49

Adventurer.................. Slept with all your friends

Athletic.................... No tits

Average looking............. Has a face like a basset hound

Beautiful................... Pathological liar

Contagious Smile............ Does a lot of Ecstasy

Educated.................... Banged her Political Science professor

Emotionally Secure.......... Medicated

Free spirit................. Junkie

Friendship first............ Trying to live down reputation as a slut

Fun......................... Annoying

Gentle...................... Comatose

Good Listener............... Borderline Autistic

New-Age..................... All body hair, all the time

Old-fashioned............Lights out,missionary position only, no BJs

Open-minded................. Desperate

Outgoing.................... Loud and Embarrassing

Passionate.................. Sloppy drunk

Poet........................ Depressive Schizophrenic

Professional................ Certified Bitch

Redhead..................... Bad dye-job

Romantic.................... Looks better by candle light

Social.......... Has been passed around like an hors d'oeuvres tray

Wants Soulmate.............. Stalker

Widow....................... Drove first husband to shoot himself

Young at heart.............. Old bat

 

MEN'S ADS

40-ish................ 52 and looking for 25-yr-old

Athletic.............. Watches a lot of NASCAR

Average looking....... Unusual hair growth on ears, nose, & back

Educated.............. Will patronize the shit out of you

Free Spirit........... Banging your sister

Friendship first...... As long as friendship involves nookie

Fun................... Good with a remote and a six pack

Good looking.......... Arrogant

Very good looking..... Dumb as a board

Honest................ Pathological Liar

Huggable.............. Overweight, more body hair than a bear

Likes to cuddle....... Insecure mama's boy

Mature................ Older than your father

Open-minded........... Wants to sleep with your roommate but she's not interested

Physically fit........ Does a lot of 12-ounce curls

Poet.................. Wrote ex-girlfriend's # on a bathroom stall

Sensitive............. Cries at chick flicks

Very sensitive........ Gay

Spiritual............. Got laid in a cemetery once

Stable................ Arrested for stalking, but not convicted

Thoughtful............ Says "Excuse me" when he farts

 

 

 

 

Well from this I can interpret#1.....He is a pathological liar

#2.....He is good with a remote and a six pack of beer

#3......He is bangin my sister

#4...He is an insecure momma's boy

#5......He does the 12 ounce curls

#6...He cries at chick flicks

#7 He got laid in a cemetery once

#8.......My heart just stopped....quite possible he has been arrested but not convicted of stalking.......

oh great.....just great.......thank you for busting my bubble....

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