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Why is it...


DPS

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Is climbing an activity that is borne of love, or a need to prove one's self-worth? I see both motives at work within myself, and perhaps everyone I have ever climbed with.

 

When it becomes more of the latter, my climbing goes to pot. I become more competitive with others, I don't wish for their success, I harbor resentment and crappy feelings about myself, and all I can dwell on are the "failures". It seems pretty funny when I'm out of that cycle, but during it, it sucks!

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I never felt this way when I was younger, but from my current perspective life's failures can deepen the meaning of one's existence more than successes. More than easy successes, anyway... really, any endeavor where you have to draw on your deepest reserves, to go where you haven't had to go, adds to your life regardless of whether you succeed or fail in the end.

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I remember when I had a good time, or a bad time. I can't particularly say I remember my failures more than my successes but I would say that after getting defeated, I become more motivated to succeed on a particular line. I think it's only natural to want to overcome the climbs that present more of a challenge. There are definitely a couple lines that I have been bouted on that are top of the list for a 2006 rematch.

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I don't remember the name of anything. even the stuff I named. but I remember everything I have fallen from that remains incompleted although they are referred to most often as 'that one' or 'you know the one by the thing' or 'over by that other one, up the hill'. I may not remember their name, but I remember their face.

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