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Electras Controversy Surrounds Kerry

 

Boston, MA

 

An album released by a band called The Electras during the 60s has been selling on sites such as eBay for as much as $2,000. The reason? Senator John Kerry was the bassist on the less than hit record. However, recent reports have surfaced that the band may not have actually been playing their instruments on the album and were in fact lip-synching a la Milli Vanilli style.

 

John Doe, Democrat spokesman said, “These rumors that Senator Kerry was not playing the bass guitar are completely fabricated. The Senator has funk and mad riffs that the Republican smear machine can only dream about. Milli Vanilli stooped to great depths to conceal their lack of musical talent, although it must be said that were great dancers at least. To suggest that Senator Kerry would adopt such underhanded tactics in an age free of the pressure of MTV awards is utter nonsense.”

 

Scott McLellan, Republican spokesman claimed, “I have listened to the album and it’s quite clear to me that no rich whitey could ever have played that throbbing bass. That shit is off the hook and quite frankly, dope! Senator Kerry needs to step forward to quell these rumors and it seems that the only way the American public will be satisfied is if he forms a band reunion and plays a live gig somewhere – preferably on live T.V. Incidentally, President Bush was the real deal back in the day and was known to panhandle back in Texas belting out country classics such as Stand By Your Man.”

 

It remains to be seen what effect this will have on an election only 7 weeks away.

 

AP.

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AP. Update 10.28am

 

Kerry and Bush to Duke It Out on American Idol

 

Trying to appeal to the younger crowds amid controversy surrounding each candidate's musical abilities, President Bush and senator Kerry confirmed that they will forgo the 2nd presidential debate and instead appear on an American Idol special edition. Duets with some of today's hottest acts are rumored to be in the works.

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